DE

Text ed crazy and I didn't mean to to say all that stuff but my mind and my fingers just kind of take up on their own I hope I didn't scare anyone kind of scared myself but I'm better now but my fingers just still can't talk with us worth anything like a huge on my stupid cell phone my fingers just touch barely go over it something and it'll hit a key it's not the right one but I'm doing better right now I'm not I just hyper and we're trying to sleep right now and again I'm sorry and I don't know how to stop the fingers from topping all the stuff that I didn't mean does anyone else have that problem just typing and it won't the wrong letters come up and it doesn't say what you want just it was just doubled me too you see it didn't do it either so if y'all see this I apologize for the earlier crazy texting and I hope everything help it everybody knows that I'm okay now I really am thank you for listening bye #ocdbipolar 2,general a anxiety, get Schitzo effective f effective disorder , the effective disorder, hallucinations of all kinds and delusions are still running around in my mind and I'm doing better than I was in the hospital just to have occasional relapses but I'm doing my best to overcome it I don't want to go back in the hospital please keep me in prayers thank you ( I may still be having side effects from OTC treatment in hoping that it'll go away soon thank you) #erlinePersonalityDisorderBPD #DE ,,oS,RA arthritis, stomach issues,a r dependent psychological disorder pendency. Fears of being abandoned and left with nobody to talk to or help take care of me when I can't and nobody to love me. Vertigo which I am
battleingy right now. Poor self image. And putting those feet in mouth and just move them around. The mouth works before the brain does. # # foot and mouth disease. Brain fog
Chatty Cathy rides again)

This is my 1st post & I have to tell all of you that I'm overwhelmed by all of you amazing people. Your strength, courage & compassion are the most beautiful thing I've seen in a long time. I am so happy to have found the Mighty. I think it will change my life. It's wonderful to know "it" can be done. Thank you. MKJ

Build
Brick by Brick;
insurmountable walls.
The dust of freedom?
long gone.
My brain is the wall,
My lenguage the defense
and - my eyes are
the royals.

This is my first poem which is actually a few years old now and someone told me ny poems can't be interpreted. I agree, I was too scared someone could figure out what was wrong in my head that I wrote way to blurred.

But in my opinion this one is the simplest. It's about the idiom "the eyes are the mirror of the soul" and the me in the story is hiding her eyes because she is too scared too show her soul...there couls be someone understanding or misunderstanding. I do not know what is worse. "Language is the defence" because she is a sarcastic bitch too not get hurt. Pretty easy actually.

But there is the point: She build a insurmountable wall. It is insurmountable for other but also for her. Even if she would love to socialise...she just can't.

The text her is a mess..I hope at least a part is understandable. There a lot of questionable thoughts in my head right now.

#myheadisamess #DE #Depression #Depression #mentalhealthawareness #Poetry #Poem

i had a teacher that loved calling me up to the front to "talk with me" she starts talking and starts riseing her voice louder until the class stops talking and they all turn and look at me. forgetting an assinment even a small paper worth nothing was a huge deal and it required that i get belittled and shamed in front of the class. im so dissapointed in you josh. you can do better then this. i dont know what to do with you anymore. whats the point in me trying to get through to you. do you even listen when i talk or does it just go in one ear and out the other. why do i even bother. the whole time the class was just looking on watching me get scolded. I never had any friends in that class no one wanted to even talk to me. if it werent for my friends at recess i honestly think i would have killed myself. i had massive anxiety when ever i was in the class. i hated going to school i had to calm myself down just to walk in the class room and when i got home and did all my homework is when my anxiety finally stopped. but right at bed time i was restless with worry. whats everything that could go wrong. it would all just swirl until i came up with something to say to the teacher something to preemptively protect myself when it eventually happened. she expected absolute perfection this is your good copy there are spelling mistakes and grammar issues fix it when i would but id miss something so then the shameing started. every day id endure that and even when i did my best work and figured this time she cant say anything. it would happen i broke i tried getting angry and yelling telling her off it only got me smashed down harder. the the next logical thing was to just give up wats the point in trying its never good enough. why does it matter im just going to get in trouble anyway. but i hate her i honestly do. because this week i really thought about why when someone even a good friend gave me a critisism i would get so angry and upset and sometimes even cry alone when they said something rude, degading or critisising. its because I feel im not good enough. im never right. i do what others want to do and dont live myself because somehow they know how to live survive and be happy and i dont im not good enough to figure that out. and when i express my mind or individualism i get laughed at crtisised or feel that im being stupid then cue depression and anxoety suisidal thoughts and feelings. im not going to get a job because i have a beard. because i dont look presentable because i have long hair. because my face isnt clear of acme because i cant speak clearly and openly or because i dont day the right words or have the right body language or represent myself properly. because im not good enough to deserve a job, a girlfriend or close relationships. it all started with that class feeling like no matter what i did or said i could change or fix my situation i couldnt be good enough even if i tried to be. #Abuse #trama #PTSD #Abusive #Anxiety #Suicide #DE

#MentalHealth

Show this to a doctor and ask for the comments.

An abscess or toothache can make you suffer,
But chronic pain? its like no other,
The tooth you can pull, to cure your pain,
But our pains hit you, again and again,
How to describe, what we suffer daily,
We can’t its impossible, so please don’t ask me,
On the outside we look like, normal people,
But on the inside, we are burning, like molten treacle,
A forest fire, burns within,
Symptoms so varied, they won’t give in,
This I’m afraid, is our daily struggle,
It affects your brain, and makes you, all muddled,
To explain what we are feeling, is impossible,
Its different each day, severe and terrible,
If you don’t suffer, with pain like we do,
You won’t understand, what we are going through,
Not that we want you, to be as we are,
Wishing pain on another, is taking it too far,
Image, the worst pain, you’ve had in your life,
Then combine it, with someone, stabbing you, with a hot knife,
Our pains are relentless, a constant companion,
Description impossible, there is no comparison. #Poetry #ChronicPain #Depression #hernia

I practice my yoga breathing over the holidays!!!!! It's all in the breath!!!!!!

#MightyPoets

Mind Racing,

Unstoppable,

Uncontrollable.

At the end,I am tired.

But,

I am not willing to give in,

I am #beyondworth ,

I am unique,

I am the only "me" in this world.

I want to move on.

I want to be unstoppable,

To roar to the world,

To show the world

Who I am.

But,

Depression has stopped me

From being me.

But,

I knowDepression,

Not unstoppable,

Not uncontrollable.

Stop, #DE .