I haven't been able to greive,in the ways others have been https://granted.That was taken, from me, out of https://malice.I will never, understand, why an entire group of people, would do https://that.I have asked why, a million https://times.When others passed, I was also attacked with,anger, assumptions and contemp, for having emotions and feelings,and expressing https://them.Everybody else is allowed to talk, discuss, reflect but me, no.Nothing. I am nothing in that family, no one of value, no significance, to them, ever.
Why do other people monitor and dictate, HOW, someone else should, feel about death and loss.
I saw the dynamic and manufactured anger then, all that resentment towards me, for others gossip, between certain family members. And then they All fall silent when asked.
I have been away, getting therapy, finding peace and to now know, I am Still a topic of, toxic conversation, is as common today, as when I grew https://up.I hope those who excluded me purposefully know, it was calculated by them, for https://years.I watched them go after mine and then, they abandoned them, just as https://quick.The name calling, assumptions, backstabbing, lies, gossip, hearsay....that is them, that is why, I called them out and do not have relationships, with https://any.And they'd stutter, yell, deny and become meaner, https://everytime.Im used to these, family disfunctions and roles, all https://play.Just because there is a dollar,$$$ attached, doesnt change or lesson the https://dysfunction.Ive been addressing it, for too https://long.I am sad, for them and hurt by https://them.Imagine planning for something beautiful and it is tainted by mockery and https://lies.Those family dynamics, are going to backfire because the impact, is destructive and https://cruel.That circle, I though for my future, just imploded some more.to deliberately, take away, that grieving process, with others, is https://cruel.I waited, to reach out,because of fear, fear of being rejected again, by the ones who, I reached out to https://before.I know now, but it never makes it hurt less, no matter how old I https://get.I wanted to know my Son, would be taken in, loved and not used as a pawn, by others https://involved.Thats https://it.What is wrong with people? Seriously,never thought Id let more heartache in, but now,it doesn't go https://away.All of my fears, insecurities and pain, only confirmed,this past three https://years.Nothing https://more.Thank you, for showing me exactly what I already felt.no big mystery solved.Confirmed,dysfunction and destruction, from family.
I will no longer relive this pain brought on by them.