hateme

I am nothing, I don’t have anything good, my whole personality is horrible, my body, my face, even my name is horrible, I hate me, I hate me so much. #Depression #hate #horrible #hateme #Hatemyself

So I have always cycled between being ok. Like an even keel. I can be alright and sure of myself. It only lasts for maybe a week or less. Then the sadness, loneliness, helplessness, self doubt, self hate, and melancholy hit me. This lasts for maybe a few days, weeks, or months. Therapy has never helped. I've been through so many therapists and medications. I've tried all of the self care things you can imagine. Nothing sticks. All of my past jobs have not been very understanding of my mental health struggles. This is the first time my attendance has been an issue. My question is: what is the point in going on if the cycle never ends? What's the point if I will always be tired? Why keep trying to swim against the current? Why keep going when I don't feel satisfaction or joy or reward or hope? #Depression #why #hateme #Anxiety