Complex Post-traumatic Stress Disorder

I need to cut my canvases and put them https://away.I honestly don't want to but it is necessary for me to keep https://space.I feel too confined and too exposed now.is that a thing?

How do you feel after those you admired, keep hurting others?
That, keep hurting you, on purpose and intentionally sabotaging your spirit?

How do "healthy" people deal with this?
Do you pause, join in or question it?
Do you judge or ask the targeted person for clarity?
Do you gang up on them with others or single yourself out?
Or do you ignore, turn face and pretend, invalidating the targeted person even more?
Where do others draw the line?
Seriously asking?

Assumptions about others, that turn into gossip and slander, are weak.
I find, offensively gross and https://intolerant.They show, the messangers true colors and character flaws, their own projections and faults.
I often wondered, do they understand this or are they truly, that blind and unaware?

I need to cut my canvases and put them https://away.I honestly don't want to but it is necessary for me to keep https://space.I feel too confined and too exposed now.is that a thing?

How do you feel after those you admired, keep hurting others?
That, keep hurting you, on purpose and intentionally sabotaging your spirit?

How do "healthy" people deal with this?
Do you pause, join in or question it?
Do you judge or ask the targeted person for clarity?
Do you gang up on them with others or single yourself out?
Or do you ignore, turn face and pretend, invalidating the targeted person even more?
Where do others draw the line?
Seriously asking?

Assumptions about others, that turn into gossip and slander, are weak.
I find, offensively gross and https://intolerant.They show, the messangers true colors and character flaws, their own projections and faults.
I often wondered, do they understand this or are they truly, that blind and unaware?

The funny and ironic thing is, he is cheap but I am https://frugal.I will go without and he spends on himself, saying I buy cheap https://stuff.I buy https://necessity.He will not invest in his house and tells everyone I ruined https://it.He wont help me fix it, at https://all.But tells them, its https://me.Im ungrateful because I want more, worked and gave everything to us, I wanted a better https://future.And in https://writing.Thats when it became a https://problem.A will, my name on the house and reassurance for William.They, didnt want https://us.She didnt want me.
I wanted other, people, over us, all his friends , his family.His, not us, did not and uses, the house, as a excuse.it will be done, by https://me.He was doing this years before and now Im ruined, https://financially.That was his https://plan.He doesn't believe he did a thing wrong, still.

The funny and ironic thing is, he is cheap but I am https://frugal.I will go without and he spends on himself, saying I buy cheap https://stuff.I buy https://necessity.He will not invest in his house and tells everyone I ruined https://it.He wont help me fix it, at https://all.But tells them, its https://me.Im ungrateful because I want more, worked and gave everything to us, I wanted a better https://future.And in https://writing.Thats when it became a https://problem.A will, my name on the house and reassurance for William.They, didnt want https://us.She didnt want me.
I wanted other, people, over us, all his friends , his family.His, not us, did not and uses, the house, as a excuse.it will be done, by https://me.He was doing this years before and now Im ruined, https://financially.That was his https://plan.He doesn't believe he did a thing wrong, still.

I sneezed and it has been five https://days.Three times, loss control,not bladder control and could not get to the standing position and each time I was alone https://here.That scared me, my situation, my health issues are not going https://away.If I dont keep moving, I will get https://worse.I was dancing for three hours, every week, moving, flexible and strong, now, sedatary and weak again. Every winter, my baseline flops, fck https://that.This time, it hurts a hundred times more. I am not here, only,to make his, life https://easier.I have spent my entire adult life running from them, and Im tired. I am going to beable to make my own.im tired and over adults being https://cruel.Im sad they listened to them, sad they never bothered with getting to know me, hurt they excluded me but not https://surprised.Ive lived it, not new or any, different from my https://upbringing.The only difference is, it was fully intentional and meant, to hurt me. Intention vs https://impact.Look it https://up.Accountability is not apoligizing or speaking outloud of the hurt, it is changing the conditions, environment and the https://behavior.I did, I have.They, did not.so I, removed myself.They, still, have the same https://issues.I want more for myself and I will beable to build better.im better than this mediocre level https://life.I wanted him but he never wanted https://me.I wont settle now and Im ashamed I believed him and his family, they will never be forthcoming or engaging towards https://me.I was wrong to expose the https://truth.I was wrong in questioning my role and I won't be doing that again.my role, is for me, to be here, for, my son and the https://animals.There is no extended family or https://friends.There are no obligations or https://commitments.They chose that, not https://me.I am mearly responding to what https://was.I was never integrated, by his, choice, not https://mine.I stood by him, his choice to never wanting traditions or involving others. I mourn not telling, not forcing the conversations but now, nope, no loss.no surprise or loss, because it was never a relationship with them, https://ever.I went, showed up, and watched, enough, to know, Im not valued, respected or https://needed.No issues left, to be resolved.
Move on and grow from, people who mock, gossip and belittle me? No, I cant learn from people who never see their own reflection. I would be careful who you admire, why your own reflection seems Foggy at times.it is due to the falsehoods and lies, that surround https://you.The scheming and plotting around https://you.The backstabbing and false narratives thrown around your https://spirit.Thats the veil of betrayal, slander and hearsay, that cover a name.it is damaging, irreversible and a fact, of my life. The amount, one must go through, to ruin, anothers https://spirit.I will never understand, support or orchestrate.

It takes a special type of dysfunction, to believe there's nothing wrong, with ganging up on person, to fight someone elses marital https://issues.To recruit people, for ANY reason, it is sick and https://deranged.They need more help, than I received.

I sneezed and it has been five https://days.Three times, loss control,not bladder control and could not get to the standing position and each time I was alone https://here.That scared me, my situation, my health issues are not going https://away.If I dont keep moving, I will get https://worse.I was dancing for three hours, every week, moving, flexible and strong, now, sedatary and weak again. Every winter, my baseline flops, fck https://that.This time, it hurts a hundred times more. I am not here, only,to make his, life https://easier.I have spent my entire adult life running from them, and Im tired. I am going to beable to make my own.im tired and over adults being https://cruel.Im sad they listened to them, sad they never bothered with getting to know me, hurt they excluded me but not https://surprised.Ive lived it, not new or any, different from my https://upbringing.The only difference is, it was fully intentional and meant, to hurt me. Intention vs https://impact.Look it https://up.Accountability is not apoligizing or speaking outloud of the hurt, it is changing the conditions, environment and the https://behavior.I did, I have.They, did not.so I, removed myself.They, still, have the same https://issues.I want more for myself and I will beable to build better.im better than this mediocre level https://life.I wanted him but he never wanted https://me.I wont settle now and Im ashamed I believed him and his family, they will never be forthcoming or engaging towards https://me.I was wrong to expose the https://truth.I was wrong in questioning my role and I won't be doing that again.my role, is for me, to be here, for, my son and the https://animals.There is no extended family or https://friends.There are no obligations or https://commitments.They chose that, not https://me.I am mearly responding to what https://was.I was never integrated, by his, choice, not https://mine.I stood by him, his choice to never wanting traditions or involving others. I mourn not telling, not forcing the conversations but now, nope, no loss.no surprise or loss, because it was never a relationship with them, https://ever.I went, showed up, and watched, enough, to know, Im not valued, respected or https://needed.No issues left, to be resolved.
Move on and grow from, people who mock, gossip and belittle me? No, I cant learn from people who never see their own reflection. I would be careful who you admire, why your own reflection seems Foggy at times.it is due to the falsehoods and lies, that surround https://you.The scheming and plotting around https://you.The backstabbing and false narratives thrown around your https://spirit.Thats the veil of betrayal, slander and hearsay, that cover a name.it is damaging, irreversible and a fact, of my life. The amount, one must go through, to ruin, anothers https://spirit.I will never understand, support or orchestrate.

It takes a special type of dysfunction, to believe there's nothing wrong, with ganging up on person, to fight someone elses marital https://issues.To recruit people, for ANY reason, it is sick and https://deranged.They need more help, than I received.