obsessed

Ever become obsessed with something? Could be anything like a song, celebrity, tv show, idea, religion, etc. It seems like that is the only time you feel anything at all otherwise you are just empty of emotion or really sad, I am in situations where I know I should feel happy or excited but I feel nothing, I am good at faking emotions because I have been doing it for years. I have a hard time expressing expressing when I am dissatisfied because I have learned that people don’t listen to me about my worries or concerns. I am the person who starts to tell a story or relay information and someone else decides that what I am saying doesn’t interest them and starts talking over me or changes the subject. I have been taught that it is rude to express dissatisfaction or negative emotions even if it is valid. I have a loving and supportive spouse but I still go through depression episodes where I feel so sad I just want to hide in bed and cry. I am on medication and it is working but I seem to go through periods where I feel like this and long stretches where I am doing really well. I have chronic fatigue and pain. I work full time and have a part time job to get spending money. I have been wanting to cry for weeks but never can. It feels good to write my situation down even if nothing comes of it. #empy #obsessed #frustrated

Hi. I’m writing here because I’m kind of scared for myself. I’ve become obsessed with this guy I talked to for 2 months. It’s like I’ve gone bonkers. We only hung out once. He almost took my virginity, thank God I didn’t let it go that far or I’d probably be feeling worse. But then he basically ghosted me. And I kept calling/texting him like a crazy person. And then I worried something may have happened to him becuase I’m thinking “why would he ignore me? No way he’d be so cruel.” So I went to his house and he said nothing just closed the door in my face. He’s made it clear he doesn’t want to talk to me ever again but I don’t know why and that drives me crazy. Along with the rejection. And I miss him? Idk how. But I do. I haven’t been diagnosed with BPD, just depression and anxiety, but I’m pretty sure I have it. I’ve never handled rejection well in dating and I think this is worse this time because of the physical aspect. I just don’t know what to do. He told me if I contacted him again he’d contact lawyers and the police and show them his phone records. That’s the only thing stopping me. But I STILL want to talk to him. And I’m scared it won’t ever go away. I don’t want to be this person. He deserves to be left alone. I get that. But my brain just keeps thinking about him and just wishing he’d talk to me.

Has anyone else experienced something similar? I don’t want to be a stalker or a bother. I just don’t know what to do. I thought he really cared about me. He laid it on thick. But it was all just talk I guess.

I’m a high school teacher, and I have had two students this school year who have brought bed bugs to school with them. Bugs are a huge trigger for my OCD, and about two weeks ago, I killed a bug on the desk of one of my students and when asked, I replied that it was a spider as not to embarrass my student. Since then, I have become completely consumed with the fear that I have bed bugs. I live in an old house in the country and it is not atypical for me to have various pests (ants, beetles, etc.), but my house is by no means infested. However, now every speck I see is a bug or a shell and the signs that an infestation is inevitable. I try very hard to remind myself that I’m being irrational, but at the same time, my brain is telling me that by ignoring it, I’m actually allowing an actual infestation to occur. I constantly feel like I have bugs crawling on me and it’s gotten so bad that I’ve even mistaken my own freckles for bugs. I am losing my mind over this, and it is constant. #exhausted #OCD #obsessed

We text. I barely know her. We have conversations sometimes and she will occasionally share a lot but mostly will listen and respond for awhile then disappear again for a day or two and it will just kinda happen mid conversation. She has BPD like me. She is half my age. I’m finding out now after about a week or so that she is probably a lesbian. Wtf is wrong with me that I am so obsessed with her? I hate when this happens. It always hits me out of nowhere. This woman, however, has so much in common with me which is unusual for the type of person I typically obsess over making it harder 2.