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Nothing Will Go As Planned. And That’s a Good Thing.

A lot of anxiety comes from trying to predict how life is supposed to unfold. We create expectations about the future, and when reality doesn’t match them, we feel disappointed, stressed, or out of control. But the truth is that life rarely follows a fixed plan. Many of the most meaningful experiences come from things we didn’t expect or even tried to avoid. When you loosen your grip on expectations and focus more on taking action in the present, you create space for growth, learning, and opportunities you couldn’t have planned for.

What is something in your life that didn’t go as planned but turned out better than you expected?

If you want to learn more about this, check out my video by clicking on one of the links below.

www.instagram.com/thomas_of_copenhagen

www.tiktok.com/@thomas_of_copenhagen

~ Thanks to all. Thanks for all. ~

#MentalHealth #MentalHealth #Depression #Anxiety #BipolarDisorder #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Addiction #dissociativedisorders #ObsessiveCompulsiveDisorder #ADHD #Fibromyalgia #EhlersDanlosSyndrome #PTSD #Cancer #RareDisease #Disability #Autism #Diabetes #EatingDisorders #ChronicIllness #ChronicPain #RheumatoidArthritis #Suicide #MightyTogether

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The Battle for her Crown

They're once was a girl who avoided her pain

she looked in the mirror with such disdain

her heart feels numb and body weak

she slowly falling apart and doesn't know where to seek

The help That she needs feel so far away

Even though it's within her almost clear is day

the struggle is real there's no doubt about that

how can she relieve the rift between herself and the "her" that she needs back.

The substance called crack that promised to be there and take the pain away

When all it did was ruin her day, her week,her year, her life as a whole

only to take over and control; to strip her of what she should have consoled

that little girl screaming inside for help wishing someone would come save her from this hell

But no one comes to her side to rescue her to save her from herself

she's left in pieces of shame guilt and remorse
To put herself back together with no Force

To hold her down or have her back.She's on her own to get herself back

From the pain and sorrow that holds her down. Where is her Crown?

The one that reminds her of her strength, importance and worth on this Earth

So she will stand tall and straighten her Crown in order to fight what brings her down

She will free herself from the hell within. The fire that's been extinguished will ignite and she will win

The battle. The battle between who she was and is..... With a grin.

BigmommaJ
#BattleWithin #MentalHealth #Addiction #selfempowerment #YouGotThis

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Worrying doesn’t fix tomorrow.

Worry often feels productive, but it rarely leads to solutions. Instead, it keeps your mind focused on problems that haven’t happened yet while taking your attention away from what you can actually influence right now. When you shift your focus back to the present moment and ask what is within your control, you reduce anxiety and create a sense of calm. The goal is not to eliminate thinking about the future, but to stop letting it take away your peace in the present.

What is something you’ve been worrying about that you can’t actually control right now?

Also, if you're going through a tough time right now, I want you to know that I post daily mental health videos about how to deal with painful thoughts. So if you or anyone you know is struggling and wants help, click on one of the links below or write me if you have any questions you want me to answer:

www.instagram.com/thomas_of_copenhagen

www.tiktok.com/@thomas_of_copenhagen

~ Thanks to all. Thanks for all. ~

#MentalHealth #MentalHealth #Depression #Anxiety #BipolarDisorder #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Addiction #dissociativedisorders #ObsessiveCompulsiveDisorder #ADHD #Fibromyalgia #EhlersDanlosSyndrome #PTSD #Cancer #RareDisease #Disability #Autism #Diabetes #EatingDisorders #ChronicIllness #ChronicPain #RheumatoidArthritis #Suicide #MightyTogether

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How to Stop Being Afraid of Making Mistakes

Fear of making mistakes is one of the biggest reasons people stay stuck. When you avoid mistakes, you also avoid growth, experience, and confidence. The truth is, everyone around you is just as unsure and afraid of being judged as you are. Progress doesn’t come from being perfect. It comes from taking action, learning, and adjusting along the way.

What is something you’ve been avoiding because you’re afraid of messing it up?

If you want to learn more about this, check out my video by clicking on one of the links below.

www.instagram.com/thomas_of_copenhagen

www.tiktok.com/@thomas_of_copenhagen

~ Thanks to all. Thanks for all. ~

#MentalHealth #MentalHealth #Depression #Anxiety #BipolarDisorder #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Addiction #dissociativedisorders #ObsessiveCompulsiveDisorder #ADHD #Fibromyalgia #EhlersDanlosSyndrome #PTSD #Cancer #RareDisease #Disability #Autism #Diabetes #EatingDisorders #ChronicIllness #ChronicPain #RheumatoidArthritis #Suicide #MightyTogether

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Taking Your Power Back: Reclaiming Yourself from Addiction and Mental Health By BigmommaJ

There comes a moment—quiet, almost unnoticeable at first—when something begins to shift.

Not everything. Not all at once.
But enough.

Enough to recognize that the life being survived is not the life meant to be lived.

For individuals navigating addiction and mental health challenges, “taking power back” is not a motivational phrase. It is not a single breakthrough moment.

It is a process of reclaiming self—piece by piece.

What Addiction and Mental Illness Take

Addiction does not only involve substances—it impacts identity.

Mental illness does not only affect mood—it distorts thinking, self-worth, and the ability to trust internal judgment.

Together, they create a cycle:

*Self-doubt

*Emotional instability

*Shame

*Escapism

*Regret

Research from the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health confirms that substance use disorders frequently co-occur with mental health conditions, reinforcing patterns of emotional dysregulation and negative self-concept (CAMH, 2023).

Over time, individuals can lose connection with who they are. Internal narratives become dominated by criticism, and self-trust begins to erode. Trauma—particularly early and repeated trauma—further intensifies this cycle, increasing vulnerability to both addiction and mental health challenges (Public Health Agency of Canada, 2020).

What “Taking Power Back” Actually Means

Taking power back does not mean controlling everything.

It means learning where control truly exists.

Within trauma-informed practice, power is defined as the ability to exercise awareness, choice, and intentional response—not perfection or dominance (SAMHSA, 2014).

It can look like:

*Choosing not to engage with shame-based thinking

*Setting boundaries, even when discomfort arises

*Acknowledging triggers instead of avoiding them

*Taking accountability without becoming consumed by guilt

*Showing up consistently, even on difficult days

The Mental Health Commission of Canada emphasizes that recovery is nonlinear and rooted in self-determination and hope (MHCC, 2015).

Power is not perfection.
Power is awareness.
Power is choice.

The Internal Battle No One Sees

Recovery is not linear—and mental health does not stabilize simply through intention.

There are still moments when:

*Thoughts become overwhelming

*Emotions feel unmanageable

*Old patterns attempt to resurface

Clinically, this reflects ongoing challenges with cognitive distortions and emotional regulation, particularly in trauma-related conditions and disorders such as borderline personality disorder (American Psychiatric Association, 2022).

Evidence-based approaches such as Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) emphasize the importance of creating a pause between emotion and action (Linehan, 2015).

That pause—that space between feeling and reacting—is where change begins.

It is also where power is reclaimed.

Relearning Trust in Self

One of the most difficult aspects of recovery is rebuilding self-trust.

Repeated cycles of relapse, self-doubt, or perceived failure can fracture confidence in personal decision-making.

Rebuilding trust requires consistency:

*Following through on small commitments

*Practicing honesty, even when uncomfortable

*Engaging in behaviours that align with values

The Canadian Centre on Substance Use and Addiction identifies internal resources such as self-efficacy and resilience as key components of recovery capital—critical for sustaining long-term change (CCSA, 2020).

Trust is not rebuilt through intention alone.

It is rebuilt through action.

From Surviving to Reclaiming

For many, survival mode becomes the default.

And survival mode serves a purpose—it protects.

But it does not allow space for growth.

Taking power back means shifting from:

*Surviving → Intentional living

*Reacting → Responding

*Avoiding → Facing

*Numbing → Feeling

Trauma-informed frameworks highlight that emotional processing—not avoidance—is central to healing (Herman, 2015).

And feeling is difficult.
But feeling is where healing begins.

A Grounded Reflection
Addiction and mental health struggles can create the belief that identity is permanently tied to suffering.

That the patterns will always return.

That change is temporary.

However, trauma-informed and recovery-oriented perspectives challenge this belief.

Experiences shape individuals—but they do not define them.

Recovery is built through repeated, intentional choices that gradually reshape identity, behaviour, and belief systems.

Each moment of awareness.
Each interrupted pattern.
Each decision to respond differently.

These are not small victories.

They are evidence of change.

A Call to Those Still in the Fight

For those currently navigating addiction and mental health challenges, power may feel out of reach.

But research and clinical practice consistently demonstrate that change begins with small, intentional steps.

This can include:

*Making one supportive choice each day

*Reaching out for connection or professional support

*Practicing grounding during distress

*Challenging negative internal narratives

Accessible supports such as Wellness Together Canada provide free, confidential mental health services across the country (Government of Canada, 2023).

Power is not found in having everything figured out.
It is found in choosing—moment by moment—not to give up.

Closing

Taking power back is not a destination.

It is a daily, deliberate process.
Some days will feel manageable.
Others will feel overwhelming.
But every time a different choice is made—over old patterns, over internalized shame, over automatic reactions—something shifts.

Power is not lost permanently.

It can be rebuilt.

One decision at a time.

BigmommaJ
#resilience #MentalHealth #reclaimingyourpower
#BeYourself

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