Arthritis

Feeling defeated again. As usual my health has the final say always winning. I have to take another semester off from school. My dad has to help me get dressed, in the bathroom, and every time I get up. I’m also using a walker and 38yrs old. My back is way worse. I’m very still with limited range of motion due to severe sharp shooting stabbing pain. Doc called in a steroid for me. If not helping I’m suppose to go to the ER.

I couldn’t take this class in the summer and can’t take it this fall. I have this class and 1 more to finish my program in child development online. Then I will finally have my bachelors degree. In 2010 I had to drop out for having emergency back surgery due to Cauda Equina Syndrome. Then 10 months later in 2011 I had a 2nd back surgery due to severe congenital #SpinalStenosis . 2013 went back to school at the local community college for early childhood education. Graduated with associates degree 2016 going part time and another medical leave. 2022 decided to finish my bachelors degree online. Now that I’m this close with only 2 classes left I have to take more medical leaves. If I can’t do these practicums I will need to switch majors again. I was looking so forward to graduating May 2026.

Now I’m not sure when I’ll be done with my bachelors degree. It’s been a long road. Even if I can complete these 2 practicums I’m not sure what I’ll be able to do in this field. Not only is my spinal stenosis worse, I have #DegenerativeDiscDisease #Arthritis and now #Scoliosis all in my lumbar region. My cervical spine is bad also but not as bad.

I had a video call with my pain specialist. We squeeeeeed about my hips not hurting for a week. She was so happy. She knows how miserable I've been.
Then I said now that my hips are fine, I am fully aware of how awful my back hurts. I'm supposed to have a MRI of my lumbar and then we're gonna schedule injections. She's also gonna try to help me with the musculoskeletal pain in my haunches.
I've gotta be the luckiest boy around to have such amazing doctors. My pain specialist was trying to distract me during the cortisone injections and I outed myself as a practitioner of BDSM and I am a leather puppy. She replied "so are you a Dom or a sub? Ooh or a switch." I told her I'm neither. I'm a sadomasochist service puppy who helps people express their emotions in gentle outlets with no fear of being vulnerable. She was so excited to hear. It helped me focus on something other than pain.
She's kink friendly and trans accepting. I gotta let my PCP know about my new doctor's.
#Arthritis #FemoralAcetabularImpingement #Bursitis #BackPain

I was diagnosed with BPD at 14. My symptoms were extremely severe for a long time, but I’ve been in remission for years. I am 37. I also have CPTSD, OCD, generalized anxiety disorder and panic attacks, Major depressive disorder, Dysthymic disorder, ADHD, Fibromyalgia, Degenerative disc disease, Arthritis, Spinal stenosis, And other chronic illnesses that involve immense pain and other challenges. I’ve done a lot of work to reach a place of stability and I’ve been doing pretty OK. I got sick last year and I haven’t gotten better. It might be long Covid. I used to live an extremely active life, and now I can’t the body that I was in and the person that I was is no more I am grieving the life. I thought I would have and I am grieving who I used to be. I feel lost and alone, but I have been managing. My husband‘s brother is in the Coast Guard stationed in Alaska. We live in south east United States Tuesday. My husband left to go to Alaska for eight days to visit his brother. He won’t be back till next Tuesday. It’s only been a couple of days And I am really struggling. My thoughts are dark and my BPD is making an appearance. A lot of what I am feeling is valid and there’s a lot of unresolved pain that he has caused through our relationship. I thought I had dealt with that is surfacing. I don’t feel like I can trust him anymore. I also caught him in a small lie. Which reaffirms that I cannot trust him. I thought we had a good relationship, but I think I was fooling myself. He is not a bad husband and he’s not a bad Person. But he’s also, not Ben the husband that I need. I realize I have been really really lonely pretty much our whole relationship there’s certain things I ask him to do and he says he will do and then he doesn’t do them. Or things that I tell him are important to me and he says he hears me and then there’s no follow-through.. He knows my story. He knows what I’ve been through and he knows what I struggle with. I told him he should go on this trip because I wanted to be a good supportive wife, but now I regret saying that he didn’t take the time to have conversations and check in with me to see how I was processing the coming up trip and to see what he could do to make sure I would be OK and have a safety plan in place. I really just want him to come home. I need him to come home but he won’t. If the situation was reversed, I would try and get an earlier flight back. And he’s choosing not to. On one side I get it because this trip is important to himand spending time with his brother is important to him but also what about me? What about our family, he keeps saying how he wishes we were there with him, and he keeps experiencing stuff and seeing stuff that he wishes he could share. and that this is hard for him too. But in all the videos and pictures he sent he looks like he’s having a great time and I’m here broken into 1 million pieces with no one to help hold me together. I feel alone betrayed abandoned and left out. Things that I have felt throughout our marriage as a byproduct of his choices he asked me to give him Grace, but I have nothing left to give. I don’t know where this leaves us I think he expects to come home and everything’s just gonna be fine and that’s not the case. I don’t know what to do. I feel so defeated and letdown by the one person that’s supposed to have my back and the one person that supposed to be there for me for better or worse. And he’s not.

Tomorrow marks two years since the death of my border collie. Even though time has passed, I still remember the day like it was yesterday: taking them to the vet riddled with arthritis and pain and then being told the inevitable thing that there was nothing that could be done as he was very old and the best thing was to end his suffering. when it was done, at first I felt nothing but when I got home and I saw his blue lead, I broke down and let off a scream that can only be described as an agonising howl and the pain was unlike anything I have felt in years. The first few months were hard to deal with and so was the first anniversary last year. As time went on it became easier to deal with but at times I feel sudden episodes of sadness and have flashes of their face or memories of taking him for a walk. It affects my everyday life and I try my best to deal with it. I do keep in mind that I gave him a good life and did right by him in the end. Time doesn’t heal anything. It just makes it fade, but thankfully I’ve been surrounded by people who have helped ease the pain and hopefully, coming into the weekend I can continue to do so by making an effort to go out into the world and find some companionship.

Just something that I needed to get off my chest and I thank anyone who takes the time to read this can relate to it. and again, thank you for the acceptance into this community and that you all are finding your own ways of peace and meaning. 😔👍

#Grief #petloss #AutismSpectrumDisorder #AutismSpectrum #Autism #MentalHealth #Depression #Anxiety

Hi, my name is Type1diabeticfor50yr. I'm here because I have not had a day without major pain since I was in my 20s. Looking for advice/support on how to manage pain and how to communicate with doctors and others who don't understand. Coworkers my age think I must be lying/exaggerating because they have no pain. Even after many surgeries for carpal tunnel, cubital tunnel, tennis elbow, trigger fingers, frozen shoulders, and frequent cortisone injections I am not taken seriously. I like to work and keep complaints to a minimum, even though I hurt every day. Some days, I am in so much pain I cannot do my job. I also have arthritis and bone spurs in my hands and throughout my body. I have one finger joint that has fused, and others that are getting there. Having Type 1 diabetes for 50 years has certainly contributed, since it is an autoimmune disease and causes inflammation. I keep it well controlled and have no outward signs of the disease. I follow an anti-inflammatory diet. People think since I look healthy, I couldn't possibly be in pain. I joke and laugh a lot, so I'm perceived as happy and healthy. Humor is how I've always dealt with pain. Anyone else?

#MightyTogether #ChronicPain

Hi, my name is itsmefionaaa. I have fibromyalgia and psoriatic arthritis and life feels a little too “all pain no gain” at the moment.

#MightyTogether #Fibromyalgia #Arthritis

Hi, my name is Kaoz, I use they/it pronouns, am 23yrs old, and have *a lot* of health issues 😅 (POTS too but it wouldn't show up..) I hope to have some community and feel less alone in all of this, thanks in advance :]

#MightyTogether #Fibromyalgia #PTSD #Osteoarthritis #Anxiety #Depression #Migraine #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #AutismSpectrumDisorder #OCD #EatingDisorder #Arthritis #Schizophrenia