There’s a chapter in my book detailing my love affair with cigarettes (yes, that’s a shameless book plug but trust I have a point) and if I’m being honest, it is a battle that comes up quite often.
And it comes up most often in times of stress and if there is one thing I have been experiencing in the recent present…it’s stress.
I mean- but aren’t we all.
Anyway.
Raising kids is hard and I think raising teens might be harder. Navigating this world that gives us access to all the things presents its own unique challenges and throw in the fact that we are technology-parent-pioneers…
…well let’s just say mistakes are made and tears are shed.
My go to for a quick stress release has always been cigarettes and I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t effective so trust when I say no judgement, smokers.
However, in my experience, relief in the short term doesn’t always provide relief in the long term.
There’s-like-research and stuff that says smoking causes all kinds of problems like lung disease and cancers and just a host of things that if I had a choice- I wouldn’t choose and I guess the truth is I do have a choice.
Not to mention, those teens I’m raising, they’re watching.
They’re noticing.
They are taking stock at how their mother handles stress and if she chooses unhealthy coping mechanisms well then it kind of passively permits them to do the same.
Short story long- a few months ago I picked cigarettes back up because the stress of it all begged for release and when my kids started questioning why there was a smell of smoke (because you can’t hide that stench no matter the effort) I decided that they deserved a better role model and that prompted me to want to make a different choice.
My feed has been full of other accounts sharing the magic of running and the way it can help the mind and let me tell you that I am open to a lot of things but running has always been an “are you insane” proposition but per usual the influencers were effective at influencing.
I decided to start running. Well, if we’re being honest, it is more of a slow jog.
But now I’m signed up for my first 5K and I have been reconnecting with a friend who runs who also happens to offer beautiful support in the hard and my kids have been joining me on occasion and I *think* the long term benefits of running are just better than the consequences of smoking.
Ok. I know they are.
Anyway. I am sharing this to tell you how easy it is to choose a quick release.
A bad habit.
An unhealthy coping mechanism.
It’s easy because instant gratification.
But y’all, we’ll pay for that quick release in the long run (oh would ya look at that pun) Yes, it is harder to choose movement over cigarettes but it does feel better.
I am finding joy in something that never would I ever have thought could be joyful and I just want to tell you that the draw to substances (like nicotine) is powerful but so are we.
It is all hard friends. But- even if it doesn’t feel like it- we get to choose our hard.
Keep going. I promise you’ll be glad you did.
#MentalHealth #Recovery
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