ROCD

I love having someone who understands my brain, but it's so hard sometimes too. I am on hour 5 of resisting compulsively texting her, after receiving a barrage of compulsive texts from her and two compulsive calls. She knew what was happening and was trying really hard to resist, and I think she was eventually successful. But I am still having wave after wave of what-ifs about her safety. Logically I know she's probably asleep, but of course that does nothing for the doubts. For hour one I just handwrote a journal entry to her, and I thought that did it, but the compulsion keeps coming back. I wonder if I should just throw myself fully into an exposure session and try to speed up the process of no longer feeling like trash, but it's so late and I should have been asleep an hour ago (dr appointment, office hours, and lab meeting tomorrow, good lord), so maybe I should just rawdog it until I fall asleep. When the thoughts are so bad that I keep involuntarily hyperventilating for short periods, I don't know if an exposure would help or hurt.

I have however come up with a fun strategy: pretending that her compulsive texts are actually attempts to type out whale vocalizations. It removes the focus from the content of the messages and makes it easier for me to resist reassuring her and instead do/say things that are actually helpful (which is sometimes doing nothing). It's hard when it's relationship OCD-related, like today, because I automatically want to take it seriously and personally, but the silliness of imagining that all those texts are just like OOOOOoooaaauauuuuUu whale noises does kind of help.

#ObsessiveCompulsiveDisorder #ERP #ROCD #copingstrategies #Sleep #HarmOCD #Relationships #Autism #CheckInWithMe

He just doesn't get it. Relationship ocd is confusing. My mind constantly comes up with doubts of our relationship. Then he gets upset, I become angry, then I overcorrect. Fine, I just won't care at all then. Maybe all this isn't worth the hassle. I've broken up with him over 15 times in the last 3 years. He knows its a cycle but he just doesn't understand how my brain tortures me. Sometimes for hours, interrupting my work and life. He also deserves better than this.

#RelationshipOCD #OCD #ROCD

Knowledge will help you heal. Before you dive into recovery know that OCD can show up as :

1. INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS or IMAGES :
Such thoughts & images can be sudden or be a result of fear of a situation that you know triggers you. These can be better understood as associations that your brain makes that don't necessarily go hand in hand with your morals or beliefs or desires, which makes them all the more disturbing. They pop up in the head and halt your activities. These are often of sexual or violent nature or can be religious or contamination based. Ignore it like you ignore garbage on road.

2. INTRUSIVE EMOTIONS or FEELINGS :
When a feeling of distressing nature arises we most often tend to take it as a proof that whatever our brain is telling us is true but we have to keep in mind that OCD can cause false feelings such as false arousals or false attractions. Don't fall for this and just keep disregarding all that ocd comes up with, to keep you in the loop. It will feel very real and strong but upsetting because that's not something you want in actuality. It's like a bad manipulative friend putting bad ideas in your head with which you do not agree but these ideas seem very doable in theory. In practicality it's not so.

3. INTRUSIVE URGES:
You may suddenly feel an urge to do something that's extremely distressing for you or goes against your values and morals. All of this is because of your OCD and these are not your own urges. It can even feel like a sudden burst of energy or ultimate surety that you can do whatever the urge is but that's not true. OCD is making you believe it's something you want to do when what you actually want is the exact opposite, but you may not see it just yet since you are not in the right frame of mind.

4. INTRUSIVE INVOLUNTARILY MOVEMENTS:
These can be sudden movement of the hands, legs, head, hip, lips, eyes, tongue, groin and any other part that you can think of. When OCD manifests itself physically then it becomes very tricky to deal with since we just can't help but notice it and take it as a proof of whatever theme we are dealing with. This one really can make us question if what we are dealing with is OCD or are we just in denial. Let me tell you, all of these little involuntary movements that at the time seem voluntary, is infact a part of OCD and isn't proof of anything other than the fact that you have OCD. Groinal movements include getting wet, feeling a tingling sensation, erection etc. Movements of the mouth may be pouting of the lips or salivation. It can be blinking for the eyes. Head shaking is also a thing. Hands, legs and hips can move in any direction depending on the individual and the theme of OCD.

5. INTRUSIVE DREAMS:
As if it wasn't enough for OCD to torment us when we are awake, it also invades our sleep. In such dreams we find ourselves enjoying the act. Don't take it as an indication of something. If we dreamt of flying, would that make us grow wings and give us the ability to fly?

Just a little food for thought for this morning:

Does anyone else’s family make their ROCD worse by saying rude and inappropriate comments about their significant other? It’s actually frustrating especially knowing they know what you’re suffering from... #ROCD #OCD

Anybody else have really bad ROCD? I feel like I’m alone and I’d love to compare stories with someone 😊 #ROCD #OCD #MentalHealth

I've been diagnosed with OCD for a while now. I've always had certain sounds that really bothered me, as well as certain words. Today I still often experience extreme discomfort when I hear a "trigger" sound, and it causes a lot of my OCD intrusive thoughts to happen. I'm beginning to wonder if I may have misophonia. I don't want to self diagnosis, but I'm curious to know if anyone else has OCD and misophonia, and some coping tips to deal with it. I've been having a really hard time the last few days with this, and any advice or solidarity would be really appreciated :) #OCD #Misophonia #ROCD #RelationshipOCD #Anxiety #PureO

I’ve never been one to admit what could be inside of me this whole time but after researching and some self actualization I am realizing that it is okay to admit my faults if I want to make them better, i have been on this app for a day and i can say that i have rocd but it may be too late for me and my boyfriend, he decided he needed a break and we are not on speaking terms right now. I am taking this time to do what i need for myself and the first step for me is to get in touch with my old self the person i was when he fell in love because that person is strong, fierce, unstoppable, and worth it.