Persistent Depressive Disorder

Hello everyone; I'm still kinda new to TheMighty and brand new to this Group, so I wanted to introduce myself and kinda explain what I'm doing here and what I hope to get out of this group.

My name is Ashlie. I'm from PA, USA. I turn 30 in 2 days. I'm divorced and have a boyfriend of 2ish years (we never really kept track of an anniversary date). I have an 8 year old daughter with my exhusband and 50/50 custody where she spends 2 weeks with me & my boyfriend and two weeks with her father at his mother's house. It's hard not having her for two weeks, but I'm also grateful for her relationship with her father and his family.

I work from home, overnight, as a supervisor at a call center, so it's a lot of metrics reports and presentations, employee development and evaluations, and answering questions if anyone needs help with their calls or tickets. Not super interesting, but entertaining enough; I like the data analysis side of it more than the employee evaluations, but I digress.

It's funny, when you start thinking of your hobbies, you start to realize that you're actually quite boring lol I like puzzles, normal jigsaw puzzles and also any sort of strategic puzzle games. I play a lot of single-player video games on my PC - a lot of the Fallout games, Satisfactory, Portal, Raft, Don't Starve, Cities: Skylines, stuff like that. Apocalyptical or city building type games. I like a lot of different tv shows; some things I frequently rewatch are Bojack Horseman, Doctor Who, Big Bang Theory, Smiling Friends, Family Guy, American Dad, Rick and Morty, House, Weeds, Archer, Always Sunny in Phila, Bobs Burgers, and honestly soo soo many more.

I am diagnosed with ADHD, Persistent depressive disorder (aka dysthymia), general anxiety disorder, panic disorder, and obsessive compulsive disorder. Undiagnosed, but I feel strongly that I also have Borderline Personality Disorder, but this is unconfirmed. I don't have a doctor that I actually talk to at the moment, just med checks. I take Vyvanse and Lexapro. My disorders are not currently under control with the current meds, but I'm having an impossibly hard time finding anyone to talk about it. Everywhere is completely booked. I use medical marijuana (it's only legal medically in my state) in addition to my meds to battle the symptoms.

I'd like a friend that has similar interests as me and understands my struggle with mental illness. I don't have any friends that share my interests. I have a lot of mentally ill friends, and we bond over that, but I found that I don't really otherwise have anything in common with them. I'd like a friend that likes what I like.

Wow, that was long, so I'm going to wrap this up! Thanks for reading if you got this far, hope to hear from you.

I checked my weight yesterday and discovered that all the weight I’d lost before the pandemic has returned, and 20lbs more. I am now at my heaviest - ever.

It took a long time, 2 eating disorder programs, and somebody being mad/disappointed at me to regain the weight. Add in Persistent Depressive Disorder, Spondylitis, and MS and I’m looking at a very long road to getting back to the pre-pandemic me.

My diagnosis was recently changed from simply Major Depressive Disorder to Persistent Depressive Disorder. It's no wonder I'm on antidepressant 15 or 17. I lost count. I’ve been officially depressed for over 20 years. I always thought it would get better. Now I know for sure I will always have a black cloud above my head. Everything will always be a shade of gray. What do I hope for now? I don't want to be sad forever.
#PersistentDepressiveDisorder

So I finally started therapy during the pandemic and I was actually doing ok. Not great, but I was doing so much better than I had in a long time. This year was my senior year of high school so there were a lot of extra stressors in my life on top of just dealing with life in general but through therapy (especially EMDR therapy) I got through them. I was doing so well that my therapist told me that believed I no longer needed therapy. At the time I truly believed that too. But now I’m slipping back into depression and anxiety (I have persistent depressive disorder and generalized anxiety disorder). I am so exhausted all the time but when night comes I can’t asleep. I just lay in bed for hours upon hours not being able to sleep. Some nights my head is racing with thoughts, while other nights it’s just so quiet and lonely. I can’t do anything during the day because I’m so tired. But it makes me even more depressed because I keep missing more and more of my life. Even the days that I actually get myself to leave the house and do something, the night isn’t any different. It’s just exhausting being so exhausted.
#Depression #Anxiety #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorder #PersistentDepressiveDisorder

I have depression and anxiety, been diagnosed with GAD & PDD (generalized anxiety disorder & persistent depressive disorder) i take medication that helps alot! I struggle alot with low self esteem & being self conscious in social settings. I think back to when i was a kid & how free i was, would love to have more of that now! Anybody have advice?

Even though you’re right next to me I still feel lonely #lonely #sad #Depression #PersistentDepressiveDisorder #PersistentDepressiveDisorderDysthymia #dysthemia