Insomnia

I look at my childhood home, & feel warmth in my heart knowing that’s where my grandpa is.
I feel nostalgic, memories of hitting the piñata on my birthdays.
Feel numb to the fact that it wasn’t all perfect.
Now it’s affecting my marriage… isn’t?
Or is it just me?
I don’t give af how that basement looks most times.
But it would be nice to have it feel like home.
For once.

How to make hell, home…

I feel like a stranger at someone’s house
It doesn’t feel real.

Doesn’t feel like I was “happy” in a while
I’m always tired
Always trying to find a distraction
Trying to find reasons to stay.
I hate it here

I’m tired of people congratulating me.
“You like your new place better?”
No, it’s killing me.
It’s a living nightmare.
It’s a scary movie.
And I’m the side character that gets killed,
In the end

I’m tired
I don’t want to do this anymore
As if I had a choice.
I have no say.
Never did.
Probably never will.
Never had control of anything in my life.
From my emotions, thoughts, and feelings, to where I want to live.
I’m so tired.

I can feel myself slipping again

#PTSD #BipolarDisorder #Anxiety #Insomnia #MightyPoets #ChildhoodDisorders

Hello 👋🏼🤗
Welcome to the wonderful world of crazy meets k-pop. I am your group host and I am always ready to chat with you about anything that comes to mind. I know how it feels to experience the deepest side of #Depression #Anxiety #Insomnia #PanicDisorder #BipolarDisorder and how it can impact your life.

Sometimes things just do not feel right and it all feels as if it was falling apart. But the best part of it is knowing that when you're in that suffering moment, there are some things you can do that are like medicine to the heart. It involves a lot of focus, but when you pay close attention to what is going on you can find the reason to keep moving.

Life is tough, but you are too.
Do not ever let anyone tell you otherwise. You might not feel strong, but you are a lot stronger than you think you are. Everything will be OK.

Hang in there and Speak Up!

Love,
Valerie Corinne

It is another evening of Insomnia. I am tired but can't bring myself to get to sleep. My mind is not racing, but my heart is (emotional heart). I have these dreams of mine that I wish would come true. I wish that I were more known so I can help more people.

I thought about #KimNamjoon from #bts and I remembered how horrible it feels to be awake at night and cannot sleep. Sometimes at night is when our emotions are most vulnerable. When the world is quiet around us, and all we have is ourselves, we sometimes fall apart and all the stress of the day comes out. Do not ever be ashamed.

I wish I could legitimately talk to Namjoon from BTS, but it is like my voice is among a sea of screaming fans and I don't scream. I reach out and speak. I would hug him and tell him that everything is going to be alright. Money cannot buy happiness. Happiness is something we create for ourselves.

All my thoughts and prayers.

I pray my wish comes true.

A million voices, but I speak a One.. a woman in the garden as a pink rose among all the yellow.

Love,
Valerie

#Insomnia
#MentalHealth

Health conditions, challenging circumstances, chronic pain, insomnia, unanswered questions, or unexplained symptoms can make each day different, some more difficult to get through than others. As Mighties, we know this all too well. 🙋‍♀️

What are you finding most difficult right now? How are you coping? What's helping you find relief or balance?

#MightyMinute #CheckInWithMe #ChronicPain #ChronicIllness #Disability #RareDisease #MentalHealth #Anxiety #Autism #Parenting #PTSD #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #BipolarDisorder #ObsessiveCompulsiveDisorder #EatingDisorder #Depression #Fibromyalgia #Lupus #MultipleSclerosis #Migraine #Spoonie

My sleep schedule is totally messed up, even more now because it’s summer and I have nothing to get up early for (I am a minor in school still). I’m trying to figure out something that will make me more productive while I have all of this free time because I can’t hang out with my friends every 5 minutes. I was thinking about riding my bike more but there are not a lot of places near me that I want to bike to. Mostly due to the fact that I’m scared of biking anywhere too far because I have zero stamina! Any suggestions? Enjoy this picture of my dog, have a lovely day!

#Insomnia #CheckInWithMe

for all my fellow mighties who have been failed by the medical community who continue to use a one-size-fits-all approach. we will keep fighting together for wellness 😌💪🏼💖 #ChronicIllness #Undiagnosed #MentalHealth #MyalgicEncephalomyelitis #ChronicFatigue #Anxiety #Depression #Disability #ObsessiveCompulsiveDisorder #Insomnia

Some of my fellow mighty friends have recently been posting some cool thing and it inspired me to share one of the pieces of “art” I made recently.

Watercolors are extremely soothing for me. I like the fluidity of them, mixing the colors, watching the pigment spread across wet watercolor paper.

I saw this project on IG by an artist Andrea Nelson and decided to try it. If you want to create it too (it also probably would be fun with kids), here is what I did:

First- you need to find leaves. I used my neighbors - he has better leaves than I do.
I then taped down my watercolor paper with washi tape.
I mixed my colors with enough water for them to be fluid but still highly pigmented (watercolor paintings aren’t usually super vibrant but all of mine are because I like bold color). Personally I prefer tube watercolor paint, but any will work. You will get more pigment if you “pre-wet” your watercolor pans (the dry ones) a minute or two before you use them.
I used clean water to wet my paper and then I painted a layer with a mixture of the colors.
I placed the leaves on the wet paper and then added more paint around the leaves.
I placed “weights” (crystals) on the leaves as the paint dried (it takes longer than you’d expect- especially under the leaves).
After a few hours I removed the crystals and leaves and it turned out this beautiful!

I would love to know what you all think. I may just love it because watercolors are soothing to me.

#ChronicVestibularMigraine #Migraine #ComplexPosttraumaticStressDisorder #Agoraphobia #PanicDisorder #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorder #ADHD #Insomnia #PosturalOrthostaticTachycardiaSyndrome #CarpalTunnelSyndrome #MentalHealth

I'm in the middle of moving house, which has increased my anxiety and stress ten fold. Unfortunately, this has really affected my sleeping patterns and I'm completely turned around.

I find that I have hallucinations and panic attacks at night, that just sit with me and when I close my eyes, all I see is a horror show of flashbacks. I don't tend to have this issue during the day but need to be awake to deal with Solicitors, removal companies, utility companies, Broadband companies etc.

This is leaving me with a maximum of two hours to three hours sleep (normally after eating my evening meal, whilst it's still light). As soon as it get's dark, I'm awake for the rest of the evening.

I've tried meditation, relaxing music, reading, medication and nothing is breaking the cycle.

Does anyone have any sage advice for me or ideas on what I can try next? I'm absolutely exhausted!

#Insomnia #PTSD #Anxiety

Something on this platform has been bothering me lately.

People reach out because they’re suffering, but they feel ashamed of being perceived as negative and dragging others down. They apologize for “venting” or “ranting”.

I’ve turned to this community for help when I’m struggling, and I’m sure I’ll do it again in the future. I’ve been met with incredible empathy and love.

Journaling doesn’t work for me. It reinforces my pain. Reaching out does wonders.

This is a safe space. A place for affirmations, humor, knowledge, creativity, and gratitude. But also a place to lay bare a dark night of the soul.

I read an article about the benefits of expressing negative emotions by Malinda King, MA, LPCC. Some quotes:

“We cannot selectively numb or deny emotions so when we do that to our sadness, fear, and anger, we are also numbing out our ability to experience happiness, joy, and gratitude.”

“Blocked and suppressed emotions have been linked to physical problems like heart disease, intestinal problems, headaches, insomnia, and autoimmune disorders.”

“When we express vulnerable emotions like sadness, pain or fear with other people we care about, it actually creates bonding moments with that other person, making the relationship deeper, more meaningful, and intimate.”

So no, we don’t have to “accentuate the positive” at the expense of being authentic. (That doesn’t mean we have to abandon gratitude or finding “glimmers”- those are part of the picture, too).

I am so grateful that, when needed, I can “vent” and “rant” here. And I hope that new Mighties feel safe and supported when they do the same.

#Bipolar #Depression #GAD #OCD #PTSD