Awake at night
It's almost 1 am and I can't sleep. My mind keeps playing several scenes, like a movie. Scenes of my friend and our friendship. The friend who has been hurting me. Or, better, the friend who has been the reason why I have been hurting myself. He didn't do anything, he is just staying away struggling with depression and engaged in his own life, while I watch my self esteem being challenged. Maybe I am a reinforcing seeker. Why would a person be so attached to someone when there's absolutely no romantic feelings involved? Why am I so? This question tricks me. A side of me which doesn't make any sense. Maybe I am just to proud to walk away from what has become now a toxic friendship. It's all in my mind anyway.