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    What’s in my head (started as a poem)

    Sweet solitude has been calling my name for quite some time now.
    In my own state of emergency, neediness and loneliness emerged,
    desperation softened my tone,
    Soul screaming with the criss cross of
    Applesauce soft boundaries
    but mouth stayed shut
    Thought this meant I was becoming
    Throat chakra finally blocked
    Had I learned my place?
    or had I just
    always loved being told something was wrong with me
    because it fit my view of me
    in a room with 32 people who think I’m alright
    my fav will be the 33rd who
    Tells me
    what needs fixin’
    So sweet, sweet solitude
    I come to self Humbly every day, in practice
    Strengthen my belief that “I am”
    and I will return to “because we are”

    #SpokenWord #BipolarDepression #PTSD


    Heartbeat: Read Aloud = Spoken Word


    By Erica Camp

    Why is my heart so fragile?

    It’s shattered on the floor

    You can even see it beat

    Even when it’s in pieces

    I long for the person

    Who could take that pain away

    Pulling from a string

    Still connected to my chest

    My attachment

    But is attachment enough?

    I gave you my heart

    Now it’s lying on the floor

    I still have that bond

    Like three sisters holding scissors

    My long cord viewed in the light

    Should we cut it out?

    Release this yanking of my heart

    Broken on the floor

    Begging for me to allow

    For once, fate to intercede

    Oh, my three sisters are you seeing?

    This thread that holds my love

    Toxic and triggered

    Pulsing with fear and anxiety

    Why am I this way?

    Why do I want to be loved?

    I want a love that’s whole


    But I must pick up the pieces

    And I’ll cry over years past

    Of memories that are sweet

    Like a peach in the summer

    Turned sour like lemon juice

    You want your freedom to live

    But all I want is someone

    Whose heart can beat alongside mine

    Fate will cute this string of my destiny

    They are just waiting for me to say the word


    #heartbreak #PTSD #Poetry #SpokenWord #Trauma #Grief


    #SpokenWord poem I wrote. Titled: "You are the Light" For anyone feeling beat up and discouraged in this world.

    Noone ever tells you how hard life really is.

    They fill your head with premeditated worries about neverending bills and jobs you will hate

    They tell you to get used to being tired and forget about the plans that you made

    They say growing up is all about being honest while learning how to be fake.

    They don't tell you about the thoughts you think when you come home at night and throw your hands in the sink

    Washing your hands and face of today's lost dreams,

    You stand crying for a minute because you can't help but think

    while the forbidden tears roll down your cheeks

    About how hard life really is.

    It's more than what they told us. Atleast it is for me.

    Because with the cards that I was dealt i had no choice but to see,

    the dark side of this world before it ever saw me.

    And I can't be the only one that seen.

    There's more to this then what they say

    It's feeling numb but knowing pain

    It's constant guilt and endless shame

    It's dark thoughts on sunny days

    It's feeling lost when you know the way

    It's wanting to speak with no words to say

    It's wanting to forgive but your hearts full of hate

    It's wanting to forget but your minds full of rage

    It's dreaming of being free from a life time of pain

    It's a constant game

    Of you against yourself

    And you against the world

    An invisible war that you can never be prepared for

    Because they can't ever put it into words about how hard life really is

    Because it's losing hope when hopes all you had

    It's one step forward two steps back

    It's getting ahead just to get caught in a trap

    So life can catch you quicker and take all that you have

    Faster than if you had stayed in the back

    Because that's the way life really is

    You've never been ahead, you're just on a different path

    And I'm not being selfish but this is all that I have

    To offer to those who have been caught in this same trap

    Who have been lost and who have been afraid and who have been speechless and been ashamed

    If it means nothing to noone except for you I want you to know

    that it's okay. Just let go

    But they don't tell you THAT that much do they?

    They leave out the fact that you have fought and fought and fought and though you are wounded, you are still standing

    They leave out the fact that you would not have been taught life's greatest lessons without this constant changing

    They forgot to mention that behind every dark corner there is a light that's STILL gleaming,

    Waiting to be noticed to remind you to never stop dreaming

    Never stop believing,

    because even though this world can be deceiving do not believe that your life has no meaning

    Because it does
    You are that light.

    You are the very flickering flame that someone needs

    You are the voice that speaks to a soul in need,

    You are the light

    You are the hand that holds a broken piece to someones heart that's needing peace

    You are the smile that changes a persons day, you are the friendly face that pauses the pain

    You ARE the light

    You are the eyes that see the purpose in others when they can't seem to see

    You are the energy it takes to help them believe that just like you, you have got to believe

    That you ARE the light

    You are the phone call that could save a persons life

    You are the friend that could pull out the knife - in the back of someone who's losing sight

    of life's greatest purpose because they've been too afraid to fight

    The battle against what the world wants us to believe is right

    So if you feel like your losing your purpose I hope to God that you heard this

    Because you are most certainly worth it no matter how bad that you're hurting

    I hope you know your important, I hope you know that you're loved

    I hope you know that you're not alone and that you are always enough

    I hope you know that you're strong, I hope you know that you got this

    I hope you remember all the battles that you won and you fight this

    I hope you stay with me, and that you never forget that you are that light.

    And most importantly I hope you learn to love your life.

    #SpokenWord #Poem #MightyPoets #Motivation #Depression #Anxiety #PTSD #Trauma #PanicAttack

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    Andrea Gibson, I adore you.

    Spoken word artist Andrea Gibson has such a beautiful way with words. I needed to hear this, a few lines from a favorite poem. I highly recommend listening to her poem “Asking Too Much” on YouTube. Totally unrelated to this, but an absolute “makes you think” kind of piece with a sweet ending.
    #MightyPoets #Poetry #SpokenWord #Healing #Depression

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    Doctors, uninformed yet well meaning family members, friends and strangers - we can all have assumptions made when it comes to invisible health conditions and chronic illness. Words said that stick and feelings that we cannot control. I hope this short poem makes you feel at least a little more empowered 💛

    You can’t choose the words that people say
    But you can choose the ones that stay….

    You can choose the ones that hold power
    And whether they make you rise or cower

    After all,
    even rain is required for a rose to flower 🌹

    #Depression #ADHD #ChronicIllness #Anxiety #ChronicPain #slowtransit #PelvicFloorDysfunction #MentalHealth #IBS #IBD #Bullying #YouGotThis #Poetry #TheMighty #themightypoets #painting #SpokenWord #gut #medicalgaslighting


    Hello The Mighty Poets and Poetry & Fiction Readers

    I would like to introduce myself to you fellow poets, poetry lovers, and fiction enthusiasts from The Mighty. My name is Antonio. I have an interesting body of literary works that focus on mental health that many of you might be interested in.

    I have digital stories on YouTube on my recently launched channel with myself and others reciting some of my spoken word poetry.

    I've also written two novels of mental health fiction ("Destiny's Stereo" and "Love Is in the Eye of the Beholder") that feature tons of my free-verse and spoken word poetry and storytelling. In honor of National Suicide Prevention Month, these books are being sold exclusively on Amazon for a discounted price. Check me out!




    #SuicidePrevention #SuicidalThoughts  #SuicideAwareness #MightyPoets #MentalHealth #mentalhealthfiction #SpokenWord #MajorDepressiveDisorder #SchizoaffectiveDisorder #Trauma   #Fiction


    #SpokenWord #Musings #Poetry

    I think about the small room. I remember the pale wallpaper adorned with pastel flowers, carelessly painted over with white paint, forced to hide the past. I realise I am still in the room, I can feel the fabric of the rectangular sofa with high and harsh edges. It's old and tries to keep me. The room is still and quiet but it's not quiet. I know it is not still. I am screaming and they are trying to capture me. I don't understand why and all I can do is cry. My mother is crying as well, pushing God towards me, certain He will keep the demons away. Maybe there are different types of demons? Maybe they are not afraid of Him.

    I blink at the small green frog at the window. I can hear crickets and light rain in the garden. Water droplets are gently and rhythmicly tapping on the pond's surface. I read in my book of reptiles that that frog is poisonous. I think it's poisonous. I think I will not go out tonight.

    I am restless. I have a fever and I dreamt that all my medicine have come alive and are chasing me, forcing me into a cupboard. How silly, I think, as my tiny heart pounds against my tiny chest. The floor is cold and harsh. I try not to open my eyes while trying to find my mother's hand. I hold her hand and she holds mine. I wonder if they will let me sleep on their floor again tomorrow. I don't want to be alone in my room. My father snores loudly. I fall asleep.

    They gave me a silver ring with turquoise detail. It is adjustable and fits my slender pinky finger perfectly. I think about turtles and glowing light in between the cracks of the stone. I am in a glass dome and everything is peaceful.

    #past #Childhood #Trauma

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    Chemicals - Spoken Word

    Hi all - I’ve been struggling for so long and have kept what’s inside, inside. I recently started telling those close to be that I have Bipolar. I’ve felt a lot shame in regards to this despite my education around mental health. Thanks to some new medication and some time with my good friend hypomania I recorded my first spoken word piece. Check it out if you’d like, I’m just happy to be hear with this community. youtu.be/IcrFG3m-1zM #BipolarDisorder #SpokenWord

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    Give them to me all
    If the void in me will be filled
    Fill me to the max
    With your poisoning until I'm sick
    I don't care at all if they don't affect me in anyway
    I just want to feel like I'm trying
    So pass them all this way
    See even if they don't really work
    I'm going to trick myself into believing
    Cause the road I'm heading down
    Has me full blown screaming

    I was fine,
    totally fine for a while
    I even had myself convinced
    Like walking down a flight stairs
    You can be fine & out of nowhere
    You skip a random step, your heart sinks
    That Mini heart attack.
    See that's my bloody life
    No one gets that-say they do-but really don't.
    But Cris, find out what's wrong
    Dig in deeper
    there has to be something
    Your absolutely right
    Hold that thought--Dj pass the Mic

    Well, until that day comes I guess I found my new drug habit.
    I've been fucking up so long the time has come for me to do no wrong
    I'm tried of mistakes
    Even when right
    people only see the wrong
    I'm fighting for my life
    And no one knows it
    Isn't it bazaar -that I smile
    Tho Inside I'm crying
    I'm the perfect actress
    But I'm broke, that's the irony

    Pop another pill
    I Probably shouldn't with this whiskey
    I Try to look around and find something to center me
    But if I look to hard I get deterred
    We're fucking up
    But- that another's speech
    So I'm trying out these pills
    To see if life can finally be a dream
    They tell me not to take them
    I'll go crazy-
    It will break me-
    Crazy-Your jesting right?
    Break me?
    Nonsense! - I'm already shattered
    Have you not been listening?

    I wonder what your input would be if you were in my shoes...
    Specifically on the nights I walk a path up to the roof...
    where else do you turn
    When you talk yourself off the edge
    What's crazy is how I don't even want to kill my self
    But something here(points to head)
    & here(points to heart) prevents that from happening!
    I can't be the woman I want to be
    Cause these demons suck me up
    Wish I Knew how to rid myself of them
    They really hard to fucking live with
    It's not Cristina I want to kill, it's that bitch devil that resides within me.
    I'm not sure when she came
    Maybe she was there all along
    But fuck me is she twisted.
    What's scary is .... Sometimes I like it.

    So you see anything to calm her
    Anything to numb the pain
    Even if it's bullshit
    I have nothing to lose at the end of the day ...
    So fuck it!
    I'm all in
    Placebo me up baby!
    I'm Popping pills everyday
    Here's to the pharmaceutical district*


    Note: For years I was indecisive about using medication as part of my treatment. I wrote this word a few weeks into having started taking them.

    #MightyPoets #Depression #Bipolar #Placebo #SpokenWord #Myreality

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    Blame Or Bias

    A poem about society....

    Please see my Twitter for full poem and other pieces @thepisspoorpoet
    #Poetry #SpokenWord #MentalHealth #Anxiety #MightyPoets #Depression #MentalIllness #Society #Lifestyle