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How do I go back to work?

I'm coming up on 4 months since my son left this world. On his own terms. I was not strong enough to stay at my past job. I couldn't do what they hired me to do. Now, a couple months later, I still don't know if I can. I have been told to "get my shit together" & "life goes on" but I honestly don't want tomorrow to come. How can I convince an employer that I will be there, when I can't see tomorrow? #Grief #unabletowork #Depression #SuicideLoss

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Burnout When You're Not Working

Burnout is a very real experience. Something I've had to learn is that it isn't just reserved for folks who are working. When you're disabled and dealing with multiple chronic conditions, you get burnt out easily as it consumes every single day of your life. Your full time job becomes going for medical tests and doctors appointments and treatments every single day. It doesn't take long for it to happen either. At one point I was feeling this sensation, but I couldn't understand what it was. I knew it felt like burnout but I'm not able to work so it was very confusing. I asked my doctor about it and he said that's exactly what it is. He explained to me how common and normal it is for people like me to suffer burnout. I ended up spacing appointments out even more to one a week at the most now because of how much they actually take out of me to go to. I was ending up canceling all my apointments, just not being able to go and endure explaining the same things over and over and over again without the reality of any sort of helpful treatment or diagnostic labeling. It wreaks havoc and can really make it hard to do what you need to, but my docs advice is what helped and helps me get through it when I have it. Don't resist it. It makes it worse. Embrace it and work with it. If you need to cancel all your appointments for a week straight or two, do it. Take a Staycation and allow yourself to have some much deserved you time. It's a reason he pushes for employers to offer much more paid time off as well because we all need this. There's no reason in a modern world that we are so against burnout like we are. But systematically we are almost not allowed to work with it or even acknowledge it without being labeled as lazy, not a hard worker, or some other less than label. That mentality in the working world falls over into the world of those who are unable to work due to chronic illnesses. So, if you're feeling like it might be burnout, talk to your doctor and develop a plan together to head it off. You too can have burnout whether or not you are able to work. You're not alone. #Burnout #Disability #ChronicIllness #Work #unabletowork #ComplexUnspecifiedNeuromuscularDisease #Fibromyalgia #Undiagnosed #Doctors #MedicalLeave #CPTSD #Depression #MentalHealth


Doctor's Unwillingness to Take My Illness On

Why are doctors pushing me to different specialist after different specialist when they can't figure out what is going on with me. I've had so many give up or are unwilling to treat me.  What happened to our healthcare system?
#selfcare #fedup #unabletowork

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How do you know when it’s time to be off work?

My job is unique where I drive trains do first aid and work with police to find persons who are feeling suicidal and made a threat to use our specific train system as a means to take their life. This is my 9th year. Recently the company provided us with a new Mental Health Assessment course which I took last night. It was like looking at myself from both sides of the table. Now I’m second guessing everything. I’ve been having lots of low days and fighting. My immune system is shot and I have many physical symptoms and anxiety attacks tears etc. If I can’t assess myself how can I do my job? #unabletowork #Stopworking #worklifebalance #workstruggles #Anxiety #Depression #BorderlinePersonalityDisorderBPD