bullies

After years of experience with nursing and reading articles in the local paper about the hospital you would have thought I would have learned to never read the comment section. But when I saw a couple of my articles were on Yahoo curiosity got the better of me. Now I wish it hadn't.

Even knowing these were some pretty tragic specimens of humanity didn't make it hurt any less for being called weird or odd for trying to understand my daughter's autism or having both of us verbally abused for wanting better things for her in school, in life, generally. I will take the really vile comments about abortion and murder for the clearly ludicrous trolling attempts at getting a reaction that they were. What stung the most for me was reading 2 comments from parents of autistic kids who must be non verbal telling me I should be grateful my daughter can speak (believe me I really am) and nobody wants to hear about kids like my daughter because she can speak on an article where I was talking about getting an insight into how her stims help her. I count my blessings for my kids every day and my writing for The Mighty is about things that are close to my heart.

I know writers need a thick skin so I'm gonna stuff my face tonight then get up tomorrow and wonder why I bothered letting it upset me and start writing again I'm sure. But I've learned my lesson. Remember the first rule of Troll Club. Never read the comments section unless it's on here

#Trolls #bullies #headuphigh #chinup #dontfeedthetrolls

I’ve had a tough week. Started with homophobic amuse being thrown at me. I’m almost 30, I thought I was past all the name calling. Worst part is, I was buying a new car and it was the valet guys who did it. Took me straight back to shit high school days and bullies :(

This poem is heavily influenced by and incorporates portions of the lyrics of the song "Enemy," written by Ryan McCombs and performed by Drowning Pool. As such, it is not an entirely original work and may not be appropriate here. Nevertheless, I'm sharing it because that is what you do when you sort of write something.

The words you use aren’t kind, and I’ve heard them a thousand times

And they don’t make what you believe the truth

You hate me, you loathe me

So you scream at me hoping that I will bleed from your wounds

I make you sick, so you can’t breathe

So you decided we had to be enemies

I’ve done nothing to you, but you can’t let it be

We didn’t have to be enemies.

I walk the

High road away from you.

Only God knows what I did to you.

This is the life I have, and what I choose

Is to walk the high road, the high road away from you

I walk away, I walk away, because you wanted to be enemies.

All I wanted was to be left alone, to spend my days in solitude

What I’m healing from is none of your concern

Just leave me in peace to tend my wounds

Your threats and your unkind words

Make it harder for me, and won’t heal you.

A truth that has surely eluded

You.

Deep inside, do you know that you are the enemy?

Change me, rearrange me, make me your enemy.

Make me your enemy.

I walk the

High road away from you

Only God knows what I did to you.

This is the life I have, and what I choose

Is to walk the high road, the high road away from you.

I walk away, I walk away, because you wanted to be enemies.

Today I got the nerve up to report 3 bullies at work. It was so bad that it triggered the depression in my PTSD and I had to check myself into the hospital to protect myself from harming myself. #Depression #Emptiness #fearful #Suicide #self -care #Love yourself

I had a wonderful post and then I hit something on my computer and lost it all.

I'm a survivor of childhood bullying and of spiritual abuse. What do you do when the bullies always win?  What do you do when it's impossible to figure out the truth?  What do you do when everyone can "prove" they are right and use facts to "prove" their point?  What do you do when you are afraid to say what you think because you fear being blamed, shamed, and shunned, even among people who have been welcoming to you?   And what do you do when underneath all of t hose questions is the belief, "I don't know, and it's impossible to find any answers."
I also have debt, a child with a disability, and multiple health issues, both physical and mental.  I'm so tired of doctors.  My only role in life is to keep the health care sector of the GDP pumped up.  The day I die, several health care providers will either go bankrupt or see a serious drop in income.   
I'm tired of people being at each other's throats and feeling like I'm "supposed" to do something about it but I can't.  I feel as if my point of view is not welcome.