Hi, my name is skysdyney. I'm here because I needing help as I have a 14 yr old daughter .. who's been diagnosed with intellectual disability. but I want to know what did u guys do when all they want is a friend but doesn't like doing sport or going to school as bullying is so real just need some ideas .. 🙏
Taking a Disabled Culture approach to Disabled Stories
Part 1 of 2 We are living at a time in which the media, our governments, our storytellers, medical systems, and even so called Social justice organizations forget Disabled folks in the media.
There is also a stereotype about us as Actors and in film that we are liabilities this is beyond outdated. It’s exhausting especially at a time where our lives are the price for the ignorance you choose. Eugenics is real in America nobody talks about it, it’s not taught in schools ,but it’s real.
There are many parts of this issue that are not being addressed in multiple fields.
Asylums shut down for many of us in our lifetimes. For people like me born just after we are the first generation not to be haunted with the fear of being stolen from our families and tortured. The fact that so many alive both have Either Experienced Asylums and survived them or we know people who have either way we have all seen first hand the cost of disrespecting the Disabled Community and invisible disabilities.
As a result Disabled Individuals have worked their entire lives trying to break stereotypes and unhealthy portrayals of us in the media as well as in our systems. For context I was diagnosed with Autism at 4. By the time I was 8 it was my job to educate you on how to treat me. I don’t mind it I like educating and building bridges between our communities. I just want to demonstrate we started children with educating on Disability and our Disabled culture.
What is Society and Media regarding how our society discusses Disability:
First: Only Discussing Disability in Medical terms.I am proud to be Disabled and Autistic but more than anything I am proud of Disabled culture and l the sub cultures within it. Growing up in Disabled spaces needs to be discussed culturally. why? Some Disabilities are Genetic When my friends and I go out we still sometimes asked to leave places for “Making people uncomfortable.” Either because our invisible disabilities give us a hard time navigating social norms for that space or people are simply uncomfortable with any sort of body difference.
Media,Film,Theater,Stories; over the last few years has been exhausting for Disabled people. I originally wanted to be an Actress but as I read more and more scripts I noticed in many roles I would be asked to betray my community to play these roles. To promote outdated ideas ,stereotypes, pretend I’m cool with my Autism being used as a literal insult/joke in the scripts. Worst of all is that in these rooms I’d be the only one to see it.
I’ve been asked to educate your society since I was a child on My Autistic and Disabled Culture. Able bodied and Nuerotypical folks are rarely asked to put in the same effort we are.
We have to learn social skills We have to ask for access to your spacesWe have to carry cards saying we are Autistic so Police don’t shoot Something especially being a problem for B.I.P.O.C members of our Community who are given the least respect out of all of us. We have to advocate against Abelism, Eugenics,Inspiration porn,all while also balancing how to discuss and support our own in unlearning Abelism against themselves or a so called “High functioning supremacy.” When Functioning isn’t our word it’s yours.
Our word is accessibility.Why is this person having trouble accessing the space, the education material, the social circle ,and how can we provide tools to make it easier for that person to access and engage.
Our Disability isn’t Your Contest
It’s weird that we have a culture around “Proving.” #Disability. The idea Invisible Disabilities need to be visible or fit your stereotypes of “Disabled.” Some people have ambulatory disabilities meaning may need to use a wheelchair or cane one day but be ok to walk in certain situations if the person themselves seems safe or comfortable.
Stop pitting Disabled people against each other
Physical Vs Invisible Perceived High or Low functioning.Fetishizing certain Disabilities while continuing to ignore the contributions of folks With #IntellectualDisabilities in our communities.
Ignoring the MAJOR privileges you have in regards to both civil rights and medical care:
6 out of 10 people who have died from #COVID19 have been disabl
Lately, I’ve encountered a lot of professionals that look to me as an expert with counseling students with developmental disabilities. Yes, I feel confident with my expertise in working with these students, but honestly, I feel that my trauma training has had a bigger impact on my practice than my training in modalities with autism and life skill classrooms. Yes, it is helpful to be well versed with utilizing common tools in this world, such as the zones of regulation, sorting thumbs up and thumbs down behaviors, and following a predictable routine. That is the easy part of working with these students. Anyone can do that.
What many therapists do not understand is what these students truly value just like any other student. They want to connect with you. This may look different from a typical student, but it is still true. If you do not establish a positive connection with these students, you will see behaviors that are unwanted, to say the least. These students are not just vessels that need curriculum poured into their eyes and ears. They are not going to always be motivated by a reinforcer or praise. The most reinforcing activity is going to be interacting with someone that respects their wants and needs. They can be reinforced by someone who accepts them for the unique individual they have become. These students need to know that their opinions about their own lives are not only important, but should be the driving force behind their goals in their individual education plan.
As parents of kids with special needs, we develop into mama bear activists, empowered by our love of our children. We only want the best for our kids, but around adolescence, we get knocked onto our behinds by the onset of puberty. Our goals all of these years were to help our children make progress, but when they get close to that 18 to 21 mark, we tend to not want to hand the baton over to our grown children. I understand that our kids are all at different levels of abilities, but I truly believe that all kids need to have a say in their future. If they are 18, at a second grade level in math, and would really like to stop working on math, maybe it’s time to let go. Therapists need to understand and respect these students’ wants and needs, but so do parents. At some point, if the student wants to let go of the academics, and they plan on working at Starbucks, this is definitely something to consider.
So when it comes to doing therapy with these students, I take the same approach as I would a typical student, but I adapt to make sure they have a means of communication. These students, along with typical students, need to practice identifying their feelings, choosing tools to help them process their feelings, and to respect other people’s feelings. That could be through verbal communication, or through visuals, but either way, all people share this same need, and all people are capable of learning this skill.
My explanation why some criminals are part of the ASD community.
Most studies say that people with ASD are more likely to be victims than being perpetrators. While that is true, that statement is too broad, people with co-morbid diagnosis of Intellectual Disability and Autism are actually 20 times more likely to be victims than being perpetrators, compared to people who are on the higher functioning end of the autistic spectrum. Another problem why that statement from most studies is too broad, it is because the diagnostic criteria for Pervasive Developmental Disorders became more broad for the last decade and it was lumped as Autism Spectrum Disorder, and it's broad to the point where even some people with Antisocial Personality Disorder can be considered to have Autism Spectrum Disorder.
Since the diagnostic criteria for Autism became more broad in the last decade, I wonder if I am correct that there are some crimes that with ASD without Intellectual Disabilities are more likely to commit, but due to lack of social skills and repetitive behaviors.