Friendship

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I'm new here!

Hi everyone,I'm Vgdawson, and I'm joining this community because I've been carrying something for a while that I'm finally learning to name grief for friendships that didn't end with a goodbye, they just faded.I'm 35 years into adulthood, and like many of you, I've loved and lost people along the way. But the losses that have stayed with me most aren't the ones with clear endings. They're the friendships that slowly quietly slipped away. The best friend of 30 years I no longer speak to. The women who once felt like home, now strangers I scroll past on social media.For a long time, I thought I wasn't "allowed" to grieve these losses because no one died. There was no funeral, no ritual, no sympathy cards; just an ache that lingered and questions left unanswered. What happened to us? Did I do something wrong? Was our friendship not as real as I thought?I'm here because I've learned that grief doesn't require a death certificate. It requires love. And when you love someone deeply, for years, for decades; losing them, even to the slow fade of life, deserves to be mourned.I actually wrote a book about this experience called My Best Friend: When Friendships Fade—Unspoken Goodbye, but more than anything, I'm here to connect with others who understand this quiet kind of loss. I want to learn from your stories, share what I've learned, and remind anyone reading this: you're not alone in missing someone who is still alive.
If you've navigated the end of a long-term friendship, I'd love to hear, how did you make sense of it? How did you find peace?Grateful to be here with all of you. Vgdawson
#Friendship #Grief #MentalHealth #newh

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After a 7 year gap I got to meet my best friend again. #Depression #Friendship #FamilyAndFriends #MentalHealth

In 1999 a fellow Pastor rang me and asked me to go with him to Thailand. The trip was in 3 weeks. I said “I would pray about it”. Which meant I had no intention of going but I didn’t want to sound unspiritual.

It became clear God wanted me to go so I went. For 10 days we worked non stop. The night before coming home I was asked to speak one more time. I was exhausted and protested. Finally I agreed to go and would speak one last time.

For a long time before the trip I had been praying to have a true friend. One that would be there for both good and bad times. One I could be transparent with.

After I spoke, everyone there asked me to pray for them. I prayed short, to the point prayers for everyone. Yet, I was drawn back to one guy. I asked him if he struggled with this area of life, that I specified to him. He was shocked and asked how I knew. I explained God had revealed this to me because I could help him.

We became best friends. Many years ago when I first faced mental health issues he jumped on a plane and came to Australia to see me. We are always completely honest and accountable to each other. I would die for him.

Through the busyness of life we have not seen each other for 7 years. Until yesterday. He was in Manila on a business trip. I was flying into Manila after our ministry in Davao.

We got to meet for one hour before he left The Philippines. What a precious miracle. To be able to hug, talk and laugh. One beautiful hour. If I hadn’t gone to Thailand when I did. If I had rested on the last night. I could have missed our friendship. I am so grateful!

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Sick of dead ends and being ignored. I am trying my best to engage my community but it's not working.

Before I got sick I was extremely active in my community. I taught classes, hosted parties, and attended and hosted monthly munches (group get together at a restaurant for food and conversation) I had a lot of friends who I considered to be family.
Then my health tanked hard.
One of my supposed friends called me a hypochondriac. Said I was doing it for attention.
Shortly after, I realized I'm not submissive or Dom. I'm an emotional support puppy. I'm also a sadomasochist. Then someone who I thought was a friend told me I don't belong in the community if I don't engage in power play. I got angry and I deleted my account. I focused on my mental health. I finally am symptom free and happy. Well... Maybe just relieved.
But my physical health... My body is breaking down. My hips and back are really fucked. I had surgery 3 years ago on my lumbar spine but now I've got more stenosis and the fatty growth strangling my sciatic nerve grew back (I was diagnosed with spinal epidural lipomatosis).
My eyes developed bilateral intermittent exotropia. Or rather I had it my whole life but only now found out. And now we know what is causing my migraines. It requires eye surgery but my surgeon said I'm not a candidate. So basically I was told to get used to the pain.
I've got a really awesome pain specialist. On Friday she did nerve block on my lumbar. I think it was 6 injections. It hurt like hell. But right now I feel fine. This is only temporary cuz she needed to know if the pain would respond. I've got follow up in a few days. If everything is good, I'll get the permanent set of injections.
So basically I have been a pin cushion for 6 months. But what kept me positive was my passion for being active in my community. I had plans. I want to start up a poetry exchange munch at coffee shops. I got genuinely excited. I haven't felt this excited in years. This was super important to me.
And then I posted about it.
I didn't realize I did anything wrong. It was a nice post asking if anyone wants to join me for a poetry munch.
Then the group mod messaged me saying I did something wrong. She suggested I just create an event page. Except how do you get people interested if I don't post about it? So I deleted the post and left the group. I'm not sure how to do this now. It's a tangible part of my being. And I feel like I'm being yelled at for trying to start something new.
Well. I can either try elsewhere or I can give up.
#Friendship #writtenword #SpokenWord #Poetry

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Attention all tea and coffee lovers

I'm looking for new friends to chat with and eventually have tea parties on FB messenger. If anyone is interested, just message me. If you want to know more about what kind of tea party, feel free to ask.

#Friendship #coffee #tea #TeaParty

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Good morning

My hips feel great. My back not so much. And my butt cheeks feel like it got kicked. My doctor explained my butt hurts cuz I've been walking like a penguin for 3 weeks. Makes sense. Said it's musculoskeletal pain.

I've got a 10am appointment with my BHH nutritionist today. I'm gonna see if she'll take me to 7 eleven. I want to get a special drink and a bag of puff corn. I might get a cappuccino.

I reconnected with a friend who blocked me for a few years yesterday. She's only 10 minutes away from me. We're gonna go to a stitch and bitch next week. I'm gonna bring my sketch book and pens. I'm gonna try to draw a Krampus. It's at an espresso and tea shop. After we get back, I'm gonna cook dinner for us.

My caregiver used to be anorexic. When she got here in May, she was under 110lbs. Now she's around 133lb and she's much more happy with her curves. She's got more fat in the right place. I'm very proud of her.

#Relationships #Caregiving #Friendship

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NEED FEMALE FRIENDS!!!

I'm looking for Christian Female friends because I only have like 1 and a sister just needs some more emotional support fr 💯😩the struggle is real🥲…Hi🥹💗 #Friendship #Makingfriends #Christian #Emotionalsupport #bored #ADHD #PTSD #Jesus

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CREATE Ambiance

Hi, I know this is a bit outdated but just thought ya'll might want to share pics of your decorated tables, for whatever, Valentines is coming up, have you crafted anything? ANY DELICIOUS valentine recipes to steal our hearts away? IT'S not just about chocolate, you know. #seasonal #ambiance #nourish #Family health #Christmas #Food #home #Relationships #guests #Friendship #Housework

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Give yourself a #boost !

Sometimes a little #coffee cheers me up and makes me feel #better when I am feeling blah. Everything happens for a reason, and there is always a season for things to happen. It is funny how life can be.

Today I wish you the best of love and happiness. Sip some #coffee and share some #Friendship with one another.

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Something Positive That Happened Today

I woke up with a flare & had to cancel the first coffee date I've had with my best friend in months. An hour later, Instacart shows up with pre-pattied Christmas cookie dough, a bag of chocolates, & my favorite instant latte mix. That's friendship.

#Friendship #ChronicFatigueSyndrome #ChronicIllness #Support

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