So I been going to this “trauma college” six months now and they have taught me ACT skills, the most mindblowing being that you can have values and when you do things that move you away from your values you tend to feel like crap/maybe accomplish less.
I was brought up a messages that told me not only did I not matter but that I better be perfect or risk death, all the while being abused from all sides for like my first 16 years. We also moved around so much I never formed solid connections outside myself and so I guess it’s why I now realize; Disassciative Identity Disorder perfect fits me. The idea that I’m allowed to even discover my values is great, but how am I supposed to move towards any that I identify if 1.) some of my parts value exactly the opposite of what other parts value, and 2.) I don’t even yet know all my parts but I DO know that (how unfair!) if they don’t all have a say some will act out even tho I don’t know what they want??