saddness

♡ " So As Alot Of You Know From My Post's... That I Was A Mother.. And Lost A Baby.. I Have Recurring Nightmare's Every Year When His Anniversary Is Here... The Memorie's Of Losing A Tiny Little Human Being... On Replay... I'm In No Mood To Work Tomarrow... But I Have To Act Happy And Get It Over With... And Just Fake It Till I End My Shift... I Didn't Go Into Work Today Because I Had Nightmare's... And Pain In My Lower Back And Hip's And Ankle's... I'm So Miserable... And Sad Right Now... I Just Want To Curl Up In A Stuffed Animal Or Fleece Blanket... I Have Sat Off... " ♡ #heartbreak #exhusted ●▪︎○S.K.○▪︎●

° " So Lastnight I Texted My Sister... Out Of The Blue I Told Her That I Missed Her... And Her Response Was To Me... Very Negative... She Was Like Are You Ok?? ARE YOU DRUNK TEXTING ME... Um Wth I Said No That I'm Sober Thank You! This Is Why I Really Can't Communicate With Anyone Anymore... They Litterly Make Me Feel Like I Don't Matter Or Exist's... It's A Huge Struggle For Me To Stay Close With Any Of My Sibling's... And Then I Told Her That I Was Just Trying To Call Just To Say Hello... That's It.. And Then They Wonder Why I Distance Myself From All Of Them... " ° #saddness #Intrusive Thought's #Depression ○▪︎●▪︎●○ S.K. •▪︎○▪︎●○

I know this sounds stupid but only two days after the breakup he stopped using our Netflix account. And it made me more sad…how pathetic is that :(
#breakup #saddness #Anxiety #Broken

So, I'm on Instagram and I tried to reconnect with people I was once friends with. All these friendships ended because of me. I'll like a photo and make a comment but never get a response. I'm trying to rebuild a friend network even if it means starting over. It sucks that I miss these people but don't know how to get over it. They didn't do anything wrong. #Friendship #Christian #saddness

This might sound silly to people but I’m two weeks I stop watching my granddaughter die to me going back to work full time. Now I’m grateful that I can finally work full time but I’m the same sense my heart is very heavy. I’ve watched every Wednesday since she’s been born and I have such a sense f sadness cause she saved my life several times when I was suicidal. Her unconditional love for me and her smile and hugs stopped me every time.

#saddness

Feeling a little down today went to work felt fine until a customer at my job try to talk to me I froze didn’t say anything to her , had a Anxiety , just came home and I’m tired 😴 😥😭🥱 top it all had a sad news yesterday found out someone I once knew died from Coronavirus make it even worst so I had that on my mind today as well . #mental health #Anxiety #Anxiety Attacks #Depression #saddness #social anxiety

I feel like I'm losing myself like nobody would care if I end it tomorrow feel like I bother everyone #Depression #evilthoughts #saddness

It’s been a few days of being in a state of panic. I know my pmdd is getting worse each day. The other day standing in the shower crying to God to help stop me from the suicidal ideation.

I just started birth control Yaz - I don’t know if that’s amplified the depression?
There was an incident with neighbor. .
I’ve been drinking everyday to muffle the noise of the neighbor and the constant self criticism playing in my head. I just want to not hate myself.
I know all this is contributing. I know this and I know that. I’m stuck. I have no support. God usually helps me but I’m being lazy with him. I want human friends. I want someone who knows me. And cares. I’m so sad. I’m really ugly towards ppl right now. I also look ugly. I’m sorry if I sound like a jerk. I know I am. I hope someone will love me as I am. And I won’t push them away.
Anyone care. Anyone feedback. Anyone insight.
Also in relapse and cognitive brain skills are dead. I am dumb right now. I know this is stupid vent. But so overwhelmed tired in pain and all the mental stuff. Huge work thing Boss irritated with me - even though they’re actually taking advantage of me. Why am I always such a loser and a failure!! Tried to reach out for some support - no one available. I know I’m blessed but so much sucks right now. Oh lord help me I believe help my unbelief. Help me please help me #PMDD #Fibromyalgia #Anxiety #CheckInWithMe #Depression #Selfhate
#saddness