Complex Post-traumatic Stress Disorder

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Do they believe they are teaching me something or are they really this stupid?#avm #CPTSD

I know, Im now known as the town psycho, thanks to her, the Harts,Cindy, Corrin,his gazelle friends, the dispensary staff,coffee place and phone https://guy.All the places I frequent but have never once displayed anything of a loss of self.
Im confused something has been said Im not prevy to and that is concerning. I have a https://son.You can call me names,but treat my son, as a pawn,in your sick https://game.You bring strangers into my personal information and accounts, stalk my house, go through my belongings, watch me through my phone with no regard for anyones wellbeing, but not once have you ever spoken directly to https://me.Three years and now you feel Im upset over nothing? Worried the truth is coming out, what you did,directly to my home, to me,my family. Now he is torn, alone and https://backtracking.He doesn't face consequences, or take accountability because you taught him https://that.He does not apologize or resolve anything.you showed, he is the only one who will take care of his mother, when she says jump, he will, because she pays him with things, promises, strokes his ego and he does no wrong, ever, her poor https://son.She told him, convinced him, his wife was jealous of https://him.What type of mother tells a man a woman, is jelly on a man, what? She has power, money and shameless in heart and no,spirit.I tried to turn to the women in my life and guess what? They all sucked, two faced,unloyal,plastic,fakest group of women, Ive ever met.
Yes, And I stand by it, six freaking years https://later.Not one has proven me wrong https://yet.Mean Girls Club, never my deal.do not speak of me https://again.Get help.

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Do they believe they are teaching me something or are they really this stupid?#avm #CPTSD

I know, Im now known as the town psycho, thanks to her, the Harts,Cindy, Corrin,his gazelle friends, the dispensary staff,coffee place and phone https://guy.All the places I frequent but have never once displayed anything of a loss of self.
Im confused something has been said Im not prevy to and that is concerning. I have a https://son.You can call me names,but treat my son, as a pawn,in your sick https://game.You bring strangers into my personal information and accounts, stalk my house, go through my belongings, watch me through my phone with no regard for anyones wellbeing, but not once have you ever spoken directly to https://me.Three years and now you feel Im upset over nothing? Worried the truth is coming out, what you did,directly to my home, to me,my family. Now he is torn, alone and https://backtracking.He doesn't face consequences, or take accountability because you taught him https://that.He does not apologize or resolve anything.you showed, he is the only one who will take care of his mother, when she says jump, he will, because she pays him with things, promises, strokes his ego and he does no wrong, ever, her poor https://son.She told him, convinced him, his wife was jealous of https://him.What type of mother tells a man a woman, is jelly on a man, what? She has power, money and shameless in heart and no,spirit.I tried to turn to the women in my life and guess what? They all sucked, two faced,unloyal,plastic,fakest group of women, Ive ever met.
Yes, And I stand by it, six freaking years https://later.Not one has proven me wrong https://yet.Mean Girls Club, never my deal.do not speak of me https://again.Get help.

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Monitoring me, shows me, who you are#CPTSD

Every entree, is downloaded for their https://case.After I write, a data record comes across the entire page, hitting on keywords throughout my essays.it is shown on my screen. For two years, collecting my private diaries. I cannot believe the level of harassment, lies and stalking this woman has gone https://to.Ive been followed, approached in public, threatened,hacked, catfished, recorded and https://watched.That is sociopath level https://shit.A dozen of her closest friends, lied to them about extremely personal things in my life and then,she sets me up to loose my temper, so I'd react, flip out, break the law, whatever!My husband and her went out of their way to phase me https://out.That is sick, wrong and now Im to walk away quietly? https://No.They can have eachother and take me to https://court.I have nothing, do it, please, I quit, I give up and I no longer will fight, an 80 year old sick, bored https://gossip.Nope.I feel sad, for all the women and men, she involved. They will never apologize, I will. I believe in accountability and change, real growth with work, not paid maid service.
It is embarrassing and shameful, for allowing you to run a family that https://way.Get help.

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Monitoring me, shows me, who you are#CPTSD

Every entree, is downloaded for their https://case.After I write, a data record comes across the entire page, hitting on keywords throughout my essays.it is shown on my screen. For two years, collecting my private diaries. I cannot believe the level of harassment, lies and stalking this woman has gone https://to.Ive been followed, approached in public, threatened,hacked, catfished, recorded and https://watched.That is sociopath level https://shit.A dozen of her closest friends, lied to them about extremely personal things in my life and then,she sets me up to loose my temper, so I'd react, flip out, break the law, whatever!My husband and her went out of their way to phase me https://out.That is sick, wrong and now Im to walk away quietly? https://No.They can have eachother and take me to https://court.I have nothing, do it, please, I quit, I give up and I no longer will fight, an 80 year old sick, bored https://gossip.Nope.I feel sad, for all the women and men, she involved. They will never apologize, I will. I believe in accountability and change, real growth with work, not paid maid service.
It is embarrassing and shameful, for allowing you to run a family that https://way.Get help.

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Shutting it off#CPTSD #avm

This has caused me pain and not all https://emotional.I am hurting and it scares https://me.I sat there watching my life and I am alone because of https://it.I would rather process it and not be taken advantage of, this https://way.I haven't had clarity until I left this house.it is not a healthy environment for a family, let alone any dynamic is lost to other peoples damage https://done.I took accountability and spoke, they have not and that was set up that https://way.I am heartbroken and alone, have been for too long and it has changed me, made me bitter, pessimistic and lost faith in compatability https://altogether.When I loose my faith, its https://done.I gave endless opportunities for them to be transparent and honest about everything for the last three years and they both decided, I was not worth the effort, the time or energy emotionally to fight for, to engage in any repairing or https://resolving.They are hurt but wont express it, they are lost and wont admit https://it.Ive given grace, time and patience.it is not forced by me, I wait and they refuse to address https://anything.That told me my https://place.Actions do tell me everything and avoidance, is an https://action.I can be, my best self for me, that is the goal.it doesn't take away the pain of watching them become bitter, angrier and more defensive than https://before.I will never forgive her,his cousins, her friends and the people who played my life for https://fun.Tell Sue and Karen, Ted's turn to know her truths since mine were free https://game.I dont play nice when pushed over and over https://again.Have him come on by, time to spill the tea https://bitches.My home was taken out by so called friends of friends, enemies, two faced backstabbing jelly women who hate their choices and believe in serving https://men.Not my type of https://friends.Tell Ted, stop by. I've got Her https://Tea.This goes back twenty years, good gossip, all her https://secrets.Then all of you can compare notes, timeliness and see who fckd who, hows that sound? Then you can tell your parents, oh, he can tell your Son too, your church folk and your https://employer.Sounds good to https://me.Keep that feather in your https://cap.Tell Sue, you are not a reformed man.

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Shutting it off#CPTSD #avm

This has caused me pain and not all https://emotional.I am hurting and it scares https://me.I sat there watching my life and I am alone because of https://it.I would rather process it and not be taken advantage of, this https://way.I haven't had clarity until I left this house.it is not a healthy environment for a family, let alone any dynamic is lost to other peoples damage https://done.I took accountability and spoke, they have not and that was set up that https://way.I am heartbroken and alone, have been for too long and it has changed me, made me bitter, pessimistic and lost faith in compatability https://altogether.When I loose my faith, its https://done.I gave endless opportunities for them to be transparent and honest about everything for the last three years and they both decided, I was not worth the effort, the time or energy emotionally to fight for, to engage in any repairing or https://resolving.They are hurt but wont express it, they are lost and wont admit https://it.Ive given grace, time and patience.it is not forced by me, I wait and they refuse to address https://anything.That told me my https://place.Actions do tell me everything and avoidance, is an https://action.I can be, my best self for me, that is the goal.it doesn't take away the pain of watching them become bitter, angrier and more defensive than https://before.I will never forgive her,his cousins, her friends and the people who played my life for https://fun.Tell Sue and Karen, Ted's turn to know her truths since mine were free https://game.I dont play nice when pushed over and over https://again.Have him come on by, time to spill the tea https://bitches.My home was taken out by so called friends of friends, enemies, two faced backstabbing jelly women who hate their choices and believe in serving https://men.Not my type of https://friends.Tell Ted, stop by. I've got Her https://Tea.This goes back twenty years, good gossip, all her https://secrets.Then all of you can compare notes, timeliness and see who fckd who, hows that sound? Then you can tell your parents, oh, he can tell your Son too, your church folk and your https://employer.Sounds good to https://me.Keep that feather in your https://cap.Tell Sue, you are not a reformed man.

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My entries are gone#avm #CPTSD

I was taken offline and now my original writings are https://gone.Four years of my memories, my private thoughts and https://diaries.Who does that? Oh, yes, https://her.Nine years ago, I made a promise and I am grateful for having known myself enough,to be able to recognize my problems and address them.it is frustrating that the people I thought I knew, cannot or will not communicate or follow through with https://me.I had relationships, as an adult, concenting, grown adult age.And? He, has dozens, I never knew https://of.I did not hate or cause his families problems.They, are, the https://problem.Telling people Im crazy,sleeping around and stealing stuff? That Im abusive when he phased me out, years https://ago.What the hell? I sold an appliance and my ring, out of panick, at my https://worst.My heart is broken, my son knows things he never should of known and someone is dying from https://lying.Its sad, for nothing and https://cruel.I am not that and I will not engage.

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My entries are gone#avm #CPTSD

I was taken offline and now my original writings are https://gone.Four years of my memories, my private thoughts and https://diaries.Who does that? Oh, yes, https://her.Nine years ago, I made a promise and I am grateful for having known myself enough,to be able to recognize my problems and address them.it is frustrating that the people I thought I knew, cannot or will not communicate or follow through with https://me.I had relationships, as an adult, concenting, grown adult age.And? He, has dozens, I never knew https://of.I did not hate or cause his families problems.They, are, the https://problem.Telling people Im crazy,sleeping around and stealing stuff? That Im abusive when he phased me out, years https://ago.What the hell? I sold an appliance and my ring, out of panick, at my https://worst.My heart is broken, my son knows things he never should of known and someone is dying from https://lying.Its sad, for nothing and https://cruel.I am not that and I will not engage.

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We can be sad about letting go and still know it’s the right thing to do. We can miss what is gone without putting ourselves back there. We can remember without reliving. We can release connections and reminders that no longer serve where we’re headed. We can move forward, every single one of us.

#DissociativeIdentityDisorder #ComplexPosttraumaticStressDisorder #TraumaRecovery

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Breath
Focus on breathing

Eat, drink, get groceries
Shower

Take small steps
Small actions are enough

You ARE moving forward
It IS okay if it is slow

Take courage
Be brave

Care for yourself
Care for the children

Somehow,
things WILL be okay
Somehow

#artastherapy #CPTSD #AbusiveRationships #ChronicIllness #GettingAwayFromAbuse #RoadToHealing

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