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° " So I'm Starting To Question The Food Service Job's... To Me My Experience So Far... Has Been For 2 Year's Stressful...Unsafe...Exhausting...I Don't Know Why People View Me As The Person To Thier Every Issue... That They Just Cannot Care Enough To Fix It Themselve's... I Have Been Giving My Disabled Body... To This Restaurant Day And Night And Overtime Hour's... And I Still Get Yelled At Just Because I'm Not Glued To My Phone.. To Say That I'm On My Way... This Lady That I Work For Doesn't Know How To Be A Good General Manager... Every Other Employee That She Favorite's... Never Get Written Up Or Threated To Get Fired Just Me... I'm Sorry But I'm Done Being Kind And People Pleasing Type... It's K****G My Self Esteem And Energy... She Get's Mad Over The Littlest Issue's... And Never Solves The Bigger One's... I Feel Extremely Taken Advantage Of... And My Kindness Has Been Over Stepped... And My Boundarie's Over Run... We Have Alot Of People On The Night Shift... And Now She's Struggling For The Morning Shift... And Expect's Me To Drop Whatever I'm Doing To Come Help... I Don't Feel Appreciated At This Job At All... They Have Me Mentoring New Employee's... It's Not My Job... Nor In My Job App... On Monday When I Return I'm Going To Have To Hear Them All Whine... As To Why I Never Answer My Phone... I Don't Like It When People Just Put All Thier Energy Into One Basket... And Expect Me To Be A Solution To Thier Need's... I'm A Human Being I Wish To Have A Private Life... That Doesn't Envole Work... Im Like Stuck In A Never Ending Cycle..." ° Sincerely, ☆ S.K. ☆ #Depression

○ " So Today The Morning Was OK Until At 12pm... We Have An Older Lady Assistant Manager She Came In An 1 Late... The Other Assistant Manager Needed To Go To His Other Job... So I Had To Handle Thing's For A Bit.. Mind U I Don't Know Anything About Managing A Store... And Then This Older Lady Never Has Enough Employee's... So I Took Over Doing Front Cashier And Fixing Order's For Both My Side And Lazy Drive-Thru... The Girl That Run's Drive... Never Help's Out And Just Stand's Around... Whining To Go Home Already... And We Got Slammed With Alot Of Order's... The Night Shift Crew Didn't Start Clocking In Until 2pm... It Was Annoying... But Co-worker's Sux... " ○ Sincerely, ¤ S. K. ¤ #Thought #frustration

Hi all,

I am starting to take better care of myself one step at a time which I am proud of but I have constant physical symptoms of anxiety and feeling angry and like crying but I am not sure how to release these emotions, get to the root of them or to manage them more effectively. #Anxiety #Depression #feelingangry #frustration #Heartbroken #numb

"If you would just exercise more, you wouldn't feel so tired". Are you freaking kidding me?! Remember when you had COVID and could barely walk to the bathroom and back to your bed without wanting to collapse into a puddle? THAT is how I feel after 2 minutes of exercise! Argh!!! #frustration #AutonomicDysfunction #HypermobilitySyndrome #cancersurvivor

You ever have a an hour, day, week, month or even year when things just got to be too much? Like you're on emotional overload then it results in either shutting down or lashing out? That's how things have been for me lately. These past few weeks have just worn me out both mentally and physically. Working full time, managing my mental health and maintaining a healthy relationship have become somewhat of a challenge. It seems like the littlest things set me off to either shut down and want to be alone or for my emotions to explode (not just anger but sadness too). I'll cry uncontrollably for apparently no reason, I'll become irritated and touchy. I'll shut down and not respond. When I do respond, it's with intensity.

I do have a history of trauma, so maybe my emotions are telling me that I have more processing to do. Or maybe I'm just under too much stress. I haven't been sleeping well (have been getting up super early) then staying up all day. Today I tried to rest but my thoughts are racing and all I feel like doing is screaming into a void. Since I can't do that I have to find another outlet. I have been reading about stress reduction techniques but haven't found anything that works. Perhaps all this stress and being on an emotional rollercoaster (#BipolarDisorder ) is finally taking a toll on me. I feel like there is no period of stability in between mood episodes (yes I told my psychiatrist and he put me on a new medication).

Maybe all these rapidly changing episodes combined with the trauma is causing more problems than it is solving. Right now I just need encouragement and support. Normally I try to support and encourage others but tonight I need the support, prayers and encouragement. I'm tired in general, but especially tired of the emotional rollercoaster. #PTSD doesn't help either because the intrusive memories can trigger me to be more emotional and #BPD makes regulating those emotions even harder.

I don't want to give up but I feel like I am going backwards and relapsing with some of my symptoms. Which I guess is normal with stress. I want to work, and have a great relationship but that seems hard right now. I'm just really struggling and again I would greatly appreciate the prayers, support and encouragement. Stay safe and reach out for help as always.

Blessings to you all,

-Anastasia

#SexualAbuse #EmotionalAbuse #Childhoodtrauma #stressed #needhelp #PTSD #BipolarDisorder #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #frustration

Going back to my ENT this week because the hole in my left eardrum hasn’t healed up and it keeps bothering me. My right ear has been bothering me ever since my last ear infection last year. I had to get tubes when I was younger, so I don’t know if it’s time to get them again, but I know I’m definitely going to have to get the hole in the other ear patched up because the last time we did a hearing test I was losing hearing in that ear, but know I’m having problems with my right ear. #earproblems #eartubes #ent #earinfections #HearingLoss #frustration #ChronicInfections

♡ " I'm Just Going To Light Some Candle's And Make An Offering... And Also Get Some Much Desperately Needed Sleep And Rest... Also Enjoy My Next Day Off.. Before I Go Back To Work On Friday. I Really Don't Know How To Get Rid Of Negative Feeling's.. I'm An Empath So It's A Struggle For Me Not To Feel Or Pick Up On Anyone's... Emotion's Especially At Work Were I Deal With Alot Of People... And Thier Issue's... I Feel Like I'm Going Insane... And Feeling Useless And Worthless.. My Thing Is Helping Where It's Needed. But Nope I'm Restricted To Only Register And Cleaning... Which To Me It's Not Being.. Productive In Anyway. #frustration #Depression ☆•☆ SKAOI KVITRAVN☆•☆

I don't get what I do ...one min. Me and my mother in law are chatting and laughing then BAM next thing I know she's pissed off and rude ...not sure if at me or something else...I'm so confused ugh!! #Whiplash #confusing #FamilyMember #frustration

♤ " So I Don't Get Why People Alway's Think That I'm A Very Mean Person... And A B***h Which... I'm Not Maybe Get To Know Me Better... Before You All Start.. Assuming Thing's Without Bothering To Take The Decent Time To Know Who I'am 1st... I'm A Nice Person... I'm Very Shy... But Not Very Talkative.. Unless I Know You Very Well.. Then I Will Start To Open Up... I Reserve My Anger For People Who Wish To Hurt Me Or Dismiss Me... But I'm A Good Friend... And A Listener... And An INTROVERT... If People Keep Assuming This About Me... Well Oh Well Good Luck Knowing You... I'm Not Going To Waste My Time Being Liked.. And There Are True People Who Actaully Care And Like Me... So That's All I Care About.. Take Care " ♤ #Thought 's ¡ SKADI !