MyHeartHurts

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Feeling so sad + ashamed 😔

I was feeling really sad today, so I called my partner to talk. My sadness had nothing to do with our relationship, except that I always feel I could be a better partner to him. He is a real sweetheart and he was being supportive, but our conversation ended up making him feel stressed out and sad. He already had a long day, and he was enjoying his evening until I came along with my issues and ruined a perfectly good night for him. I couldn't make it better, and now I truly feel worse than I did before.

I feel like the worst kind of person. I feel like such a burden on someone I love with all my heart, on someone who deserves happiness and good things -- not a burden like me.

I just wanted to share this without ruining anyone else's night. If anyone has advice or just wants to keep a prayer or a good thought in their heart for us, I'd always appreciate that so much.

💜 #Shame #Depression #Sadness #ChronicIllness #Relationships #MyHeartHurts

16 comments
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#CheckInWithMe

Today I am lonely, sad, and lost.

How are you?

This problems with my job and marriage made me feel like a failure
Today's mental health goals are to try to find some positive
These are the reasons why I'm proud of myself: I haven't given up yet
I've been thinking a lot about my faith, trying to connect more with God
I'm feeling unsuccessful today...
I want to find peace, find joy, have a stronger connection with God
I hope I can overcome what I perceive are my failures
I love my children, my family, laughing
I will continue to try #struggleisreal #MyHeartHurts #depressionsucks #Feelinglikeafailure

70 comments
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Has any one ever used a legal aid lawyer? And is there such a thing as a regular lawyer that does pro bono work? #alienated parent #Divorced #Lawyers #Missingmydaughter #Ithurtssobad #Narcissistfather #Iwasafool #Hebrokeeveryrulejudgemade #MyHeartHurts #Pleasetellmeyourhonestopinion

It’s been 3 years since my daughter has lived with me, he enrolled her in a school without me knowing, I don’t see her for months. I thought that things would go back to the way they were which was shared custody, I was in huge denial, I never thought anyone could be so mean. I’m not perfect, but one thing I can tell you is that I followed all the judges rules each and every one, and raised my daughter the very best that I could, never said a bad word about her dad, or tell her how mean he actually is to me. And he has bought her love, and told her many lies. He has $$$, and I don’t! #Talkingtohimdoesntwork #Hetellsmeconstantlysheisjusttobusy #Heputherineverysportimagineable #Wantmydaughterback #Ifeelsodown #Hehaswreckedmyselfesteemandselfworth #Somedaysiwishiwouldjustdie #Thepainistomuch #Ilovedbeingamom #IwantmybabybackHELP #dontknowwhattodo #Mydaughterneedsamom #Shehasnosparetimetoseeme #Ilovehermorethananything

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Misunderstood

My mother send me a nasty message today saying that I don’t take care of myself and thats why I have mental health issues. She said stop advertising that it’s mental health when your making it worse for yourself. I feel so defeated.

#MyHeartHurts #Anxiety #Depression

14 comments
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Lack of empathy or anything from the husband 😔

Long story short... I’ve struggled with severe depression and anxiety for about 8 years now. It hit me hard the very last year that my husband (of 20 years) worked overseas (war zone) as personal security. He did this line of work for a total of 6 years. Eight years later, here I am, still struggling with my depression and anxiety. It was a really tough time in my life, especially with two young children. And as many of you know, with it comes horrible insomnia.

Some nights are better than others. My husband works on a 2 weeks on/2 weeks off schedule. So when he’s away it’s just me, therefore I just deal. And when I talk to him on the phone he’s so understanding, says how sorry he is that I have to deal with it on my own, wishes he was here to help me out with it, etc. Now when he’s home, it’s a completely different story. Had an episode the other night where I woke up at 2 AM and could not go back to sleep to save my life. So I tried waking him to let him know and see if he could just help me to get back to sleep, but nothing he just kept sleeping away. Eventually he did awake but just got angry with me saying the same ‘ol “just go back to sleep”. Then proceeds to say things like “here we go again” “it’s always something with you” “here, I’m awake, now what do you want” but all of it in a very angry or sarcastic tone. So of course all of this for me is just heartbreaking and so hurtful that I just start to sob. And try my best to just lay there and cry myself to sleep. While he lays inches from me and just goes back to sleep as I sob. No hug, no empathy... NOTHING. I can’t even imagine ever being like that toward him if he had an episode like that. I would stay up all night and just hold him. My heart just breaks more and more each time he reacts that way. And yes, I understand that I am not always easy to deal with, but to me it’s just so cruel to act the way he does. It’s one thing when he’s away and I’m truly alone and it’s another when he’s inches from me, yet I feel more alone than ever. Has anyone else dealt with a similar situation? #MyHeartHurts #noempathy #Insomnia

3 comments