community

FYI: it IS a bad thing to be stressed because of EVERY aspect of living: old car with major mechanical issues; homework: math - need I say more; family issues; work tension: trying to ‘work’ with a ministry leader who has absolutely no concept of boundaries. All of the above are ever present situations I have been dealing with during the past few months, and I am OVER IT despite seeing a counselor twice a month. 😵‍💫!

Prayers appreciated. Thank you.

Yesterday, I shared how my mornings go. Today I will elaborate on why "Every Morning" is so very exhausting.

I've been in the mental hospital more times than I would like to admit. However before that, I went to college majoring in biology and neuroscience. I wanted to understand my chronic issues and "fix me".

Unfortunately, I did not find for what I was looking. Going through several different specialists, I found some diagnosis (treatment resistant depression, generalized anxiety disorder, a circadian rhythm disorder, sleep apnea mixed in with a bit of obsessive compulsive disorder and perfectionism).

I never found a medication or medication combination that revolutionized my life. I found many coping mechanisms that helped like medication, a proper diet, journaling, blue light therapy, talk therapy, yoga, dance, deep breathing techniques, transcranial magnetic stimulation therapy (TMS), acupuncture, Chinese herbs, teas and lately, homeopathy.

However, as I alluded to earlier life happens and you are left flat broke (literally), unable to pay for most of these services. For example, due to my mental health, I had to leave graduate school and move in with my parents. My business failed, and at this point no one will hire me. My ex-husband left because he couldn't support us (along with a mental breakdown of his own). So, I am left alone, depressed, anxious, unemployed, living with my parents, picking up the pieces fighting the strong urge to just give up. Did I mention I my mornings are actually afternoons? (More on that later.)

Yes, this is officially a "Cry Me a River" post. However, that's why I joined this platform. I officially have no one to really talk to or in my case 'vent'. However, I think that is why we are all here. Am I right? Let's get all of our problems out in the open and support each other?

Well, I definitely hope that is the case because most 'normal people' look at me, when they hear my story and say, "I am praying for you". They also say, "I am sending you good vibes".

That's all very nice and appreciated but I am sincerely looking for the support and strength to keep going. I want to keep finding the good things in life, the joy, the wonder, the excitement, anything that makes my life worth living. I don't want to give into the perpetual desire to clock out of the human race. (Not that there is any guarantee things will be better on the other side, just saying.)

As Angelica Hudson says to Drew Barrymore in "Ever After" (It's a really sweet movie by the way.) "No matter how bad things may get, they can always get worse."

It's up to me to make it better and that's a hard concept to swallow. It's just me against this crazy spinning rock. :/

#Support #Depression #Anxiety #ChronicIllness #Community #Support #venting #circadianrhythmdisorder #Journaling #TMS #Acupuncture #chineseherbs #homeopathy #financiallystruggling #unemployed #Divorce #Burnout #Loneliness #Hope #strength #NeverGiveUp #onwardandupward #togetherwecan

My friend and I host a Podcast called Creative Copes. It’s a labor of love- for ourselves, our own journeys and the compassion for others. We hope it becomes an aid for people in similar situation as us. We also have this idealistic approach of trying to end stigma and raise awareness about these conditions life has thrown at us by openly talking about them.
We set out to share our personal stories and how we creatively cope; with humor and with sprinkles of scientific studies that we have looked up.

We want YOU to feel less alone.
Honestly, we all want to feel less alone on this windy road that’s is chronic illness.

You can find us on Instagram @ creative.copes and on any listening platform just search up the name. Listen in, subscribe and message us. We would love some conversations with like-minded people.
.
.
#Podcast #ChronicIllness #ChronicPain #Pain #Fibromyalgia #MyalgicEncephalomyelitis #Agoraphobia #Anxiety #SocialAnxiety #CopingTips #Endometriosis #MentalHealth #spinalinjury #OccipitalNeuralgia #Dysautonomia #ChronicVestibularMigraine #Migraine #Community #Disability #youarenotalone #Spoonie #SpoonieProblems #spoonielife #CheerMeOn

I recently asked a former co-worker, and an experienced professional, to proof my resume. I am illiterate when using a professional vocabulary outlining my skills and abilities.

When I opened the attached file and read the edited document, I literally shed tears. This person knew me. They saw me at work and witnessed my work ethic during good days and bad days. Therefore, when I read their word description of the talents I will bring to a company, their words literally made me rethink who I am…according to me.🫣

Self talk can be rewarding or it can be absolutely debilitating! CPTSD self talk can be deadly, and in more ways than a physical death.

My self-talk mimics words of destruction. This is because, during my formative years, my destruction was desired by an outside authority source. Thus, even now as an adult, love interpreted by my fractured mind is as valuable as seeking to purchase a home with the ten rolls of (fifty) pennies you have saved in your savings account. 😞! Meaning, it just does not add up to much. Basically, you may have money, but it is not a valuable sum, sadly.

So, this entry serves as a reminder to myself, when healthy people know you and they define you as they see you, especially through a positive healthy lens, as the credit card ad says, the experience is, “PRICELESS”!!!❤️

#ComplexPosttraumaticStressDisorder #Fear #insecurity

#Healthy #Friends #Community #Connectivity #security

Hi there I usually post quotes on a mental health friendly supportive Instagram account, occasionally I journal or blog very rarely on blogs I’ve tried before, but I’ve never ever been brave enough to show my face and actually try a YouTube account D: and not be more anonymous behind the screen supporting. I would really appreciate any love or opinions before I risk getting hate comments or trolls with mental health stigma haha > mental health advocate than 😅😂🤣 people actually see it. But I would love to be able to help someone out there not feel so alone in their struggles or offer hope if they are just beginning their journey or could use some kind words/ experiences

If anyone could give me a bit of a boost 😂 so I don’t freak out or overthink the fact I actually did this and made it public and it could actually become something meaningful, I appreciate it! But if not :) I’ll do my best to do it myself, thanks! I tried to be brave and just do it instead of only think about it as a new hobby/ outlet.

My YouTube channel is:

My Anxiety Journey

Or was thinking

Inside My Anxiety Journey, since it’ll be pretty personal ^^ and genuine/ raw :p at times telling my experiences or what it’s like struggling with an invisible illness, physical/ mental.

Thanks!

Appreciate any love
I feel so nervous and embarassed. But actually proud I had the guts to do it D: though I was so back and forth about it.

Hope I’ll stick to it whether I receive good feedback or not, to actually make a meaningful difference and get more courage to do other things like this with advocacy groups or opportunities.

youtube.com/@laurao2107

PS the 3 views are probably me 😅😂 overthinking and analyzing it too much but trying not too haha 😛 😆. I’m a work in progress lmfao 🤣 lol.

A really big deal to me, because I’m perfectly fine being open about my experiences and trying to help or relate to others and support them too, but not used to putting it on the internet like that with my face D: and fear the stigma or openness about it it’s so risky hehe but worth it :) in a way. So I hope it’ll be the start of something new and good. Feel free to share if you have any blogs, YouTube accounts or any fun hobbies/ outlets too ! :)

Also** I’m not posting to promote it, hope it’s allowed here, just needed a little love or support so I don’t back out on my idea 😅😅🥺😭😿💡💖😊😛😆😆😆 because I feel so alone in my experiences sometimes, and don’t want others to feel like that too.

And be alone struggling.

#Anxiety #Support #help #nervous # anxiousbuthappy #anyfeedback #Youtube #New #youtubeaccount #Vlog #Blog #Trying #MentalHealth #Love #Support #supportneeded #ThankYou ! #tryingtobebrave #TheMighty #Community #thanks #appreciateit #Depression #OCD #physicalhealth #MentalHealth #Hobby #Outlet #tryingtofacefears #Phobia #PublicSpeaking #post #Posting #courage #shy #tryingtobebrave #somethingnew #newaccount #youtubeaccount #youtubechannel