Hi Everyone ❤️ 👋🏾, I am in need of suggestion, support, advice, etc. I have been on an anti-depressant medication at the highest dose for about nine years now. I really couldn't say if it truly worked or helped me from day one when I started on the lowest dose. As a patient, I am naive and uneducated when it comes to anti-depressants and which one would help me. So, like most patients, we go along blindly following and accepting medication that our psychiatrist has prescribed for us to take. We put our total trust in this person to help prescribe the right medication and dose for us.
So, over the nine years, I went along with every suggestion the various psychiatrists gave me about upping dosages and adding medications. When asked if the medications were helping me, my answer was always, "I don't know. What are they supposed to do? How am I supposed to feel?" No one ever took the time to address or acknowledge my answers, and I didn't know what to do. So, I continued to be a guinea pig and take whatever medications they prescribed.
I couldn't turn to my family's for help. One reason why they had no idea I was in crisis, they didn't know I was in intense therapy and that I was taking medications. Two, my family didn't have any point of reference to even help me. Three, they didn't care about me! I was spiraling emotionally and mentally, and no one asked me about me. If I was okay and did I need help? I tried to reach out to a family member by sharing my suicidal thoughts and feelings and that I have begun thinking about a plan. Their response to me was, "Oh, we don't do that or think that way! You need to pray 🙏🏽 and give everything to God!" Yes, I do believe in God and His plan for my life. 🤔, in the midst of my mental health crisis, I have to be honest. My thoughts weren't focused on God. It was focused on ending the pain I was burdened with.
It wasn't until three weeks ago that my psychiatrist changed. I don't believe in accidents or coincidences. I believe in my life. Everything happens for a reason. The moment I met my new psychiatrist, I knew my mental health journey was about to change. The doctor looked over my medication history and immediately said, "I am not going to add nor change any of your medications at this point. I want you to have a test completed that may provide us with more definitive answers. This test I want you to take is a generics test to show how your DNA responds and breaks down different classes of medications." I promise you, I heard the words, "Hallelujah!" ringed through my head!
I had the test performed, and within a weeks time, I had the results. With this particular test, I had to meet with my new psychiatrist and a pharm doctor to go over my test results. The pharm doctor is the one that broke down the test results in depth so I could and my psychology could understand. We discovered that my DNA does not require a high dose of medication. In fact, I require a low dose for it to have an impact. Sadly, all of my medications have increased over the years to the highest dose. All I said to my psychiatrist is that I wished one (just one) of the many doctors I see would have thought of this test a long time ago.
So now it has been decided that the best course of treatment for me moving forward is to stop trying the anti-depressant I was on and try a new medication. They believe that if my original medication ever worked, it only worked for the first two weeks if that long. They discussed options for a few minutes and then explained the plan to me so I understood what was going to happen next. They answered all of my questions. I was concerned about suddenly stopping my original anti-depressant just to begin a new medication. I explained that I the past, I stopped that medication cold turkey, and it was the worst experience I've ever endured with medication! I didn't want to stop at the time and simply couldn't afford to pay for the medication. But everyone worked out, and I started back on it.
So our game plan was to taper me off the original medication over the course of three to four weeks while introducing the new medication in a low dose. As I decreased the old medication, I would increase the new medication. This is where my problems have begun.
I am going through the worst anti-depressant withdrawal symptoms since I went cold turkey years ago. 😫 On top of the withdrawal symptoms, I believe I'm having an allergic reaction to the new medication. So now I have to taper off both medications and start a whole new one.
This is where you all come in with help!
My head constantly feels like I have a lingering headache or migraine 😫 😩 all the time. When I'm able to sleep 😴 it is extremely difficult for me to wake up and open my eyes. I feel like I'm trying to move an elephant 🐘 when I'm trying to open my eyes. I have talked to my psychiatrist and searched the internet, and everything says the same thing, "This is part of the withdrawal process when tapering of anti-depressants."
I'm just trying to find ways to help provide me some relief as my body goes this process.
Has anyone else been through this or something similar before? Can anyone help? I know there isn't a magic remedy, but there is something I can try to help me.
I appreciate everyone's advice, suggestions,and input. Thank you.