I feel in deep shame, most times after my husband and I had sex.
I'm afraid to talk about it.
One thing I hate about Wisconsin is snow. But it brings back lots of good memories of me playing in it or playing with my son when he was little. My walks I used to do is now limited due to snow and cold weather. So, I will go to the mall or the ymca and walk. If I can’t I will curl up with my warm blanket and drink my coffee ☕️ or hot chocolate. I will be practicing lots of self care. This is around this time 3 yrs ago I had a mental health crisis. It went on throughout oct-feb. i refuse to have another one. #MajorDepressiveDisorder #PTSD #SexualAbuseSurvivor #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorder
I put this on my bathroom wall. It reminds me that I’m safe now in my apartment. I live alone. He can’t get in and hurt me anymore. Baby steps #iamsafe #Safety #MentalHealth #Depression #Anxiety #CPTSD #PTSD #PTSDawareness #SexualAbuse #SexualAbuseSurvivor #Csa #Dissociation #MentalIllnessStigma #thisishowicope #copingskills #ChildhoodSexualAbuse
Why is it so hard for some people to respect your boundaries? I was writing in my journal tonight and I had wrote that boundaries are very important for everyone’s own mental well-being, but especially for a sexual abuse survivor. The violations of my boundaries were constant, and some were more obvious than others. Other times the violations were more covert rather than overt. I am dealing with a family member who will be visiting next week, who continually violates my boundaries, requests for her not to do certain things and I am just done with it. She doesn’t know I am a sexual abuse survivor, but I think I need to speak my truth. That her continually violating my boundaries makes me not trust her, not feel safe, not feel heard, not want to be around her and definitely not leave my kids alone with her. I struggle with wanting to be liked because I think I will somehow be safer that way, but then when I look in the mirror I don’t like myself because I am not speaking my truth, I am not honoring myself. How do I speak my truth to her? Does anyone else have the same issue with people continually not respecting boundaries?
As a #SexualAbuseSurvivor I’ve dealt with confusion regarding my sexuality. For a long time I thought I was bisexual, but the more I ruminate over it, the more I think I’m straight. Has any other sexual abuse survivor dealt with this? How do you figure out your sexuality? I was abused my a male, so I don’t understand why I flip back and forth between bisexual and straight. Any response is appreciated. #Questioning sexuality dealing with it #SexualAbuse #Confusion
As a #SexualAbuseSurvivor I find myself being attracted to and repulsed by anything sexual at the same time. I’ve had to learn what sex really is versus what it isn’t. It’s a mixture of confusing and conflicting emotions. I crave intimacy but I feel disgusted by it at the same time. I’ve gotten a lot better with being touched but I still find myself freezing up during sex or anything sexual.
I still have flashbacks when he touches me a certain way and that makes me feel bad. My #PTSD gets in the way of enjoying sex. I can’t say I’m ready to have sex the way my boyfriend wants it but I try to be proud of myself for the little things. I try to initiate the encounter but I still lock up. Sexually charged songs, videos or anything of a strong sexual nature makes me repulsed yet I am drawn to them.
I can relate to them to an extent. I struggle with self esteem and how I see my body. Especially the sexual parts. Does anyone else experience this? What have you done to cope? #SexualAbuse #SexualTrauma
One of my favorite things to do for my #MentalHealth is to collect Precious Moments figurines. The smiles on the figurines’ faces always bring me joy and they are beautiful to look at. What are some items that you collect? #Anxiety #Depression #PTSD #Hydrocephalus #SexualAssaultSurvivor #Suicide #SexualAbuseSurvivor #CheckInWithMe