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They saved my life

To some people these are just animals. To me they are my babies, the one love tha never judges just accepts you & the amount of times I owe them my life. When attempts have happened they have helped to make me realise things

The Merle pup I’m proud of has just been accepted into an assistance dog program so I very excited it will cha be my life give me more confidence and ability to go out

I’m so proud of my dogs , every day I try now to make myself worthy of being part of their lives
#Dogs #mybabies #theysavedmylife #MentalHealth #Anxiety #Depression #SuicideAttemptSurvivors #Selfharm #Love #myalways #Fibromyalgia #RaynaudsPhenomenon #dropattacks #badmobility #Diabetes #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Psychosis #SelfharmRecovery #Selfcare #happy #mypack #smile

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Experiencing psychosis in my 30s #Psychosis #PMDD

My wife was recently diagnosed with PMDD, which comes with periods of psychosis. We have been together for 20 years and she is doing very well now that she is on the correct medication. I, however, am struggling. I am trans masc and I have not had surgery (to be blunt, I still possess a uterus). My therapist warned me to watch for symptoms in myself due to that fact. I thought, no way. Not me. But it’s now 5+ months of symptoms right on time. I have been experiencing wildely alarming and uncharacteristic thoughts like clock-work. (Note: I have had periods of this for about a year and a half- right around the time I changed from an SSRI for anxiety to Wellbutrin. The cyclical nature of PMDD makes it very difficult to even connect these periods to any kind of pattern, so we have both been oblivious that I was having symptoms too until she had her diagnosis and was getting treatment.) In the moment, the delusional thinking don’t always sound like a symptom and instead sounds real. My wife typically catches me and points out, “hey, have you seen the date and where I am in my cycle? I start/just started my psych meds.”
This has started to become frightening. I finally met with a new psychologist after my last moved- and it was a bad fit from the start. I felt steam-rolled during the consultation and when I reached out reporting one script he had me on made me feel high and sick because of how much my heart was racing, and the psych symptoms, I was told to just keep taking what he already prescribed and we could talk about the psychosis at our next session in a few months. I terminated our relationship and am now waiting to speak to my therapist next week to be set up with a new psychiatrist.
I’ve never had symptoms like this. I really feel for my wife and how much she struggled with this for so long and she had no name for it or way to explain her behavior. I’m thankful she’s with me every day and so happy that she is finally experiencing relief. This is terrifying. I look forward to getting care in the next few weeks, but for now I’m feeling really shaky on my feet.

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Learning To Love The Unlovable

2018-2019 Janet,

I have a lot to tell you. I’ve been looking at a lot of journals and mood logs that you’ve kept over the years. And there’s a lot on my heart, so I thought I’d write you a letter, to give you my perspective on things. You are going through a lot, and struggling, like everyone does, to understand yourself and your purpose and your path. I want to tell you that this does get easier. But you’ll go through hell to get there. It’s all worth it though.
Something that really stands out to me in these journals is how very hard you are on yourself, how much you expect perfection and how your mood crashes when you can’t achieve it.
I’m here to tell you what I think you already know first, which is that perfectionism is hell— one that you create due to your fear of vulnerability, of love, of acceptance, of failure.
Second, I want to tell you something I don’t think you’ve realized yet, but will someday soon— that perfect will ultimately destroy you, that perfect is unattainable, that perfect will never give you peace or throw you any parties for what you have accomplished in this life. It’s a lie— one you’ve learned, but one you can unlearn. You will never feel satisfied as long as perfectionism is whispering, “it’s not enough” in your ear.
Another thing that stands out to me is your intense preoccupation with, and dissatisfaction with, where you are in life. There’s a lot about you to celebrate. There’s a lot about you to love.
But you are so focused on the future, the what if’s, on where you want to be, on your perceived sense of failure (particularly in relation to your goals as a musician) that you can’t accept yourself or celebrate how far you’ve come because you can’t even see how far you’ve come.
I know things are really up and down for you. I wish I could tell you that this is the worst of it, but the darkest days are only just beginning for us.
In December 2019 you’ll start to spiral and from there your world will rapidly change. You’ll feel it coming, but you won’t know what it is. You’ll never be the same again.
I’m here to tell you it’s all for the better, and that I wouldn’t trade the dark days ahead of you for brighter ones even if I could because we harness our greatest power, show our biggest love, vulnerability and bravery during these times. And it will all show you a light within that you can’t yet begin to imagine.
In 2020 your mind will break, kind of, along with the world. What will already become a very isolating period for many will be a prison for you. You’ve never known a place so dark and painful as this. But it is here in this place you didn’t choose that you find yourself— bright lit with compassion and heartache and resilience. I am cheering you on, I really am.
I know how much it will feel as though you’re drowning. But I’m here to tell you that you can breathe under water, and that as you sink deeper you will find yourself more there. And at the bottom you’ll find grace, hope, brutality and beauty.
2020-2023 will be a mad blur, but you connect the missing pieces somehow.
I see how you struggled to get here to me, now. And I have nothing but love and admiration for you.
After years of hell, just when things start to get better again, they’ll get worse. The past will come to remind you of itself. And you’ll wonder what the point of healing ever was. But in this anger and resentment you’ll learn to love the unlovable. Through all the heartache your heart becomes fuller, filled with forgiveness and softness.
There’s probably a lot I haven’t said here, but we can always talk again. I’m always here to create space for us. I guess I will leave with this—
I am in awe of you, how much you’ve faced, how the world and all its darkness could have hardened you and yet you became somehow ever more tender to the touch, all the more open and sensitive and strong.
I am truly your biggest fan, enamored by you and your courage and your ability to find gratitude in what would break most people’s spirit. I can’t know what’s to come for you, for us. But something tells me whatever darkness lie ahead, whatever lion’s dens are waiting for us, we will come out roaring— not in rage, but in victory, and that we will continue to find beauty and gratitude in the pain. There is beauty on the other side of these years.
Where you are now, at the dawn of these hardships, is not where you will be. And I want you to know more than anything that I am there, too, and that I believe you have everything you need to come out victorious.
When it’s over, I will be here to meet you, to become you, to love you, to embrace you, to lick your wounds, to accept you exactly as you are.

Restlessly Waiting,
2023 Janet

#MentalHealth #BipolarDisorder #Psychosis #MoodDisorders #Anxiety #BipolarDepression

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Where Do We Put The Pain

Tonight I find myself weighed down by them and all they have to say, about everything, about anything I try to do. Even everything I’m not doing.
Mattia is upset. It feels that way at least. I know he’s not really mad at me about getting up to make tea (at 1am). I get that he’s just exhausted, too. And worried. Like me. But it’s all I could think to do to take care of myself.
What I really want to do is go on a drive through the dark streets of this little desert town.
Late night drives remind me of college-mania, what was only my own personal inner-critic then, telling me I really shouldn’t take up space in the world, that maybe after all the sleepless nights, after all the rising and falling, maybe I was finally down for good and would never make it because god was disappointed in me or something . All my efforts to stay alive…
And I did, here I am, but I have the same feelings tonight, about my worth, about my life, about all my mistakes and fuck-ups, about death, about letting my body rise again out of itself, but instead of pulling it back to me, letting it go, like a little girl holding onto the string of a balloon with sticky ice cream fingers, watching myself float away into the atmosphere until I disappear entirely, until the pressure becomes too much for me, until there’s nothing left but little scattered pieces of me, that will fall and never meet each other again. The string I once held so tightly to, that held me to me, gone forever.
I think about ending it all, maybe. A little less now, at this point in my life, in my self-love journey, if you could call it that. Sometimes I wonder how learning to love yourself can be filled with days and nights where you loath your existence so deeply, your bloated body, your broken mind. It’s a violent road, it’s risky.
But maybe it’s what we are all put here to do, learn love, maintain love, share it instead of trying so desperately to hold onto it because we are so lonely and sad and love is all we want to feel.
I’m not quite sure yet where to put the pain of this, what to do with it, but I don’t want to place it on myself anymore. I don’t want to place it on you either. I’m sorry I ever did.
I want you to know, I weep with you, for you, for me, for this illness, for this messed up and chaotic life. I feel with you, the madness, the loneliness that never goes away, that only digs its claws in deeper it seems, day after day.
Can we let go? Can we turn the loneliness into love?
I don’t know.
But I believe in our strength and ability to get through whatever life may mess us up with. I love you. I’m thankful for you because I know we’ll all come out not only alive, but healthy again, someday anyway. It all depends, on where we decide to put the pain.
#Psychosis #BipolarDisorder #MentalHealth #Bipolar1 #Manic #ManicEpisodes #MoodDisorders #Anxiety #Addiction #BipolarDepression #SuicidalIdeation #Grief #Trauma

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I'm new here!

Hi, my name is fluffyantbird4230. I'm here because I happened to come across Mighty Bird twice. I’ve been experiencing psychosis and have been struggling not to become withdrawn again. Many things have happened and I feel as though I’m really ignoring the root issue, then again I’m not sure what it is. I’m fighting the war within. I have therapy, not medicated, prescribed or self. I have art therapy and I go out in nature when I can no longer resist the urge to be amongst the trees and I may cry but I always pray and look at even the smallest insect to distract me from my own pain. I’m here.

#MightyTogether #Anxiety #Depression #BipolarDisorder #Migraine #PTSD #OCD

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i dont know what to do

I am struggling so bad and I don't know what to do anymore. Today my therapist quit on me and my psychiatrist is about to quit on me as well, as neither of them have any solutions or ideas of how to treat me. I was diagnosed with Bipolar 2 a year ago and was making amazing progress until about April, as I went through a highly traumatic event, and have been stuck in an ever-increasing state of derealization/depersonalization. I am convinced that nothing is real, and then inherently nothing has any purpose. I have been stuck in this dissociative state for too long and I genuinely can't handle it much longer. I am on so many meds and none of them have helped at all, but they were helping until April and then I sunk deeper than I ever have before. I don't know if this is a Bipolar mixed state, psychosis, a personality disorder, or just very intense depression. I don't know what to do. The only reason I am functioning is because of my very intense discipline that I've had since I was young, otherwise I would have lost my job and possibly failed out of college. If anyone has any ideas please share, I am desperate for anything at this point. #Depression #Bipolar2 #DerealizationDisorder #DepersonalizationDisorder #DissociationDisorders #PTSD

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I'm new here!

Hi, my name is Jill.
I'm here because 1st off I have the diagnosis
I've done my time in the trenches. Mental Health Units. Psychosis large enough to be written about in the news with Federal Criminal Charges, Forensic Involuntary Treatment Orders. Medication failures and success. Police and Ambulance escorts to the Emergency room waiting to be assessed. Psychiatrists, Psychologists, Case Workers. All types of Recovery Tools, Tasks, Assistance and Plans.
I now work as a NDIS Support Coordinator for a large company specialising in Mental Health and Drug and Alcohol assistance. I previously worked as a Recovery Worker in a Group Day Centre and then as a Support Worker. My resume is filled with lived experience and I'm studying a Diploma in Mental Health.

I want to connect with people, I want to speak out and share my story on a large scale platform to just be there for someone.

For starters that's all they may need.

#MightyTogether #BipolarDisorder #Depression

6 reactions 3 comments

Will I ever stop feeling like a burden? #BipolarDisorder #Depression #MentalHealth #Psychosis

I voluntarily went for a 72 hour psych hold just to be cut loose after less than 24 hours. Called my husband (who was actually a big part of the deciding factor for the social workers I spoke with to approve my release) he complained that he was happy until he learned that I was being released. Also called my mother who criticized the hospital claiming they clearly didn't care to do their job because they wouldn't be releasing me if they had. My mother lives in a different state, doesn't talk to me on a regular basis & really hasn't for the past 5 years (not all her fault but it hurts that she thinks I'm worse than I am, in a lot of ways)..... I know I'm not perfect and I have my set problems. I'm not always the easiest, nicest or even the most receptive to help when I am getting it (as seldom as it is for me to even ask, let alone receive it). It's hard to trust anyone not just because of my disorders but from the unfortunate times when the people who I thought I could count on have let me down, lied to or deceived me. The disorders just enhance the crappy situations to be crappier and feel more catastrophic than they actually are, even knowing the what and the how I still struggle with the why. Thank you to whoever takes the time to read this, I appreciate you.

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Writing a Music Album 💿 #Music #BipolarDisorder

I’m currently attempting to write an album of ten songs all relating to my lifelong companion, Bipolar. I’ve got the song titles done and I’ve written one song and made a start on three others. It’s now a work in process.


1. Self Medication
2. Mania
3. Antipsychotics
4. The Psychiatrist
5. Sorted for SSRI’s
6. Psychosis
7. The Art of Depression
8. Lithium
9. Hibernating Insomniac
10. Bipolar

#MightyTogether #MentalHealth

7 reactions 1 comment