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    Depression and alcohol and stuff

    Has anyone here given up drinking and seen a big improvement on their depression? That’s my main question.

    I have 2-3 glasses of wine each night. I can go without it, in fact I occasionally make a point of taking a month off to make sure I can. But I really enjoy wine. It is the only way I can relax. It brings me joy. I look forward to it. But my therapist thinks that if I go without for three months it is possible that it will really help my depression and irritability. If I knew for sure it would help, I think I could give it up. I’m still in the “thinking about maybe trying it” stage.

    I am just so tired. Therapy hasn’t helped. Medication either. Is it hormonal? Chemical? Is my marriage causing my depression or visa-versa? I don’t know if I’m deeply in love or resentful/hateful. I feel like I’m crazy and can’t keep whining to my support system.

    I come here when I’m struggling because you understand but it is triggering because so many of us are in so much pain.

    Have any of you really gotten to the bottom of it? Is there hope? #Depression #Alcohol #alone #Relationships #Hope

    5 people are talking about this
    Community Voices

    Depression post, trauma, and trying to get better

    Today I’m trying to take ahold of what I can control in my life. Even though I struggle with severe #Depression and #Anxiety I try and do what I can to make my life as #normal as possible. Some days aren’t always so bad and I can function okay and pretty normally despite having #suicidal thoughts. Other times I have to remind myself it’s the little #victories are a huge win. Doing a load of laundry. Splashing my face with cold water and putting on deodorant and some perfume as just getting ready for the day. I’m just trying to take it one step at a time.

    I was in some pretty bad and abusive relationships. #Drug use, #Alcohol , #DomesticViolence . My last relationship I stayed with him for so long because I felt like I was damaged goods. He gave me #herpes and I felt like my life was over. I was no longer able to be “normal”, date normally ever again. I was as good as rotten fruit, even though I only had 3 boyfriends my whole life and never had any one night stands. So I stayed, even through the manipulation, the lies, the constant verbal, emotional, and physical abuse that I was receiving daily. Why did I deserve better? Why would anyone, think anything of me besides just being damaged and just bad baggage? I didn’t deserve it, hell I was such a disappointment to myself let alone I’m sure being a disappointment to my family. I was so exhausted, so depressed, so I stayed and ignored the very obvious red flags. He even had a previous domestic charge on him from a prior relationship. He even told me in such a rage later on that he did punch her when he swore up and down he didn’t. He would constantly yell at me on my lunch breaks that I was cheating on him with my coworkers. One time when I didn’t text him back within two minutes, I was the bad guy. Getting called every name in the book, because I deserved it. He would constantly kick me, choke me, punch me in the face, spit on me, throw water on me, pull my hair, grab me so I wasn’t able to leave. Grab my phone and keys so I couldn’t call or leave on my own free will. He used to do MMA for 10+ years. One time he kicked me in my leg so hard I couldn’t walk normally for a week. He’s broken my ankle, causing me to be in crutches. Chocked me so hard the blood vessels in my eye burst. I always had bruises on my body. Yet I stayed. I wanted to die.

    I never told anyone anything until I got into therapy just a few months ago. It wasn’t until my ex screamed at me for hours about how he was going to kill me, bash my head into various objects. I finally grabbed the valuables I had, my dog, and I left when he was at work.

    So now I’m in a safe place, away from him. I cut off all communication. Deleted his photos and am donating or throwing out anything we shared together. However I’m stuck with these feelings of #Guilt , #Shame and #anger . I wish I wasn’t scarred from all this but I am. I wish I could date again normally but idk that’s going to take a lot of time. I want to tell him nasty things he told me to get back at him. I’m upset at myself for not leaving when I so should have. I’m trying to deal with these emotions and trauma. So anyways I’m just sitting here folding my laundry and cleaning out my closet because so far that’s what I have control over. I’m still incredibly suicidal because I feel like I can’t be normal or date normally so the future is scary. I feel better finally and I’m glad I left. I’m just now trying to get out of this flight of fight stage, trying to better myself and maybe someday in the future someone will understand. Until then I have my loving mom my dog and my lizard. Onto my next load of laundry.
    #relationship

    17 people are talking about this
    Community Voices

    Physical symptoms of panic attacks and general anxiety. Then random ranting toward the end. 5-28-22 @ 4:48pm in Korey's building. On his birthday.

    <p>Physical symptoms of <a href="https://themighty.com/topic/panic-attacks/?label=panic attacks" class="tm-embed-link  tm-autolink health-map" data-id="5b23cea700553f33fe999927" data-name="panic attacks" title="panic attacks" target="_blank">panic attacks</a> and general <a href="https://themighty.com/topic/anxiety/?label=anxiety" class="tm-embed-link  tm-autolink health-map" data-id="5b23ce5f00553f33fe98d1b4" data-name="anxiety" title="anxiety" target="_blank">anxiety</a>. Then random ranting toward the end. 5-28-22 @ 4:48pm in Korey's building. On his birthday.</p>
    2 people are talking about this
    Community Voices

    #CrohnsDisease stinks - looking for pain management tips!

    Dealing with a 6 month bout of severe peripheral arthritis and cannot get my pain under control. Any tips for chronic pain management as I try to taper off prednisone? Turning to #Alcohol and that’s probably not so smart…

    2 people are talking about this
    Community Voices

    Migraine and alcohol 🍺

    <p><a href="https://themighty.com/topic/migraine/?label=Migraine" class="tm-embed-link  tm-autolink health-map" data-id="5b23ce9c00553f33fe997c0a" data-name="Migraine" title="Migraine" target="_blank">Migraine</a> and alcohol 🍺</p>
    5 people are talking about this
    Community Voices

    Last night things came to a head

    Last night I went out and got blind drunk, made an absolute show of myself on social media, and sent unkind messages to someone who didn’t particularly deserve it.

    I’ve been using alcohol as a crutch for my mental health but the reality is that it’s actually causing me more problems than helping. I spent a fortune and don’t remember half of my actions.

    I’ve been burying my struggles recently to be strong for others. This morning I’ve realised that I cannot continue this way in life, otherwise I’ll never be able to manage my ongoing depression and anxiety.

    Today I am quitting alcohol. I just hope I can stick to it this time.

    #MentalHealth #Alcohol #Sobriety

    30 people are talking about this
    Community Voices
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    Community Voices

    Even my friends miss the drunk me! #Alcohol #ChronicPain #MS #PeripheralNeuropathy

    Hey everyone, the other day i went to my best friends house, we hadn't seen eachother in a few months and my other 2 (covid free) friends were there too. When i started to drink originally it made my severe anxiety disappear, i could talk to anyone and was a bright character (how i should be without this crippling thing) , i stopped drinking so much due to health then my chronic pain started around 2 and a half years ago, alcohol suppressed my nervous system aka stopped my nerves firing off bad/irregular signals so much, i could "sleep more" well more like pass out but after no sleep for days that was and unfortunately still is the only solid relief especially when in excruciating pain, i guess i don't have the right reaction to my pain, whatever that means, as i can still smile and force myself to engage so people assume I'm fine and it cant be that bad. When in reality my body is on fire and shooting off all over!! Anyway 2 weeks ago my friends collectively said the missed "the fun drunk me" and how i have no energy these days, i miss drunk/tipsy me too(i only drink ciders on occasion not spirits now) they said i always look so sad now and they miss when we i would drink and i would be dancing and singing and cracking jokes etc. I relapsed last week and drank spirits, my pain is still not under control and I'm starting to feel like this is going to be my reality for however long i have left. It takes the right doctor to hear your pain when they can't see it, Pain everywhere everyday, even though my friends know its bad for me they know that i would drink not really for drunkness but for pain relief especially after they would witness me rolling around in bed,then having a complete body spasm or seizure or throwing up dripping in sweat, Im starting tk feel like a failure again by giving in, buy lawd have mercy this is the worst pain I've ever felt and i cant take it much longer, day 2 no sleep, #Pain #Alcohol #Life #sad #lost #Relapse #MS #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder

    14 people are talking about this
    Community Voices

    Addiction creeping up

    Hey everyone. So I’ve been battling the addiction that is alcohol. It took me through hell and back. In the past year, since my suicide attempt last February, I’ve improved tremendously. Problem is...and as always, on December 26, I relapse and got drunk at my dads gf 60th party. It wasn’t pretty, not at all.

    I figured I had been ok, since no one had said anything, until two days ago. What I was told, makes me want to hide under a rock and never leave it, and make sure that rock is in Mars.

    Now obviously I’ve had to face my father, his business partner, and it hasn’t been easy. Since that day I haven’t drank, but the stressors are at an all time high. All I want to do is drink myself stupid, and we’ll...you know.

    I was thinking, how do people go about getting someone they can call, and talk? I already have a counselor, a psychiatrist, but obviously I can’t call them daily. So I was thinking if anyone knew on here how to go about being able to get a sponsor to talk to.

    Thanks. #Alcohol #AlcoholDependence #Depression #ADHD #Suicide

    11 people are talking about this