sexual trauma

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sexual trauma
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    I HAD a friend #BipolarDisorder #PTSD #SexualTrauma

    I had a friend. A very good friend I thought who I met on here. I was open with her and would share everything.

    I guess everything was too much. My friend just dropped me. She said I needed help, she said that I was too unstable though I thought I was doing well. She said many hurtful things and now I feel myself really spiraling. If the one person you thought could understand you decided you’re too much to deal with then what does that say about you?
    What does that say about your life? Your family? Your husband and children?

    I went through a traumatic experience recently and then this added to it… I don’t know how much more I can take. The voices in my head (not lieteral) tend to make me feel like a failure and feel like everyone else is better off without me. How much more do I feel that way now?

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    Honesty #PTSD #EmotionalAbuse #DomesticAbuse #SexualTrauma

    I just remembered something and I wanted to share it with you all. When I was at a Rehab facility for 15 months I had group therapy for domestic violence and drug abuse. I also went to individual therapy as well as sexual assault therapy ( which went at my pace). My first time at individual therapy and sexual assault therapy I just kinda sat there trying to make words form that would let my therapist know how I needed help. I than told my S A therapist that I have difficulty speaking what's on my mind because of years of being told that what I had to say didn't matter. But, I can be very talkative when I write what I want to say down on paper. I would put it under my SA therapist door when I was finished so she can read it before our next appointment and she can ask questions. When I got in her office the next time she was all smiles. Because I had wrote about one instance that I've had flashbacks about. She was surprised I was very explicit with details and revealed what I felt afterwards. I told her that if I can't be honest and open about what's messing up my head, then you don't know how to help me. I was told by different case managers, instructors and staff that I was brutally honest and they thought that it did help me along my healing journey.

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    How do you respond to traumatic situations most often?

    There are, most commonly, four different responses a person can have when faced with trauma: fight, flight, freeze, and a less-talked about response called fawning. I’m curious, which one is your knee-jerk reaction most of the time? (Fawning is definitely my go-to response! It’s something I want to actively work on, though.)

    Here’s a bit more about what each response can look like. Which resonates with you?

    🥊 fight — explosive types of outbursts, self-preservation at all costs

    🦅 flight — becoming chronically busy, obsessive thinking or behavior, rushing

    🥶 freeze — most often experienced as disassociation, finding comfort in solitude/isolation

    ⚠️ fawn — a form of people-pleasing, often become codependent, unable to say how you think/feel, avoid conflict

    #CheckInWithMe #PTSD #SexualTrauma #Trauma #Childhoodtrauma #MentalHealth #Anxiety #Depression #ComplexPosttraumaticStressDisorder #Suicide #Selfharm

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