painsucks

I sometimes have these moments where I feel myself come back. I sit there and take it in knowing it won’t last long. I’ll sit there and appreciate that I’m still here, deep down I’m still here and I’ll come out every once in awhile. I fight for her to come out everyday but it’s not easy.

I sit there and appreciate the moment of peace, no pain, no rapid thoughts, just myself. Not the amber that’s filled with physical anxiety, not the panic filled amber, not the amber that has full body tremors almost daily.

I appreciate the moment of silence, of peace, the small moment I get to think “I’ll be ok, I’m not dying” the small seconds I get to breath and my brain calms down before it all slips away again. #Anxiety #PanicAttack #hashimotos #GravesDisease #MentalHealth #ChronicPain #painsucks #anxietysucks

I am having such a rough time today and yesterday. Headaches and pain so bad that I had to leave work yesterday early and called out today. It just gets to be so depressing and hopeless. I am mentally and physically exhausted. It would be so much easier to just throw in the towel. I try to be positive and keep my "everything is good" mask on my face. I just wanted to let out what I was feeling. Better to share than to hold it in. #ChronicPain #ChronicIllness #Chronicpainwarrior #Fibromyalgia #ChronicFatigue #SpinalStenosis #DegenerativeDiscDisease #painsucks
#Migraine #iwanttogiveup

Well I am happy this week is over! Even though there was some awesome days, the bad ones just made it exhausting!!
To end this week I am going into a flare! Yaya... 😬
But before it really hit, when you feel it slowly coming, I took my Loki out for a walk and my youngest daughter came out with me!! It was nice!! I am happy I put all my strength in for that hour because it was the best hour out of the whole day! Look at my puppy's face!! He just so happy to be out with us!!
I am laying in bed paying for it now and I have my pictures to remind me how worth it, it was!
Well I hope it does last long and a good night sleep will help and feel like a spring chicken in the morning!! A girl can dream!! 😁
Have a good weekend!
#Fibromyalgia #ChronicIllness ##ChronicPain #FlareUps #painsucks

Had a wonderful start to my day!! Took our fur babies to the park for some exercise for all of us! My Loki baby just loved having his nephew with him! Haha... his much older nephew!
My fur grandbaby Beau came with us!! He will be 9 years old tomorrow!! My daughter adopted him a few years ago! He is the greatest!
My fur babies just bring me peace. You can be in such a dark place and they just stay there! Their presence helps so much!!
Tonight is a little different story, just out of nowhere like the sneaky grim reaper, Pain came to say dont forget I am still here. My hands are killing me! Aching so bad, shooting up my arms, and any time I grab something I feel like I am bruised! Double whammy!
Jeesh, having fibro you learn about different types of pain fast!! Oh my favorite part is when you get to experience more than one type at a time!! 🙄 ( adding a little funny sarcasm in there)
Well fibromyalgia you were a little slow today because I got our yummy new years eve dinner done before you showed up, yeah so what, I wasn't able get to the dessert, we have a box of s'more pop tarts! Good enough for us!! So Haha.... bring in the new year on my couch relaxing, watching movies with my family!! Yeah I am in pain but I am not going to let it steal my joy away tonight!
Happy New Year!!
#Fibromyalgia #ChronicPain #ChronicIllness #painsucks

Oh boy!! Lots of pain again!! Is weather change hard on you too?
At least Loki is enjoying it!! Haha... his first Snowfall and I just had to capture it!
Lots happened too! My body isn't taking to well!
This cold snap for sure is not helping!! Tomorrow going to stay snuggled in my heated blanket after I put a pot of Turkey soup on!! Just hope I can find the strength to do so! #Fibromyalgia #ChronicPain #ChronicIllness #Pain #painsucks #TakeItOneStepAtATime

I woke up with a pretty huge headache that's shaping up to be a migraine. My period is supposed to hit any freaking second now. I'm shadow cramping and all around in a crappy, grouchy mood, and I haven't even left my bed yet. I'm already struggling with depression much more in the past two days than I have in a very long time. I'm worried that my physical pain will just increase the emotional, and my depression will escalate to more than probably dangerous levels. Please, if you would be willing and able to, check in with me periodically throughout the day? The accountability is a huge help in fighting this particular demon. Thank you all in advance ❤️❤️❤️ #CheckInWithMe #Depression #Migraine #painsucks