BP1 on 200mg Lamotrigine 1500mg Dep-kite for 2 years, and honestly (all things 2020 considered) doing pretty well and stable for a while now. But recently... THE NIGHTMARES! Violent, terrifying lucid dreams where I am being hunted, abused, or (somehow worst of all) being persecuted for “not being good enough” and rejected.
In my waking life I have been able to manage things, thanks to a compassionate psychologist, loving wife, and much practice with meditation, mindfulness, and a scheduled healthy regimen. I used to hate the day, but now that is rarely the case. Now I FEAR the night.
SUCH LUCID DREAMS! and horrible ones! I am fully aware of it like I’m wearing a VR headset; I can look around, interact with stuff, make choices...... but everything is dark and twisted and full of malice. I awake many times either in cold sweat or screaming profanity and thrashing. Last night I awoke screaming “F*** you, you f***ing piece of s*** you don’t f***ing tell me what to f***ing do.” Like 100 decibel screaming. Scared the wife half to death and the bed was sweat thoroughly. Again.
10th night in row. 20+ this month. Anyone else with BP taking these meds experienced this? Kinda scared to sleep again tonight...... #Bipolar1Disorder #Lamotrigine #Depakote #Nightmares