In The Meantime
In The Meantime
#SpokenWord poem I wrote. Titled:
"You are the Light"
For anyone feeling beat up and discouraged in this world.
Noone ever tells you how hard life really is.
They fill your head with premeditated worries about neverending bills and jobs you will hate
They tell you to get used to being tired and forget about the plans that you made
They say growing up is all about being honest while learning how to be fake.
They don't tell you about the thoughts you think when you come home at night and throw your hands in the sink
Washing your hands and face of today's lost dreams,
You stand crying for a minute because you can't help but think
while the forbidden tears roll down your cheeks
About how hard life really is.
It's more than what they told us. Atleast it is for me.
Because with the cards that I was dealt i had no choice but to see,
the dark side of this world before it ever saw me.
And I can't be the only one that seen.
There's more to this then what they say
It's feeling numb but knowing pain
It's constant guilt and endless shame
It's dark thoughts on sunny days
It's feeling lost when you know the way
It's wanting to speak with no words to say
It's wanting to forgive but your hearts full of hate
It's wanting to forget but your minds full of rage
It's dreaming of being free from a life time of pain
It's a constant game
Of you against yourself
And you against the world
An invisible war that you can never be prepared for
Because they can't ever put it into words about how hard life really is
Because it's losing hope when hopes all you had
It's one step forward two steps back
It's getting ahead just to get caught in a trap
So life can catch you quicker and take all that you have
Faster than if you had stayed in the back
Because that's the way life really is
You've never been ahead, you're just on a different path
And I'm not being selfish but this is all that I have
To offer to those who have been caught in this same trap
Who have been lost and who have been afraid and who have been speechless and been ashamed
If it means nothing to noone except for you I want you to know
that it's okay. Just let go
But they don't tell you THAT that much do they?
They leave out the fact that you have fought and fought and fought and though you are wounded, you are still standing
They leave out the fact that you would not have been taught life's greatest lessons without this constant changing
They forgot to mention that behind every dark corner there is a light that's STILL gleaming,
Waiting to be noticed to remind you to never stop dreaming
Never stop believing,
because even though this world can be deceiving do not believe that your life has no meaning
Because it does
You are that light.
You are the very flickering flame that someone needs
You are the voice that speaks to a soul in need,
You are the light
You are the hand that holds a broken piece to someones heart that's needing peace
You are the smile that changes a persons day, you are the friendly face that pauses the pain
You ARE the light
You are the eyes that see the purpose in others when they can't seem to see
You are the energy it takes to help them believe that just like you, you have got to believe
That you ARE the light
You are the phone call that could save a persons life
You are the friend that could pull out the knife - in the back of someone who's losing sight
of life's greatest purpose because they've been too afraid to fight
The battle against what the world wants us to believe is right
So if you feel like your losing your purpose I hope to God that you heard this
Because you are most certainly worth it no matter how bad that you're hurting
I hope you know your important, I hope you know that you're loved
I hope you know that you're not alone and that you are always enough
I hope you know that you're strong, I hope you know that you got this
I hope you remember all the battles that you won and you fight this
I hope you stay with me, and that you never forget that you are that light.
And most importantly I hope you learn to love your life.
Wondering how do I
How do I hide the pain from my friends.... without hiding a part of myself.
How do I hide the pain from my friends....
or ending up all by myself.
How do I show my friends,
or pushing them away,
because I was thinking only about myself,
or maybe it was just about the pain...
What to do with this body
What do you say when you are given this body
What do you think when it doesn't work
What do you do when you have all this hopes and dreams but your body keeps getting in the way
Time after time it keeps interfering as if it had its own plans, not caring about what you had in mind
What do you do
What do you think
What do you say when your body won't let you be yourself
I wish you never met me
The Severance - a poem
My happiness comes in waves,
Spiraling, spiking, and fading away.
If only true happiness wasn't just a dream,
And if my depression wasn't worse than it seems.
I am so sick of starting new,
Especially after all I have been through.
The sadness and the fear causing me to spiral down,
But I am no longer going to hide my frown.
As one day I will succeed, I will get better,
Whether or not it takes forever.
I will not give up, nor will I give in,
I am determined to let my happiness win.
Life may be bleak now, but I will fight for the good to replace the bad,
I refuse to give in to being sad.