Heartbreaking

Why it's so hard to stay in a relationship when you have anxiety disorder? 😢 #Love #couples #Heartbreaking

#overwhelmingemotions as I write this. Last weekend my husband packed all of his belongings and left. He came back the next day. But has made it clear we are not going right back to how things were. He’s taken off his wedding ring and refuses to put it back on. He chooses to sleep on the couch instead of our bed. He’s so distant and very short tempered. We have been together since I was 17, so eighteen years, married for 10 come this August. So when I say this is #Heartbreaking believe me I seriously feel I could die of a broke. Heart at this point. You wanna know why I am even more upset? He went out last night, for a “guys night” with his single friends. No wedding ring, he spent 2 hours getting ready to go he shaved his head and trimmed his facial hair and put on his best clothes and shoes. Looking like he was about to take me out for date night! I over heard his friend through the phone while they were talking. The friend mentioned there would be hot girls, my husband immediately changed the subject as he walked out of the room. I asked him if this was a test, to see if I’d let my anxiety drive my jealousy and overbearing feelings and paranoia cause me to blow up his phone all night...he said no. Then I asked him if he would at least call me if he was too drunk to drive. He said no because he wasn’t leaving his truck anywhere, that he’d sleep in his truck! Oh I am so sick with worry that he’s cheating on me. We are supposed to be trying to work things out since 6 days ago...yet he’s doing this! What should I do? What would you think??

Sit beside me
Hug me in the morning.
Sign papers.
A new family forming.

Love never escapes you.
A friendship
All I am made to feel.

Sleep apart.
Loneliness is mounting.
Silent hearts
Can't heal when we are shouting.

Are we even real?
Grasping for hope.
A shrug and "I don't know"

Say it.
Help me feel.
Tell me.
None of it was real.

Just sleep next to me
All I am asking.
Nothing...
#Loneliness #Depression #Heartbreaking #FearOfAbandonment

Hi. My name is .... And I'm an #alcoholic I also have #Bipolar2 which I've finally found the right meds for. Yay!
I recently just got a job. Yay! I kinda dislike it though, but it'll bring more money in. I want to divorce my husband. It slipped when I was drunk last night. I feel numb today. Things are too hard. Mom's falling apart, like literally, and that's so #Heartbreaking to watch. I take her to appointments, and I fall apart at night behind my closed bedroom door. My kids, well, they are the reason I choose to live. Really the only reason. The rest of this life is too hard and it's bullshit. I have no #Motivation or #Energy to cook dinner, but what will my kids eat? I feel super low, like if it weren't for my kids, I would probably admit myself. I guess I just need someone to talk to
Thank you for reading.