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The one with depression, sadness, anxiety, no one could understand anything are overlapping. #Depression #Sadness #MentalHealth

When you think that your counselor seems cannot help you with your depression and anxiety, since they might never feel how hard it is to live in such depressing moment every single day.

Where life is too much to handle, started with financially shortage, stressful day because no one cannot understand the way your brain works, and the fear of talking with any one, the overload worries because you just cannot control it.

I want to try to start my life with wake up happy and be productive, but this thing called anxiety always gets in the way.

And everytime I tried to counsel this in my therapy session they only gave me the big question -- "why are you afraid?"

if I had already known the answer, i would not have a session in the first place.

I just cannot control it. That is why.

Especially when I need a job right now, I just cannot think anything good but a failure. I even have not yet applied to anything.

Just need some nerve soothing to ease the pain.

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Hi my name is Cyani. My friends call me Skylar. My father passed away last year and I'm having a hard time letting him go.#Depression #Sadness #EatingDisorder

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Got no cleaning done today

It's been a bad day. My #Depression is bad right now. There's a local leather bar in my town and it's just outside my ability to walk there but I don't have transportation to get there either. They had a big event this weekend and I couldn't get to it. I don't have connections in my community like I used to.

Years ago I was in a puppy competition and it was wonderful but after I lost I basically was forgotten. It's a big popularity schtick. If you're not hyper sexual and in the winners circle you don't exist. So I'm a nobody. Just a trans puppy in a cis community and I don't fit in.

I need new friends but I can't get out to make new friends. It's a shit sandwich.

I didn't have any spoons to clean. I did a lot yesterday and the day before yesterday. I'm gonna try again tomorrow. I've just got my dining room and vacuuming to do. I am trying to be kind to myself and learn to be gentle with when I'm struggling.

#Depression #Sadness #Anxiety #CheckInWithMe

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° " Soooo I Have Been Dealing With Massive Regret... " ° #Feelinglost #Sadness

▪︎ " So Remember On My Last Post I Said That I Had 3 Suitor's... But Only One Caught My Eye... Since Then I Have Been Feeling Like I Messed Up Badly By Passing The Guy That Was Very Nice.. Up Because My Lovely Anxiety Got In The Way.. Now I'm Feeling Like I Will Never See This Person That I Hit It Off With Again... Which Sux Because We Definitely Have Chemistry And Alot In Common... Sigh!!! OH WELL!!! • I Alway's Seem To Get Veteran's That Hit On Me The Most.. Which Is Funny.. I Guess The Universe And The God's Are Trying To Tell Me.. To Try Again... L.M.F.A.O " ° Sincerely, × Skaoi Kvitravn #Thought 's #Depression

6 reactions 4 comments

How to accept your depression/ sadness on bad days?

When it strikes out of nowhere sometimes or is constantly there even though you try hard to be positive or accept your emotions or do things to manage it. I’m used to feeling anxiety but I guess have a tougher time when I’m tired, fatigued or struggle when I’m down and can’t try to change it.

It’s a part of life we can’t constantly be happy etc but I guess it’s just hard sometimes.

#Depression #Sadness #Acceptance #Emotions #struggling #overwhelmed

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It. Hurts. To. Feel. This. Way.

I had another ptsd nightmare that really messed with my head. Breathing exercises didn't work, I've got this heaviness in my chest... IT HURTS SO MUCH!! #MentalHealth #Depression #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #NarcissisticAbuse #Sadness #CPTSD

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Newly diagnosed

So I have recently been told it is likely I have Crohn's disease. I was supposed to do a colonoscopy to confirm this, but y'all, I could not get through that gross prep stuff they make you drink, ugh!

Last Wednesday, I ended up in the ER because I had been having right side abdominal pain that started Tuesday morning and just kept persisting and had gotten a bit worse. It made it hurt to walk upright too. So while in the ER they did a CT scan with contrast and my colon was so swollen you could not see my appendix! They had initially thought that is what was going on. The nurses then consulted with the doctor I was supposed to see for the colonoscopy and he is the one who gave the diagnosis. I do have an office visit with him later this month I guess to discuss where we go from here and other stuff I guess.

I am so new to this and I am not happy either of course because not going to lie, I am not good with changes to my diet but from what I am understanding about this, I have no choice or I will suffer some very serious complications.

This is on top of a diagnosis of laryngopharyngeal reflux that I got during the pandemic. It is also called silent reflux because you have virtually no symptoms. So I have been wondering now if the 2 are related, But that has caused me issues with swallowing and eating. So badly, I barely ate and lost 15lbs and my doctors said nothing about it. But so it is ok now, but sometimes gets bad and so because of it I have issues with swallowing pills. I have almost choked on pills a few times while taking antibiotics for the ER visit last week. I am just so sad about it and was wondering if anyone can offer any advice or hacks or tips to manage this and recipes. Info on what I can eat, what I cannot would be amazing too! #Crohns #CheckInWithMe #reflux #InflammatoryBowelDisease #Depression #Sadness #Anxiety

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Thursday Thoughts and Lunch

Thanks be to God that I was blessed with the energy to cook a solid meal for the first time in a couple of days. Scrambled eggs with olive oil, turmeric, sea salt, pepper, garlic powder, and rosemary; snap pea chips and white toast with sweet potato butter. It needs some work and may not look the best, but it was pretty tasty. Listening to music while cooking also really helped.

I’ve not felt the best in a minute, and my faith has suffered and weakened these past few weeks. I worked my first job recently for three days before my anxiety prevented me from holding it down. In a restaurant, too, to beat it all. All the while, I was struggling spiritually, emotionally, and mentally. It’s only slid further downhill from there. I haven’t read my Bible in a while either because I’m scared of what I might come across, and I haven’t been good at following its teachings in years.

I’m no good at self-care, but I’m trying to prioritize it more today. I went outside yesterday and sat in the shade while listening to music. It sounds hokey, but it made me feel a little better. I started picking up my room, as it was cluttered. I made my bed today and put some stuff away. I still need to do dishes and laundry and clean my drain. That’ll come soon, hopefully.

How do you engage in self-care?

#Anxiety #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorder #Sadness #Spirituality #Religion #Cooking #Selfcare

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Need to go thru to get thru

April 12 flash flood happened. This whole process has been a nightmare. Vacuuming the flood water then drying the floors with multiple fans. The loud noise from them in conjunction with trying to hear yourself or anything. Having to move all furniture and belongings to make space for workers. Hoping all will be done in a timely manner without feeling homeless. Well, I feel homeless... Having to leave and learn a new way of living with another person... Waiting. No update. Now concerned that it's been a month... Attempted just to have a nice dinner with my family and I'm about to pass out. Shakes and can't walk without help.... Was having a good talk with my daughter then the room was turning black. Started feeling shaky and weak...Focusing on my breathing trying to stay conscious... While during this time many attempts to do an interview but having to cancel every time. My body keeps going against me. Now feeling depressed and deep sadness. This was to be for my daughter. Who's already going thru her own shit on top of being homeless. I know she understands and that breaks my heart more. All I need to do is share how wonderful our relationship is and I can't do that. They will follow up, with around me and I greatly appreciate it. However of course I feel bad...
Lupus sucks huge. I generally am in the most positive spirits but this time is just too much. And as much I look ok externally, that's definitely not what's happening internally. And I feel it. ALL of it. I mean I am grateful everything. Really I am. But right now, I can't feel the gratefulness. It's not lifting and I'm ready to cry. I'm hurting too much and I'm not gonna fight it. And the fact that I can't be at home while I'm feeling like this just makes it all even more worse. I just wish for more than a day of feeling good so I can truly enjoy life.
Thank you for reading.
I needed to vent and it's nice I have this safe place to do that. Not just my journal. 🙏
#Depression #Lupus #chroniceverything #Sadness

21 reactions 12 comments