Hypertension

#Cancer

Curious if anyone else has had similar symptoms. I had radiation to the base of my skull in November of 2021. Around March of this year, I started having episodic migraines. The number of days they persist has been increasing, and the interval of days in between has been decreasing. Also, my BP keeps swinging between hypertension and hypotension (too low)...more often hypotension. Cardiologist says heart is normal, oncologist saw nothing on brain except the original tumor. Sound familiar to anyone else?

Last week my younger sister was put on a Ventilator, along with Chest Tubes and Feeding Tube. She is in her 50’s and has been a smoker her whole life. She did not take care of herself, hadn’t seen a doctor in decades, didn’t eat properly and self medicated for years. At this stage of her lung disease, her prognosis is poor. What makes this worse, is It hasn’t even been a year since the death of another younger sibling. Of my remaining family, I see have one sibling struggling with Mental Illness, one who almost died from a Hypertensive Crisis due to untreated High Blood Pressure and another who was born with severe scoliosis as well as many features akin to Achondroplasia.
The differences in the manifestations of our CPTSD are as varied as the differences in how we learned to cope/survive as children and ultimately as adults.
So little is written about the history of our lives, from a family system perspective.
How so many of the choices we made, were not from a thoughtful place (Frontal Cortex) but, from the Amygdala, a place of “fight or flight.”
How a childhood history of violence and abuse can result in life limiting diseases.
Some literature speaks to how people who have experienced trauma as a child, are more at risk for Heart Disease, Diabetes, additions…etc. However, these studies do not reflect the whole picture, that involves the family. Studies do not address the feelings of sadness and helplessness, that come from witnessing a sibling’s struggles, chronic illness and death. How sometimes being around each other in our attempt to comfort and support can be triggering because of the shared experiences as children.
My heartache is tinged with anger that my beautiful siblings, the ones I love so, the ones I tried to protect as children, when I was a child myself, didn’t have the lives they deserved. No one truly understands how difficult it is to caste off the shroud of abuse. To be free of shame, fear and self doubt…unless you’ve been there yourself.
I know I’m at a dark place right now. One filled with anticipatory grief and anger. It is a place I worked so hard to reconcile through out the years but, it is where I know I need to be and not where I will stay.
There needs to be more written about our roles within the family as well as the family’s role in us. Especially, as it pertains to a family history of violence and abuse. This too pertains to whether you were an only child or one of several.
I can’t help wonder how many of you have faced or are facing the same losses or challenges.
Before I finish, thank you for giving me this opportunity to share and process further. If I’ve said or shared anything that can lead to misunderstanding, I am sorry. This is what’s true for me, or where I am at in my pain, just at this moment.

So for the last 4 nights I've taken 4mg of Haldol and its not working. I took it 4 hours ago and I just cannot get to sleep for the life of me. I'm wide awake and super hungry.

My doctor told me he was putting me on less than half the typical dose because hes afraid it'll interfere with the Invega Trinza I'm taking. He prescribed 2mg and said if it doesn't work to tae a 2nd pill but even THAT doesn't work.

I'm going to schedule a virtual appointment to discuss putting me on something stronger. I feel like maybe he didn't take me seriously when I told him I'm not sleeping. He did say "Well you LOOK fine." Like was I supposed to be crying and begging for help?

Maybe I'll go wash a dish and eat a warmed up blueberry muffin with some butter. My tummy is calm now thank goodness and I didn't get sick after I ate dinner tonight. It was a long rough day for me so I need some comfort that will hopefully help me calm down and sleep. I've got the home nurse coming at 10:30 and then I've got an appointment with my PCP to discuss hypertension medications. Its going to be another long day ahead.

So at 9:30am I have a virtual appointment with psych to address the super toxic anxiety and hopefully get put on some meds to take as-needed. I've tried talking to psych in the past about my anxiety and he basically said Nope get your PCP to do it. So I'm not sure how this is going to go... I'm super anxious about it. What if I oversleep/sleep thru my alarm? What if he doesn't want to help? Hes usually a really nice guy who really cares but that last time was just odd.

Then in the afternoon I have an appointment with my PCP's PA to address the hypertension issues I'm having. For the last 2 months my BP has been running high enough to worry about. 2 weeks ago after walking in my hallway for 5 minutes my BP was 170/99... yeah, its bad. But what if my BP is normal and they brush it off? What if they don't take it seriously? My at home nurse is veery concerned about it, says I'm a high risk for strokes. I'm already a high risk for strokes due to having secondary polycythemia from the testosterone I am taking. I'm just... I can't sleep. I'm too worried.

Then after I get home from that appointment I have to clean my apartment. I've tried doing that for the last 2 days but its been so hot and humid and I've had trouble breathing. I also can't bend down because I had back surgery just about a month and a half ago. Its so stressful.

I hope I get thru tomorrow ok.

This week is going to be so difficult. Tomorrow morning I've got a virtual appointment with psych to see about getting on an as-needed anxiety medication and then later in the day I've got an appointment with my doctor to address the stage 2 hypertension and get on some meds for that. Then Wednesday morning I've got therapy and then later in the day my zoloft refill is getting delivered. Then Friday I've got an inspection of my apartment by the organization that pays my rent because my building is infested with bed bugs and they've decided not to renew the lease this year and are making me move. They say I can't take my belongings with me when I move, and are planning to replace the furniture and my clothes. I'm so stressed and anxious right now. I just need some peace and quiet in my life so that I can get a handle on things.

I'm super low on food and have spent too much money on take-out food this month already. My food stamps card is empty till the 11th so I have to wait till Thursday to order more food. I have no meat in my fridge. All I've got are eggs and cans of cabbage.

What I REALLY want is to get together with a friend for some ice cream and to go play Scrabble in a park. I think that would really cheer me up a lot. I'm a simple man of simple needs. Unfortunately none of my friends want to see or spend time with me. They all live at least a half hour away from me and claim its too hard to spend time with me due to the distance. I know if I had a car I'd make time to see the people that matter to me but I guess sometimes we cannot hope that people will be as compassionate as we ourselves would be.

On June 22nd I had spinal surgery. I had 2 forms of stenosis, a annular tear, and epidural lipomatosis, so they did a spinal fusion, debulking of the fat, decompression, and put in screws and a plate. It sucked but the surgery was smooth, no issues. Except that recovery is really a pain in the butt. I've been having more pain than they told me I'd have, the Percocet isn't doing much to help, and the home nurse and PT have been less than helpful.

Last week PT came to the house to help me do my exercises. The first thing he did was take my vitals and everything looked ok. Then we decided I was gonna walk in my hallway for about 5 minutes. I did 2 laps, up many stairs in the process. When we got back to my unit I was very out of breath so he decided he wanted to check my vitals again just to be sure I was ok. My BP was 170/99!

He said that I couldn't do the exercises because it was dangerously high and that made me a high risk for a stroke. So he left. Well, even when the nurse shows up and checks my vitals, after I've been resting, my BP has been around 150/90 for the last month. This Tuesday my BP was 146/90. The nurse informed me that I've got stage 2 hypertension and need to see my doctor for BP meds. So I scheduled to see my doctor on the 9th.

I'm so exhausted all the time and feel so sick. My stomach is always a wreck and I get horrible migraines all the time and meds don't seem to do much good.

I'm hoping on the 9th that we can make heads and tails of this problem and get me on the right meds to help me.

So things keep dog piling on top of me and I can't catch a break. In June I had major spinal surgery. It was a success thank goodness but shortly before the surgery both of my wrists started to hurt pretty bad. When my right wrist bends back it kinda gets stuck and I have to gently bend it back. My doctor wrote an order for a CT scan of both wrists. That was over a month ago. Then we found out we need to do a PA for the procedure. My doctor's office claims they did it. But the facility that's doing the procedure says they never got it. So I called my doctor and told them. Then they said they would do it in a week. Still waiting. So this week I called my doctor again and I was told they knew nothing about it. But the facility claims they faxed my doctor many times about it. I'm so frustrated with the incompetency. Meanwhile my wrists keep getting worse.
2 weeks ago I had a biopsy of a growth on my abdomen. They froze off 15 other growths. The biopsy came back positive for HPV. Unfortunately the dermatologist told me that the strain wasn't tested for so they don't know what it is. The only course of treatment is to freeze off the growths as they pop up.
I found out a few weeks ago that I am being forced to move out of my apartment this year due to a bad infestation of bed bugs in the building. I'm in a housing program that pays my rent partially due to mental health disorders that I have and they've been trying to get the landlords to exterminate the problem but they've been having difficulty doing it for a few years now so they've decided to cut ties with them. I'm having trouble finding a place to move to and I keep getting denied by every place I apply to. It's very stressful and my anxiety is through the roof.
I've had been in PT after my surgery for the last month and yesterday they discharged me from PT due to health concerns. Turns out I've got stage 2 hypertension and my blood pressure has been too high for me to do the exercises. They're afraid of pushing me because I'm a high risk for strokes. I'll be seeing my doctor on Tuesday next week to address the hypertension and they'll probably end up putting me on medication for it.
Shortly before the surgery in June I had blood work done to check my A1C and it was 8.2. now I have type 2 diabetes in my doctor is failing to get me on meds for it. I've been waiting for 2 months for that. I'm really frustrated and angry with my doctor's office for dropping the ball on my care. I deserve better care than this.

I’m wondering how long do you give a new bp med before you call the doctor because you realize it may be causing increased physical pain and symptoms?

I’ve only had a high blood pressure for a couple of years, extremely high. 180-200/104. Before that, I consistently had a bp of about 112/75-80, my whole adult life. Until the pain got unbearable again and mobility was affected so much, still is.

I’ve been on bp meds for about a year now. I take 2 different meds. It took months and months for me to get through to my doctor and make him hear me. Something has not been right in my body and I kept telling him, he’d blow it off.

My neurologist (a hundred miles away) continues to do bloodwork and every single time my potassium is too low, my sodium way to low, etc. The e.r. (heart attack scare), had to pump me full of saline and every blood test is showing the too lows, too highs, etc. She kept telling me to call my doc and tell him bp meds need adjusted, he’d blow it off.

Last week-
Finally, after a heated online message to him, he heard me. I was given an immediate next morning appointment (wow!, first time ever). He changed 1 of the 2 meds. I feel like it too, is making more pain in my legs, more full pressure feeling and more tingling. How long do I need to give this new med a try?