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You Have the Power to Inspire & Change the Lives of Others

TODAY I contacted our leader @nygovcuomo to ensure this is dealt with properly and stops happening, not just in NY, but across the country.

Today I Chose:
To Have Courage To Be Vulnerable And Authentic.
To Confidently Lead And Advocate For Not Just Myself But For Lives Of Others.
To Gracefully Use My Voice For Good.

I may look healthy to you but I am in the current “High Risk” population. Among several other diagnosis, I have Lupus. I’m one of many individuals that rely on the drug Plaquenil (Hydroxychloroquine) as part of my treatment to keep my disease under control. Currently this drug is being used as part of a promising treatment for COVID-19.

I agreed without hesitation to take less than a month’s supply, knowing there is a shortage at pharmacies across the country. I will try to take only half the dosage my treatment calls for in order to extend my supply and give someone else with COVID-19 a fighting chance to survive.

I will NOT tolerate the negligence of doctors around the country hoarding and unnecessarily prescribing this drug “just in case” to people they should not. This drug is still in the trial phases. It should only be prescribed for those who have tested positive for COVID-19 and need this treatment to survive. I’m thrilled there are now treatment options but there has to be a standard protocol set in place for who can prescribe this medication and when. This medication is already depleted from most pharmacies across the nation!

If we are in this together, then let’s start making choices that act accordingly. Stay Home Be Safe Wash your Hands & Keep Social Distancing. It will also save lives!

#MightyMoment #inthistogether #lupusawareness #courageoverfear #makegoodchoices #LupusWarrior #patientadvocate #doinggoodtogether #yourvoicematters #covid_19 #AutoimmuneDisease

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Thirteen counting

I wrote this statement for myself. I needed to hear this. See this. I wrote this because I was in the emergency room end of july this year for self harming/suicide attempt. I got 21 stitches on my leg that day. I've self harmed in the past and have many scars from my mental illness. I've been battling for thirteen years and counting. I've attempted suicide three times. After this last time. I went to see a psychiatrist shortly after. I'm currently on medication and doing better and learning to take care of myself and how important self care really is during stressful, scary, difficult situations. There is more to my story but I will share my poetry and writing. In the process of writing and photographing I hope to create a book of my journey and my future journeys.
Remember your voice matters. Keep fighting. You matter. You are not alone. Let's fight this darkness together.

#MightyPoets #Depression #MentalHealthAwareness #MentalHealth #Writing #mystory #Anxiety #originalpoem #yourvoicematters #shareyourstory #Scars

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Make a decision? #Stupiddumbbreastcancer #MentalHealthAwareness #Blindness #yourvoicematters

How are we supposed to make these decisions? I’m part way through my second type of chemo. I’ve completed 8/12. The taxol started making my fingers go numb. I’m legally blind. I need my fingers for everything from finding the tactile markings on my appliances to cleaning up broken glass and washing dishes, to reading the Braille in elevators to get around. We cut the last dose by 20%, used ice packs on my fingers to limit blood flow/drug exposure, and I’ve started taking B6 to help the nerves. By Monday I have to decided whether to risk another dose or stop here and try to preserve what function I have left in my fingers. And yet, it’s cancer, not a damned cold. No good answer. No guarantees. No way to know. It’s all crazymaking!

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Boob job? Yeah NO

Please let me clarify that  saying “Oh you are so lucky to get a free boob job” or “Oh boy a free tummy tuck” or “Aren’t you happy to have free perky boobs?” should never be said, ever! Add the neuropathy, lymphedema, nerve damage, weight gain, fear of death and all the other crap that we get on top of the CANCER and it is not free, the price we pay is beyond what anyone can afford.   #Stupiddumbbreastcancer #MentalHealthAwareness #yourvoicematters #BreastCancer

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This is me

This is me. Grey hair, wrinkles, weight at an all time high, bags under my eyes. Cancer and MS aged me, stole my confidence and self esteem, what an asshole?! Truth is we are all beautiful, cliche as it is. You don’t need a filter or a mask when you are your authentic self. Who’s digging deep with me? #Stupiddumbbreastcancer #MentalHealthAwareness #yourvoicematters #mentalhealthtools #everybodyisbeautiful #NoFilter

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Safety plan

Having thoughts of Suicide is something many struggle with. Having a plan in place is vital. What’s your safety net look like? Keep it on your phone and review it. Share with those you need. ##Stupiddumbbreastcancer #MentalHealthAwareness #yourvoicematters #CheckInWithMe

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And she said “It hit me that being strong or confident didn’t always mean being loud and having all the attention. Sometimes, it could be that quiet confidence where you just believed in yourself and the beauty of being who you are.” #Stupiddumbbreastcancer #MentalHealthAwareness #yourvoicematters #everybodysbeautiful

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Let’s talk

Spending some time with my bff and his Herbie to talk about Suicide Prevention. The best way to prevent suicide is to talk about your stories. It de-stigmatizes it and connects us. I share mine so others know they aren’t alone. #Stupiddumbbreastcancer #namisyracuse #MentalHealthAwareness #yourvoicematters #lovebugtrumpshate

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Life’s too short for boring socks

Life is too short for boring socks. It’s too short to not live in the moment. It’s too short to not surround yourself by people that lift you up. Life’s too short to not sing ..badly. It’s too short to not realize how lucky you are to have the best of friends in your life you consider family. #yourvoicematters #MentalHealthAwareness #Stupiddumbbreastcancer

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You don’t get over it

I hate when people say "you will get over this", that is a load of crap no matter if it is cancer or death or heart break. If it is real, caused you pain and you suffered then getting over it is something will never happen. I for one never got over my mother's death or any of my friend's passing what I did was I got through it. My girlfriend's son died last year and that was the first thing I said to her "you will get through this" never over. How can you get over something that changed your life 180 degrees?
So saying "get over it" is dumb. You get over a fence or a stream but trauma oh hell no. When you have deep scars, death of friends, side effects, insomnia, weight gain, muscle loss, physical pain, hair loss, hair growth in friggin bad places, toe nails falling off, mishappen boobs, can you get over? #Stupiddumbbreastcancer #MentalHealthAwareness #yourvoicematters

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