AnxietyDisorder

Sometimes your body takes a hit and you need to step away. Playing music in the car helps clear the mind, but sometimes we need silence.

music.youtube.com/watch

I create music that people can relate to (hopefully) so let's see how you like it.

Hang In There
We Got This!

#bts #BTSArmy
#Music #Trying
#BipolarDisorder
#PanicDisorder
#Work
#MentalHealth
#AnxietyDisorder

Hello Friends.

Today is a day where work was slow, but it also felt productive at times. Things do not always turn out how we want them to, especially when uncertainty lingers in the air. Imagine, working at your job and you know a change is likely to occur.

You see it like a hurricane off the shore, aware that it may come into your path. While you remain in the cone of uncertainty, your mind can dances between dreams and reality.

It is difficult to express this idea to someone who has not ever experienced it before. It is as though you are mentally preparing for an issue to happen, but also aware it could entirely miss you.

Similarly, I am storm prepping in regards to my employment adjustments. I don't know when things will change, what will change, or how they will change at my job. But I know how important it is to remain mentally prepared for anything that can happen.

As someone who has anticipatory grief, it is not easy to shake that feeling. Did you know you can grieve over the loss of a job, or a friendship because that part of your life may "die"? I think you have experienced this once before. I do not know of many who have not.

Life is beautiful, but there are times where it is just as scary. The experiences we have are not always good ones and the fear sometimes feels bigger than the faith. However, the inner strength does not come from external relationships or from external influences. Inner strength to cope with uncertainty starts from within.

If you ever feel like you don't have faith... Sit in a chair. 🪑 Literally... Think about your chair. You automatically have faith because you know it is going to hold you up. No one had to tell you today that it will... You already know. This is where our inner beliefs are important.

In my case, though I may be facing a hurricane 🌀 and standing in the cone of uncertainty, I am doing what I can to prepare. This includes searching for a new job (an exit route) or battening down the hatches (staying in waiting, preparing,) for something to happen. But through it all... Allow your faith to become bigger than your fear...

#BipolarDisorder
#BTSArmy
#MentalHealth
#AnxietyDisorder
#PanicDisorder

Some of the best things in this world can come from feeling successful in what we do with our lives. Our jobs do not define who we are, but help us discover parts of ourselves we never knew existed.

I find it challenging to think about all the losses I experienced, just as you likely do. Working hard is an activity that we try to do as we attempt to become the best versions of ourselves at our jobs.

These discoveries of positives and negatives (opinions of ourselves) can help us translate them into strengths and weaknesses. However, our weaknesses do not mean we are weak people in particular, especially when it comes to completing challenging tasks.

My heart breaks 💔 when I think about all my previous jobs. I felt as if jobs were like relationships, you date them for a while, and if it does not work well, you find another place. This nearly killed my approach to working, though, because it meant I was struggling to find the right place.

At 39 years old, I feel scared as though I have so many wasted years behind me. However, this is not true. Sure, I am unable to "start" my career still because of the great saying, "You need experience" in order to get any type of experience in that job. I am struggling. But I am not giving up.

#Job
#BTSArmy
#Work
#BipolarDisorder
#AnxietyDisorder
#PanicDisorder

Have you ever had a nocturnal panic attack? When they happen, I begin to notice several things.

I may be thirsty.
Cold & Hot fluctuating
Quickened heart rate
Feeling like I could pass out
Feeling sick to my stomach
I start to think I am dying or that there is a major health crisis occurring.

It is a horrible sensation. I went to the emergency room 3 times for thess nocternal Attacks. Each time checked with my heart and was told the same thing. They're a panic attack.

When I asked 3 doctors about it, my psychiatrist, my primary care physician, and then a nurse practitioner, they all said it is due to a neurological imbalance. It is nothing that I do to bring these on. I thought maybe bad dreams, but when bad dreams occur, they do not happen because I make them.

What are your thoughts?

#PanicAttacks
#AnxietyDisorder
#BipolarDiorderType2
#Bipolar

Watching sunrise makes me feel lonelier than ever. In my thoughts, I feel grief has changed me. I like to spend my time alone to just be present with my emotions. I’m tired of people around me telling me to stay strong despite knowing their good intentions. I’m tired of everyone wanting me to be okay. It’s exhausting. Life goes on and that hurts. Why is grieving so lonely? #AnxietyDisorder #PanicDisorder #Grief #MentalHealth