emotionallyunstablepersonalitydisorder

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Limiting Beliefs and Holding on to Grief #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #emotionallyunstablepersonalitydisorder

I developed BPD because my parents were intentionally trying to hurt me is a limiting belief that I have which is hold me back and causing me suffering.

I am learning to let go of the rage, anger and hate that I have towards my parents because it is making suffer more than it is causing them any pain.

I don’t see them as my parents anymore because to me they were never my parents and that’s okay. Not in an abondonment sense just that they aren’t my parents, period.

They were just the people who raised me. I can now be a parent for myself. I have the rest of my life to teach myself that I am loveable, I am enough, I am smart, I am worthy, I am beautiful, and I am valid.

No matter how much I try to make the people who raised me understand that the beatings, the yelling, the scaring, the guilting, the screaming, the threatening, the ignoring, the emotionally neglect and the shaming is not the right way to be parents. They do not validate me or apologize. The people that raised me say, “We never did that and we tried our best to raise you. That’s how are parents raised us. We gave you shelter. We did nothing wrong”.
When I hear them say this I feel hopeless. It makes me feel rage, anger, and hate but holding onto these emotions only hurts me and makes me feel grief.

I think I feel hopeless and rage because I’m still looking for parents in people who to this day are unable to give me what I need. They are unable to love me in a kind way. The way that I want. I will learn to parent and love myself.

I know now it’s okay to feel emotions.

I remind my emotions as they come up (even the negative emotions) that I love them and that I can hear them. I am here for them.

I have radically accepted that the people that raised me just don’t have to ability to understand that how they treated me continuous to make me suffer today at twenty-six years old.

All I know is that I am here for myself now. I won’t give up on myself. I will give myself a good life.

I am beautiful, I am worthy, I am smart, I am loveable, I am enough and I am valid.

Thank you ✨,

🧸
#BPDDiagnosis

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Overreacting

So today I had this incident where I did something wrong and my manger like corrected my mistake and kinda reprimanded me firmly but not harsh.
Like just point out my flaws.
Which is normal right? Like no one would learn your mistake if ppl where nice to you all the time. I’m aware of that.
But I got so angry with her and I started to cry and whail.
Then 10min later I wasn’t angry with her anymore because I acknowledge my fault but then I got angry with myself for reacting this way. Then when I thought that each time someone points out my flaw I have to react this way, and repeat the cycle cause it hurts like crazy mad, I started to want to hurt myself and then suicide. Like I went to that extent.
I hate myself for this.
Anyone else can help me and tell me if you have had similar experience.
Thanks. #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #EmotionalIntensity #EUPD #emotionallyunstablepersonalitydisorder #anger

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Feeling of #Sadness and #worry .

YOU KNOW THAT FEELING YOU GET ALL OVER YOUR BODY WHEN YOU FIND OUT SOME BAD NEWS. THAT IS THE FELLING I FEEL ALL DAY. EVERY DAY.

#emotionallyunstablepersonalitydisorder

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Don’t know what to do

I was diagnosed back in February and my symptoms have only worsened since then. I don’t know where to turn to for help, I’m still waiting for the Personality disorder team to get in touch with me. The hardest emotion I have issues dealing with right now is unexplained anger from nowhere. Does anyone else with Borderline Personality experience the same? #emotionallyunstablepersonalitydisorder #PTSD

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Completely Embarrassed

My dog tore his pad open today when he was in the river, and I called the vet and she said to bring him in if the bleeding didn't stop and I couldn't get a dressing on. I really struggled to get the dressing on so I called her back to ask if there was anyway for a home visit as I don't have anyway to get there as I don't know anyone to drive me (the nearest vets is 15 miles away due to covid) and her response was "how can you live somewhere and not know anyone that drives? That's ridiculous" (she, no joke, laughed as she said ridiculous). I honestly had to hang up the phone in tears because I was too embarrassed to say it's because I don't have any friends, I really didn't need to be reminded how ridiculous that is to everyone else.

Also I got the bleeding stopped but I can't get a bandage on still so I've ordered some antiseptics online and a E-cone collar to see if I can fix it myself, just in case any one read this and was worried about my pupper.

#BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #BPD #EUPD #emotionallyunstablepersonalitydisorder #personalitydisorder #clusterbpersonalitydisorders #lonely #Nofriends #isolated #dog

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Journey to recovery #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder

Just over 4 years ago I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder, also know as Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder. I did 2 years of Dialectical Behavioural Therapy (DBT) and finished that nearly 2 years ago. Earlier this week I met with my therapist that I worked with as we are co-producing and delivering training on BPD/EUPD to staff, professionals, carers, families, service users and anyone else interested in learning more about the diagnosis. I never thought recovery was possible and never in a million years did I think I would be delivering training to others about personality disorders using my own story and lived experience to contribute to that and hopefully give some hope, too. It’s also really nice to be able to work with my old therapist again but in a new working relationship...one that is of equal value. If you feel this diagnosis is a life sentence, I would have agreed with you but there is hope and there is recovery but there is also opportunity. If my story can help just one person then that means the world and if it helps carers or professionals change the way they treat/help others with the diagnosis then that means even more. I’m not going to make it all sound hunky-dory; there are still times when I really struggle with my mental health but I am better equipped to be able to deal with and manage it. Just hang on in there... #BPDDiagnosis #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #emotionallyunstablepersonalitydisorder #Depression #Anxiety #Recovery #DialecticalBehaviorTherapy

11 comments
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What’s the difference between BPD and EUPD?

I was wondering if someone could tell me the difference between the 2? I just diagnosed with EUPD but my old therapist said it was signs of BPD, so can someone tell me the difference please :) #emotionallyunstablepersonalitydisorder #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder

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Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder + Anxiety + change

So, I've just took a huge step & moved back to my home town after being away for nearly 6 years & surprise surprise, it's hit me like a ton of bricks, my head is all over the place & my anxiety is sky high. I'm hoping once I'm settled it all calms down but right now I feel like I want to lock myself away & impulse spend & eat loads & loads of chocolate.
Is this because of the change? #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #MajorDepressiveDisorder #GeneralisedAnxietyDisorder #emotionallyunstablepersonalitydisorder

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