Childhoodtrauma

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"The silence that shaped me"

“The Silence That Shaped Me”

A true story of pain, survival, and rediscovery.

My name is not important here — what matters is the story I carry within me.

The person I’ve become today has been shaped not just by choices, but by silent battles I never asked for… but had to survive.

My childhood was supposed to be filled with innocence and laughter — but some memories left marks far deeper than bruises. I was very young when I first encountered something that no child should ever experience. A trusted neighbor, someone we used to visit without fear, took advantage of our innocence. What happened in that closed room was confusing and terrifying. I didn’t understand what he was doing at the time — only that it felt wrong. Somehow, I managed to run away. But the fear didn’t leave with me.

The second incident hit even closer to home. It was a cousin — someone I had grown up calling ‘bhai’. I had no knowledge of what was right or wrong, no awareness of how to protect myself. It started subtly — an inappropriate video, a misleading word, calling it a “game.” Slowly, his behavior crossed all limits. There were moments when I was asleep, and he would violate my space without a word. I remained silent. Too scared to speak. Too young to even fully understand. And that silence slowly became my prison.

The third time, it was yet another cousin. This one lived with us for a while at my grandmother’s house. His approach was different — almost gentle. I was still a child, and I mistook the wrong kind of attention for affection. I didn’t understand boundaries. Eventually, I realized it was wrong, and I stepped away. But by then, I had already begun to question my own worth.

These experiences didn’t just end in childhood — they left a lasting imprint on the way I saw myself, the world, and relationships. I couldn’t sit still in one place emotionally. I struggled with self-worth, with fear, and often with guilt that was never mine to carry. I kept pretending I was okay. I kept running from the shadows of my past.

Until something changed.

Amidst this chaos, I met someone — unexpectedly. A boy, living far away, who entered my life with a kind heart and a gentle soul. In a world where I had forgotten how to trust, he made me feel safe. He didn’t know about my past, but he recognized my present pain. Instead of running from it, he stood by me — with patience, with care, and with love that asked for nothing in return.

For the first time, I began to feel human again.

I began to believe that I could be loved — not despite my past, but simply for who I am.

Even now, there are nights when old memories visit.

Even now, I struggle with things I can’t always explain.

But now… I have someone who doesn’t demand perfection — he walks beside me through the imperfection.

This is my story — real, raw, and unfiltered.

Not for sympathy. Not for attention.

But to remind someone out there that you are not alone.

What happened to us was never our fault.

And healing, though not instant, is possible — when love is patient, and when we begin to forgive ourselves for surviving.

*This story may tell about the author she wants help anonymously*##Childhoodtrauma #Trauma #realstory #story #unspokenwords #MentalHealth

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Long Covid, Chronic Illness, and Childhood Trauma

Hello everyone, I have been dealing with long Covid since February 2024. I have gotten better since but still have several health issues and bad flares almost daily.

I have been doing alot of reading on the connection between chronic stress, childhood trauma, and chronic illnesses like long Covid. I believe my long Covid symptoms got significantly worse after periods of chronic stress and trauma.

I know that my nervous system was hanging on by a thread before I had Covid. I believe I got long Covid partly due to the virus and due to previous trauma in childhood and adulthood.

What do you guys think of this idea? Do you think you were struggling emotionally or mentally prior to having long Covid? Did you have years of chronic stress and trauma as a child? I want to hear others experiences

#longcovid #Childhoodtrauma #ChronicIllness #Healing

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Questions

How do I reconcile with the fact that I have not been loved my entire life but that I have been abused? Can abusers love? I doubt it…
What about me and my feelings?

I’m not a pawn to be used when others feel like it. I am a living breathing person and I have needs too. #Childhoodtrauma #PTSD #MentalHealth #NarcissisticPersonalityDisorder

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One month

It's been one month since I last spoke to my mom and it's been really hard. She's been gaslighting me all my life and I finally had enough of her bullshit. There were times when she was nice and nonjudgmental but as soon as I mentioned my relationship, my illness, or my childhood she would get very mean. I know it's better this way. It just sucks.

#Childhoodtrauma #Abuse #PTSD #Relationships

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What have you had to unlearn from your childhood?

Unlearning (and subsequently relearning) things from when we were younger is a lifelong process. And it doesn’t even need to — though of course it can and does — relate to chilldhood trauma. It can “simply” be ideals, values, opinions, or ways of thinking and living that we no longer agree with. We also can grow out of things naturally as we age, and that’s valid and expected too.

What do you find yourself unlearning? How has the process been — painful or powerful?

#MightyMinute #CheckInWithMe #Childhoodtrauma #MentalHealth #Anxiety #Depression #ChronicPain #ChronicIllness #RareDisease #Disability #Grief #PTSD

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Good evening everyone #mywrite #Childhoodtrauma #PTSD #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #SchizoaffectiveDisorder

I’m sick of living in a country that is run by misogynistic pigs and enabling women, i’m tired, so tired #needrest #Selfcheck i always feel better though, after i write x

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Remember This As Your Week Begins

Good morning! Please take these reminders with you as you go through your week ❤️ Always know you have a safe space here, people who will listen , who care, and truly relate ❤️ Post a positive quote or affirmation to help yourself and each other get ready for the day! #Childhoodtrauma #CPTSD #PTSD #ChildhoodAbuse #mighty #checkin

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