Relapse
TW: SH
I fucking relapsed… 4 years went down the fucking drain… went and texted the first person I could trust and she was upset with me… I tried, I really did… I tried distracting myself, but nothing worked for long…I just kept crying and kept repeating “I’m sorry”, not sure who I was apologizing to 😞
I really did try! I’ve had very strong urges and stuff while my fiancé has been gone (he’s currently in AIT portion of OSUT, has 5 weeks left). And I like being honest with him, we’re gonna be getting married when we bring him home, and I’m happy about that. It doesn’t help that I could possibly have Borderline Personality Disorder or some PD with dependent traits (or possibly both)…