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Nicked myself to deal with the greif, like I'm 15, haven't done that since daughter's abuse at my Birthday at least 4 years ago, look Suicidal Ideation seems like a joke but its real, its a figment of abuse and too much pressure n low finances, worst f ing nite of my life in a long time since arrests restraints n cuffs, but you give vows!!!!

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I'm new here!

Is Emotional Abuse Domestic Violence In Virginia if it involves threats, intimidation, or coercive control, affecting the victim's safety and well-being, potentially leading to protective orders.

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Depression Is A Shadow

I can still feel his hands on me, I still shiver at the thought of his warm, alcohol breath against my skin. I can still see his eyes in my head, eyes that undressed me over and over and over again. How could I have been so naive? How could I be so gullible to believe that he actually cared? I look back and realize that that wasn't me. I wasn't thinking. My depression clouded my judgment. I was nothing but a body, hollow, thoughtless, emotionless, yet the emptiness was stronger and louder than anything else, but now, now I know that I was trying to fill the void with something that I felt I deserved. Depression is funny that way. #Depression lies to you. It lingers, invites itself in and settles. My depression changed everything I believe in, everything I stand for. Depression never completely goes away, it's outside the window, waiting and hoping that you'll be weak enough to open the door and let it back in.
#Trauma #Abuse #MentalHealth #Depression #PTSD

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Speaking Out

I kept my secrets to myself for many, many years. I was embarrassed, ashamed, didn’t think I’d be believed. I thought I was doing okay. I wasn’t. I was barely managing. I fell apart so easily. I didn’t trust anybody. When I started therapy 6 years ago, I planned to continue to keep my secrets. It was a battle. I got worse mentally. I couldn’t sleep, cried constantly. My faith was not helping and I felt like a failure. What was wrong with me?
Thankfully, my therapist didn’t give up. He kept pushing me. I remember when I finally told him about the trauma that had happened to me. There was no lightning strike. I didn’t die. He wasn’t disgusted with what I told him. He was sorry it had happened to me.
Moving forward, Dr. G had me write down memories of my abuse. We would read them at my sessions. Painful at first, those memories lost their power over me. I still remember them, but they’re dulled. Unthreatening.
I am so very thankful I spoke out about my past. Healing is happening. I wish each one of us could have a Dr. G. If not, I hope you can confide in a friend, pastor, or teacher or family member. And, of course, you can always share with your Mighty family. We hear you. 🫶🏻

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#MightyPoets Untitled 23

Why the hands that once wrapped around my waist, ended up around my neck

And why?

If everything apparently happens for a reason

What was the reason for the the person whom I love, would do that to me?

Is it possible to love someone, yet want to hurt them so badly?

“Think of how an accusation like that would ruin his life think about the choice you are making”.
But the choice was never mine.

And why
Why is it, that I love this person?
With all of my heart

The same heart he once tried to stop from beating.

When not with hands, with words and venom.

Spiting vitriol as easily as taking your next breath.

So unworthy and unlovable, the slurs engraved in my mind.

And you never admit it, to doing any of it

You didn’t just hurt me, or lied to me, or called me names.

You didn’t just inflict physical harm on me

You broke a really deep part of me inside

A part I have only now just started to get back.

#KeepTalkingMH #MentalHealth #Anxiety #PostTraumaticStressDisorder #MightyPoets #Trauma #DomesticViolence #Abuse

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I'm new here!

Hi, my name is Ncpas15. I'm here because I have C-PTSD from regular physical, psychological, verbal (any kind of abuse really) that was inflicted upon me by family. This has caused me to have very debilitating anxiety, to have very little trust in people and to have a horrible self image that keeps me away from the world at large. I'm here because I've never met anyone who has went through or felt the same things I have and I'm hoping to get some perspective from people who are further along in healing that I am and have found ways to deal with the feelings I have

#MightyTogether #Anxiety #PTSD #OCD #PanicDisorder

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I’m new here!

Hi, my name is MyDruthers. I'm here because my wonderful therapist said it’s time to “widen my circle” in order to get the support I need right now; even twice-weekly therapy isn’t doing it, I’m reluctant to overburden my friendships, and I feel indescribably alone.

I’m dealing with so, so much, and although I’ve survived really tough stuff in my life — most recently, caring for my mom with Dementia for 8 years, surviving the breast cancer I was diagnosed with when she died 5 years ago, raising my daughter (now 15) in the midst of an abusive marriage (20 years long), leaving my psychopathic/narc ex — the current custody battle (2 years long so far, the second one in 5 years) has me nearly bottoming out in despair every week or so. I will eventually resume EMDR, since that was derailed when the current crisis hit.

My ex is also a therapist/psychologist, currently practicing , and licensed in 4 states — he is a demon, especially in the courtroom, and although I managed to get 100% custody of my child the first go-round, I’m in a different (more conservative) state now and the philosophy here is that it’s always better for kids to have relationships with both mom and dad, even when there’s been family violence, even when there’s been SA.

Current challenges: I’ve had to switch attorneys, these master manipulators continue their abuse by using the court system, and the family law system seems blind to it. Just yesterday, I received a form letter from CPS telling me they’ve closed the investigation into him, which means my child has once again been let down by someone that was supposed to watch out for her.

I’m tired of weighing my friendships down with my deep and ongoing need for support and understanding, so I’m turning to this community, which I’ve heard such great things about. I don’t know my way around, but if anything I’ve said resonates with you, please reach out. Maybe we can lift each other up. Thanks for reading. 💕

#MightyTogether #PTSD #narcdivorce #narccustody #Anxiety #Depression #ADHD

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I'm new here!

i want end my life , my father abuse me and violate me even im +18, i work with him in his company , im a hard worker i give it all but even so he still treat me as worthless garbage and if i make any small mistake he will violate me verbally and sometimes physically i cant afford living alone yet and none of my family members could help even with talking to him, i just found that ending my life is the only solution #MightyTogether #Depression

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The Wreckage of the Narcissist

#Photo by Marek Piwnicki on Unsplash

Narcissism is insidious.

Here you are cruising through life on a highway and things are going pretty good. There is the odd curve every now and then but it’s no problem for you to navigate through them. You feel quite confident you have this life driving thing figured out.

Then one day you meet someone who creates this whirlwind of a situation when you first get together. It’s exciting, it makes you feel alive and excited. Your car is now speeding on that highway, but boy does it feel good to throw caution to the wind and push down that gas pedal.

After a while, they start growing complacent with their ‘be on best behavior so the little potholes in the road that were there when they were testing you in the beginning have now turned almost crater like from their random temper outbursts.

Still, the potholes aren’t all that common and you can typically steer around them, so you aren’t bothered by those red flags too much.

When their complacency switches to devaluing you notice that there are potholes every hundred yards or so. Sometimes it’s pothole after pothole so you’re concentrating heavily on the road to make sure you miss these what are now more common events than ever.

You start to glaze over as a defense mechanism from the near daily fights. They’ve been chipping away at your self-esteem and self-worth so much you’re fighting depression constantly.

The car is getting worn down. You’ve been going nonstop through this Death Valley of road hazards and the potholes you couldn’t avoid have started adding up.

Your wheels are out of alignment, your tires are balled, you haven’t had a good tune up since you met your narcissist. The worn windshield wipers create a hypnotic effect as you are used to the narcissists abuse the wipers lull you into a trance as your life goes back and forth from abuse to niceness.

You get thinking though, it hasn’t been going from abuse to kindness that changed sometime its now actually abuse to less abuse and you’ve just grown accustomed to it so you don’t really acknowledge it but like those worn wiper blades it makes your field of vision very narrow for what is truly going on in your life. Zoned out you stare ahead automatically driving without any conscious thought put into any of your actions.

Then suddenly, out of the blue your narcissist grabs that steering wheel and gives it a yank. You weren’t expecting it because you’re so overwhelmed, so tired, so depressed that you were just blindly gazing forwards.

The narcissists little trick sure took you by surprise. As you come out of your daze from the sudden unpredictable abandonment you realize that you’re not on the highway anymore, you’re now in the ditch going 80 mph.

You instinctively jerk the wheel to get the car back on life’s highway where it’s safe. Your reaction was seen as clingy and needy, and you got devalued as you tried to right the car on life's highway. You’re doing your best to keep everything going but your reaction is now getting blamed for the reason they are leaving. You’re too smothering and dependent on them!

Suddenly you realize that you’re not in the driver's seat, the narcissist was and when you looked over to see what he/she was going to do next you realized that they bailed out already. It’s just you and this cruise missile that you’re on which is aimed at an embankment.

You struggle to keep it going. When you somehow managed not to roll by grabbing the steering wheel you breathe a sigh of relief thinking you’ve got this handled now.

Only, the narcissist couldn’t very well have you escape with no damage. How else are they to feel superior to you? The narcissist took the keys from the car when they jumped out of your car into the hot young neighbors who had pulled up beside you without you noticing. The betrayal is staggering as you realize you can’t steer the car without power steering!

In that moment, your entire relationship begins to flash through your mind as your car hits the approach and begins to turn in the air like a corkscrew going into a bottle.

You feel okay, nice and numb and a little overwhelmed, but you feel okay.

Then you are forced to get grounded and when your car hits the earth again it rolls multiple times. Your finances come to mind as you watch the front end of the car collapse into itself. The car is racking up financial losses just like you had been doing.

Flip after flip, the car tears down the ditch collapsing more and more each time it connects with a new spot onto the ground. Finally, the car stops. Smoke is billowing up from the engine compartment which blows into the car because all of the windows are shattered out because the roof is now 6" lower than it was before.

You sense real danger but you’re near crippled from the realization of it all. There is no delusion in your mind now. You see how bad things really are. You begin to drag yourself maimed and broken from the wreck.

Each broken promise, each anniversary special occasion wrecked comes to the forefront of your mind as you scratch your way to safety one pull at a time.

Your car suddenly explodes and erupts into fire burning the last money that you had in your wallet. Your life is shattered.

You have no idea how you’re going to carry on. You are in so much pain you can’t do anything but howl in agony and rage. As you lay there waiting for an ambulance, your narcissist drives by with his/her new friend groping them like it’s a porn movie.

They do not stop. They do not care.

Alone you sit in your pain. Alone you must find the strength to rebuild. Out from the ashes of this life wreckage will rise a phoenix.

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Bad hour

HI, I'm worried about my elderly's health care, he's being difficult n was supposed to have a phone appointment today, they haven't called yet, there's a bully in his admin and the whole thing is making the mental health in my home bad, as got yelled at for half an hour about it when urging boyfriend to turn phone off n order groceries for elderly from Walmart as its extremely cold, we're unwell and one of us needs to shovel snow that fell early yesterday, as boyfriend has not gotten out of his robe for 2 days its probably on my shoulders, also raising a teen with her first boyfriend now, and its financially hard, no contact with extended family and my daughter now has the weirdest health concern?, we were going to go out for FRENCH TOAST, instead I'm living on Oreas, Chips and the possibility of ramen w an egg n grated carrot, you wouldn't think so but its hard, and its really hard for me to trust the Ontario health care system having been cuffed n put in restraints for defending my father's rights to good healthcare and notifying elder abuse and getting violated by my boyfriend, I've put it behind me but still have to vouch for everyone else's rights n fight the cold walking or on the bus, fortunately no SI today, rescued by Hobbit ambiance n colouring for mental health, thank you if you help, it means a lot, all my love, and some support if you want to drop a hard day here, thank you

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