Ankylosing Spondylitis

In relationships, I’ve been told many times that I check off all the boxes (kind, compassionate, family-oriented, loyal, and so on). But the one box they never wanted in their life was chronic illness.

I’ve been thinking about this a lot recently. I feel like the world we live in needs to understand that literally anyone can develop a chronic illness at any point in their life.

For me, my chronic illnesses started showing up in childhood. So, in some ways, I’ve had a lot of time to learn how to cope, adapt, and figure out what life looks like for me and of course I’m still working on it.

But I don’t think people always understand that chronic illness isn’t something that only happens to certain people. Mental health conditions can appear at any point in someone’s life. Accidents happen. Injuries happen. Illnesses happen. Bodies change. Life changes. Someone can wake up one day and suddenly find themselves navigating a reality they never imagined for themselves.

Not all chronic illnesses are the same, but the emotions that come with receiving a diagnosis and knowing it’s lifelong can be surprisingly similar: grief, fear, anger, uncertainty, loneliness, and the feeling that you have somehow become a burden to the people around you.

But you are not a burden.

You and your chronic illness are not baggage.

Your chronic illness is a bouquet you get to carry every day. Sometimes we carry it gracefully. Sometimes our flowers are blooming. Sometimes they’re wilting, and we’re just trying to make it through the day.

And when they wilt, we don’t throw the bouquet away. We refresh the water. We tend to the flowers. We give ourselves the care we need and try again tomorrow.

Your chronic illness does not make you less worthy of love. It does not make you less deserving of a relationship, a career, friendships, adventures, or a beautiful life.

It is a part of your story, but it is not the entirety of who you are.

And maybe, with time, we can stop seeing chronic illness as baggage someone else has to carry and start seeing it for what it really is: a bouquet we’ve learned how to carry.

Sometimes with grace. Sometimes with both hands. Sometimes with a little help from a friend.

But we carry it.

#MentalHealth #Depression #Fibromyalgia #Lupus #Uveitis #Blindness #Glaucoma #ChronicPain #Anxiety #AnkylosingSpondylitis #Arthritis #HypothyroidismUnderactiveThyroidDisease #HashimotosThyroiditis

Hi, my name is Bendo. I've been diagnosed with

#MightyTogether #ADHD #RheumatoidArthritis #EhlersDanlosSyndrome #AnkylosingSpondylitis

I had a really bad setback today. I got really depressed, and didnt have a reason for feeling so hopeless. I felt inconvenient, and lonely, even though no one said or did anything. And no one needed to. Healing isnt linear, and I know I'm going to have flare ups(whether that be POTs, Arthritis, or just depression), no matter how much prevention I do. And it's hard to deal with, but it didnt ruin my day, or up-end my progress. Instead I went out, and did something fun. I still feel kinda bad, but I know it's just a little road block. I dunno.

#POTS #AutonomicDysfunction #MentalHealth #Depression #Arthritis #AnkylosingSpondylitis

Last Friday, in the early hours, my pet bunny passed away. She was with me for eight years. I miss her so much. We rushed her to the emergency vet as she was struggling to breathe. We had to euthanize her because she was living with a congenital heart disease and her heart had swollen and started crushing her lungs. She had adapted slowly over the years and then suddenly she was out of time. I hope she is hopping over the rainbow bridge 💔💗🐰 and joining all my other bunnies there too. I've had pet bunnies my whole life. I really really miss her. It's been so hard to clean out her hutch and her things without her here.

To top it all off I overslept due to not sleeping well (was crying the whole night) and then I was late to work (really late).

Some colleagues had flown up from Cape Town and from Ireland for a workshop and I was late to meet them. Horrible first in person impression....

Then the following week Monday my period started. On top of this at the conference venue they served gluten, sugar and milk at almost every meal. My IBS started flaring from Tuesday onwards...

I was late again twice that week. I'm not proud of that.

Finally on Friday I was really early to the workshop. But this time the conference served peanuts inside their creamed spinach for lunch. Triggering a whole peanut poisoning episode... I left work early in a rush and a panic to get to an EpiPen at home (also not great - as it was the last day of the workshop and we had to say goodbye to our foreign colleagues). Not great for my work performance honestly.

This is why I have a remote job. I can manage my conditions remotely, even when there are many uncontrollable stressors like my bunny dying... But if you add going into an unfamiliar conference venue everyday where they just poison you nonstop...

Yeah I feel totally shit after this week... Physically and mentally...

How do I CBT this?

#prurigonodularis #AnkylosingSpondylitis #PsoriaticArthritis #Grief #MajorDepressiveDisorder #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorder @ @ @

Has anyone had experience with a pain pump. I am scheduled to get one implanted but a little nervous about it as many meds just do not help me. #AnkylosingSpondylitis #Arthritis #RheumatoidArthritis

Hello everyone, I hope you’re all doing well. Because of ankylosing spondylitis and the medications for it, is it common to feel constantly exhausted and struggle to finish work on time? How do you manage frequent delays and cancellations? #AnkylosingSpondylitis #ChronicFatigue #Uveitis #MentalHealth