Suicidal Thoughts

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someone shoot me, I don’t want to live in this stupid life anymore. it’s fucking hell and im so sick of dealing with a society that only cares about making a profit. I hate being put in boxes. Why am i in this stupid body, I’m not even my assigned gender at birth or human for that matter (too tired to explain the latter, but just know it exists in good-faith). I wish god can just kill me off already, I mean I even bet I was made to become homeless in the future anyway because the government is too fucking greedy so what’s the point of living other than seeing society becoming more greedy and selfish and shallow than ever before? What’s the point if I’m not gonna go out much, anyway?

I was better off dead, wasn’t i?

#SuicidalIdeation #SuicidalThoughts #MyAutismIsNotADisorder #AutismSpectrum #MentalHealth #Anxiety #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorder #OSTD #OtherSpecifiedTraumaDisorder #Trauma

I had an awful painful migraine yesterday that lasted into the night. I’m exhausted and extremely sore today. My head, shoulders and neck feel like I have bruises everywhere.

There’s so much I want to do; I’m so tired of being let down by my own body. I’ve definitely become increasingly isolated (which is actually okay but not at the same time) and less enthusiastic about the future. But, that has a lot to do with the state of the world, right now, too. That’s depressing enough in and of itself.

Nothing feels like it used to - and I’m beginning to think it never will again. I know we move forward - I’m not waxing nostalgic - I’m just missing that spark of hope and happiness that went along with wondering what the future holds. I’m scared that I don’t feel happy about life anymore, overall. And, this scares me even more because I know where it leads and I’m not sure I want to hold onto this existence any longer. Just putting it out there. This is the only place I can express what I’m feeling - with my Mighty tribe. Peace🙏💛

#SuicidalThoughts #Depression #PTSD #Anxiety #Migraine #Osteoporosis #ChronicFatigue #ChronicPain #ADHD