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Does the idea of trying to know your values scare you? Do you feel like you have no values at all? #values #BPD #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder

I felt frozen when this topic came up. Fear that i have no values, shame and guilt for feeling indecisive about it and not knowing, fear of what could be my values, feeling helpless and hopeless about it and feeling resentful and angry about it. How do people know their values? What is the difference between values and beliefs? #Fear #Shame #anger #resentment #Guilt #BPD #helpless #hopeless #Indecisive #Judgement

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Bouncing between thoughts

I’ve been dealing with a lot of indecision lately and this is a sign for me my mental health is getting bad. I will become indecisive about the smallest things in worry my choice will sway things largely in one direction and I will regret so instead of choosing, I just swing back and fourth all day. I have been struggling with feeling great about where I am in life and feeling so far behind. I’m 23 and a mature student taking time away from my degree right now. I have a long term partner and we are trying so hard to work towards our own home because we want children in the future. The pandemic threw us for a loop as my partners course was cancelled and our financial status obviously suffered as well this year. We are living with my parents and its very tough. So many old friends from school are having babies, working jobs they achieved by attending university and getting married, some are buying homes too. Its hard to not feel jealous. Its hard to not rush and enjoy the place we are at because we have had many set backs. We have now learned to trust in our own process and not take advice from our parents who constantly are at us about being successful. I dont want to take their advice, money does not mean happiness and while I would enjoy being financially confident, we tried to do what they said to do and we ended up worse off then we are now. Anyway, I’m having a hard time organizing these thoughts and managing my indecisiveness while trying to understand its okay to be where I am in life. I dont really know. #Anxiety #Depression #Indecisive #overwhelmed #tired #sad


Is it bad to still care about ex?

I like this new guy and he’s not happy with me showing care for my ex. My ex was a bad guy but still I am a human with bpd and I can’t see him getting upset because of me. Can somebody tell me what to do ? I am not in contact with my ex but I reached out to one of his friends to take care of him. What was so bad about it?
On top of all this, I am getting a new therapist. My ex keeps sending me 100s of msgs. We took a sick dog to vet. His condition made me cry so probably I am not numb or am I numb conditionally

#BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Indecisive #Notsureifididtherightthing


Do I need to confirm with my therapist before I date a guy?

So I have been into a lot of impulsive relationships. I was actually trying to fill the emptiness inside me with the guys I dated. Expecting them to fill the gap with love. I realised this when I fell for a another guy. Whenever I am with him, I don’t feel empty. And when I am not, I feel empty again. Am I am getting into the same pattern again? And my head’s so cloudy that I am not sure how to decide! If I ask my I have to ask her such questions, every time I like some guy?

#Indecisive #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #RelationshipBPD


Trouble making decisions #Indecisive

Even though I’m a 28 year old woman I find myself having the hardest time making decisions. Big or small. It seems like the older I get the worse I get. I’m not on any medications and I haven’t seen a doctor about my anxiety troubles. Is this worth telling a doctor? Sometimes I feel afraid to make any decisions on my own. I feel better if I have a friend or someone with me to help. I feel like it makes me look bad and immature.

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Indecision is ruining me #Anxiety #Indecisive #Depression #Guilt

••The photo I attached has no significance other than nature being my crutch lately and it helps to enjoy the small things so i’ve been trying to get outside and be mindful. ••The entire month of June has been incredibly rough for me. I have been so restless and bored constantly and this allows my mind to run wild and create up things to obsess over or try to control. The boredom makes me feel guilty and useless. Guilty because I should be working (am struggling to find a job) or doing something productive like most people around me seem to be doing. I feel useless because everyone else seems to be proud of their accomplishments, no matter how big or small, yet I never feel like I have accomplished enough. I try to clean & organize my apartment, read self help books, take resumes around my city, look into courses for this coming Fall. It feels like no matter what I do, i’ve never done enough, in my OWN mind. Everyone around me encourages me (for the most part) and tells me I’m doing great considering I’m without a job right now but I feel like a loser. I would never consider someone else in my position to be a loser so why am I being so hard on myself? Ive caused myself to be incredibly indecisive and its tearing me apart. Because I never feel fulfilled with what i’m doing, Ive found it easier to just not make choices because it seems I can never make the right choice. It hurts me. It hurts because I’m resilient and I know I have confidence somewhere deep in me but i’m a shell of myself and I know it hurts my partner to see me struggle so hard.