I am taking a sick day today from work with a bit of a head cold and a headache. I’ve been napping on and off and Ophelia’s been napping with me - she’s been stuck to me like glue. Super sweet. She also does this when I’m having a bad depression episode. She’s the best.
#MajorDepressiveDisorder #Depression #Selfcare #sickday
We have a pretty strict policy at work that if you have any symptoms that could possibly be covid related, you can't come in. So, my boss was off most of last week. She got a negative covid test result, and then said that she couldn't come in the next day because she "felt awful."
It just made me think - if I called in sick every day I felt awful with mental health stuff, I would miss half my shifts!
The days when I am so anxious I can barely leave the house
The days when I carry a small stuffed animal in my hand along the 30 minute walk to work to try to soothe myself enough to cope
The days when I have tunnel vision at work because somehow trauma has been triggered
The days when anxiety makes it impossible to concentrate or hold a normal conversation
The days when I'm battling SI on my walk to work
The days after I've stayed up most of the night because turning out the light felt like the most terrifying thing
The days when I'm practicing 4-7 breathing patterns behind my face mask through my whole shift
The regular day in and day out of life with depression, anxiety, and PTSD.
I am feeling a lot of stress in my job right now, but I feel like if I took one day off, it could easily turn into an avalanche and I'd just stop going in to work altogether. I definitely can't afford that, so I just keep going and watch while everyone else around me takes sick days, recovers, and carries on with life. If only all I needed to recover was a day off!
#Job #sickday #Recovery #Healing #MentalHealth #Depression #Anxiety #PTSD
I had a stomach bug yesterday. I thought I was better enough to go to work, but as the day went on, I started feeling weak and lightheaded. I told the boss that I was sick and was going to take the rest of the day off. He said “Well, you look and sound just fine, so you must be doing fine” and then broke into laughter. He said “”just kidding, go home and feel better.” Because of my history, being accused of faking, even as a joke, is extremely triggering and I hate that worse than any symptom of any illness. I literally have suicidal and self harming thoughts after someone says something like that. I don’t think that he was “just kidding.” I think that he resented me taking the sick time and retaliated by tormenting me. Even if he was “just kidding” it was not funny at all and it was a cruel thing to joke about. I’m already anxious every time I have any kind of illness no matter how minor because I’m so afraid of being accused of faking, and people do that everywhere I go and they have for my whole life. #sickday #ObsessiveCompulsiveDisorder #Anxiety #Depression
There was a time when I might take only 2 sick days in a year-- more often than not, I did. Not because I was so healthy, but because I could still push through, even when I wasn't healthy. Pushing through (I told myself) made me strong. Staying home sick as often as I felt sick would be weak. Sick days were for when I was too sick to get out of bed or walk across the room or (my personal gold standard) had a fever of a certain level.
This year, I am working half time, due to my health. I have had to put everything else on hold just to keep working... And yet I find myself taking a sick day again. That makes 8 in the last month and a half... And I only work a 4 day week.
Thing is, my standards didn't change. I just pushed myself through so much that something finally gave out. I can't walk across a small room without feeling sick on my good days now. On the bad days, getting out of bed is a big ask.
I love my job. I've done everything I can to keep working (and that's a topic for another post).
But I'm scared. (It takes a lot to admit that-- I'm not usually on speaking terms with my emotions.)
I don't know how much longer I can keep this up.
#ChronicFatigue #ChronicIllness #exhausted #sickday #MyalgicEncephalomyelitis
I hate how a common bug can bring me down! I’ve always had a poor immune system, but I used to be able to fight through it. Now, I need 15 hours of sleep and to lay in bed the rest of the day. 25 going on 85 here! #EhlersDanlosSyndrome #ChronicIllness #sickday #sickofbeingsick
He’s here and I love him! I had to take a sick day from work and we’re just cuddling. 💙 the tag around his neck says, “anxious is how I feel, not who I am.” He was created by Nanea Hoffman who is also the founder of Sweatpants and Coffee.
Go check it out sweatpantsandcoffee.com/about/the-story-of-sc
Also I must add I feel guilt when I take a sick day. I only do it when I really need it. I felt it more with a previous boss. New boss is cool. But I still kinda feel bad cuz I had to leave early last Friday and of course my brain is like, “well that doesn’t look good, boss probably thinks you just want 3 day weekends..” and so on. The overthinking and over analyzing is awful.🙄 so often I want to turn my brain off, or at least certain parts of it.
I’ll end here. Wishing everyone a great day.🌻
#Depression #Anxiety #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorder #IrritableBowelSyndromeIBS #PTSD #SleepApnea #sickday #sotired #MightyTogether #Anxietyblob #Sweatpantsandcoffee
When you’re having a sick day...but every days a sick day...so you go to work anyways...
I have been suffering a bit, especially over christmas and new years, I took today off as I was feeling really fragile and my boss reckons I am showing a lack of respect for the business, he knows what I suffer with and so I am ashamed to know there are people like this out there especially knowing he is my manager, I have lost so much respect for him. #StopTheStigma
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