mixed episodes

I just wrote this as a reply to a comment but I’ll repost it here. So you can see it too. It is my most sincere thank YOU.

“Life’sfunny…
I just joined Mighty, something I never even knew existed until last saturday. Ive spent the past couple of days going on and on and on about my life .. kinda like a cathartic series of monologues about pieces of me that ive hardly ever talked about before…all with strangers … humpf
as i read their stories, related to their doubts, learned from their experiences, i felt something taking over me … something i couldnt quite figure out at the time … ive been feeling so weird lately with so many mixed episodes that putting a label on it kinda felt pointless.

Now , after 3 days , it finally hit me…that unfamiliar “something” was actually me feeling Seen for the first time in a long time. Thanks to you here in this community …through your courage, your pain, your joy , your lessons, I saw myself. I saw myself as normal. Like you.
A group of strangers who inadvertently saved my life during what could have been a very sad ( and regretful ) weekend.
Im grateful to you. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.” #BipolarDisorder #Mania #BipolarDepression #MentalHealth #PTSD #MixedEpisodes #Anxiety #Depression #manicdepression

Its so weird how, For example , in the middle of a conversation I realize im starting to take things veeeery personally, Things i normally wouldnt. I have to stop the other person and literally say: “ok,lets come back to this later, what you re saying and what im hearing are different things” . Manic depressive episodes scare the hell out of me… When my mood is crashing, the emptiness is so so so harsh I dont even want to get back to “normal” because i think normal is useless, not worth the trouble. I dont wanna bother people because im always afraid they ll think i just want attention. Last time my sister told me i kept repeating “even when im doing my best im not enough” and that lasted for 5 days after a webinar that didnt go as i hoped. Im not new to mistakes. I normally see them as lessons and a chance to do better.. but when im down.. uff. Im so afraid of what i might do to end the hopelessness : (
#BipolarDisorder #Mania #MixedEpisodes #MixedState #MentalHealth #PTSD

Just wanted to share this with my Bipolar support group as an informative tool or guide you can save & look at whenever you need too! Of course I'm not a Dr & you should always follow the advice of your mental health professionals & your Doctor's! But I figured it could help some of us that doesn't exactly have Dr or anything right now! I hope this helps everyone!! ✌️💚☯️💪🙋

Sorry about the S word! But I thought this was cute & light & funny to send this early morning hours of Monday!! ✌️💚☯️💪🙋