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    Tough choices

    My wife is waiting to hear back about what day her new job starts. She went for an interview last week and the manager said they were planning to start either April 4 or the following week. But she did get the job. So that's the good thing!

    The hard thing is we got a call yesterday from the place where her daughter (high functioning) does her autism therapy and they told us her insurance changed and they don't take it. So either we get her back on the plan she used to be on or services end Friday. The only way to change that is to actually call them, which gives my wife extreme anxiety. She's gonna try because if they can change it back, keeping her at the same place would be easiest routine-wise. But the other side is if we keep her on this new plan, it covers another place in town that does the same type of therapy but they also offer respite care and other services all inclusive that we have to go to outside agencies to get since this other place doesn't have those. So, all told, this might be better for all of us in the longer term. But the current place is getting her ready to return to traditional school. And if she goes to the new place, the easiest thing to do would be keep her in online school cuz, while from a therapy standpoint she is ready to go back to school, from a practical standpoint of socialization and what her individual needs are, she wouldn't do well. She's still struggling to do practically anything independently. There just never seems to be a moment for us to enjoy anything or catch a break... #Autism #OppositionalDefiantDisorder #Insurance #choices

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    “There are two ways through life…”


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    Choice #meds #choices

    I chose not to take my meds today. Now i need to see if this becomes a pattern or a fluke.

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    Control: #Depression #Anxiety #PTSD #MentalHealth

    One of the hardest things I am learning about managing my mental health is related to control. Where I live we are in the midst of a 1 in 60 year flood. This is the road west out of town.

    Thankfully we can still get out on the east side. There are some things in my life I can control and obviously some things like weather , that I can’t control.

    What I can do though is choose how I respond to those out of control things. I have not made completely smart choices lately and I am paying the price for that. I hope this week I will do better.

    #Relationships #ChronicIllness #Faith #choices

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    Choose how you want to react

    What is boils down to, we all face challenges, we all have our ups and downs, we are all human but we have the power to decide how we react to life.
    #choices #React #whodoyouwanttobe #challenge #mindset

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    Stormfront building #Pain #Depression #Anxiety #choices #Marriage #noaffection #baddecisions

    I've been stuck in a marriage for the last few years that has been uncommunicative and lacking any intimacy. We tried marriage therapy, but it was a disaster. He wasn't willing to be honest and vulnerable, the therapist wasn't familiar with trauma or BPD, so I kept getting phrases like "you're too hard to please", "he's damned if he does and damned if he don't", and "you're just too needy", which is where my individual therapist pulled me out of the sessions. My husband was supposed to continue by himself, but said he was only going to figure out how to fix me, he didn't have any issues. He works 3rd shift despite being told that my being alone is harmful, but he likes thirds because he doesn't want to mess with the supervisors. So now I'm sick of not having any intimacy, not even a hug unless I specifically ask for one, and my mind has started straying, but I don't want to step outside of my vows. I stay only because I can't work and I need his insurance to keep getting my mental health care, but it's like roommates with insurance benefits. I'm tired of this empty hole that used to have love and I'm on the verge of making some very bad decisions just to feel like I'm worth being loved and cherished.

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    Hmmm what am I going to pick today... So many choices lol.... Oh wait they choose me! Silly me 🤣😂😁🤩 😜 #ADHD #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Depression #PTSD

    I love that we can be open honest and transparent here and not have to be ASHAMED!!! 🥰 You all!

    Try to enjoy your day and my 1st ❤️ language is Acts of Service and I get the most joy out of life helping others so this is an open invitation to reach out to me with absolutely no judgement☮️💜

    I mean I only match with all 9 symptoms of BPD so I've probably done it haha.

    Oh and was always the I can handle it myself you're person but it feels pretty damn good to hear my therapist and my psychiatrist say they are proud of me... (And I hate compliments) I have a long way to go but they work wonders... Probably would be a better idea to not wait 45 years to check 'em it though 😁😂🤣... What can I say... Live sand learn!


    A fantastic culmination of lived experiences have created me

    What a fantastic culmination of lived experiences have created me.
    Every single day I have lived has influenced the me that emerged to experience tomorrow.
    And what an either beautiful or tragic cycle that is to live.
    Every single day you are backed by every other you from every other day.
    But today is your day and you get to decide what to keep and what to move away from.
    and how fantastic that we get to decide every day.
    #cycles #movingon #Poem #Recovery #choices


    Choices #choices

    Every choice that we make, no matter how small - reinforces the perception of #control and self-efficacy. And when we feel we are in control, we feel #Motivated - as to #motivate ourselves, we must feel in control.
    Even if making a decision delivers no benefit, we still want the #freedom to #choose .
    If you are struggling to complete something, some task - then CHOOSE to do the most interesting part of the task first.

    When things are at their most measurable, WE should ask each other questions that begin with "WHY" - this helps in linking something hard to a choice we care about - and then it makes the task easier.
    But if you want a mere escape, you want diversions - then the more choices you will be given or you'll seek for, the less satisfied you'll feel. And then you must be able to choose what you want to give up.
    What are your #Thoughts on it?

    P.S. This piece of writing has been #inspired by the #Book , The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg. If you want answers to your own 'why we do, what we do', then this book is a must read.
    Your comments are welcome.