Good morning to all the fellow Lost Souls out there looking for answers! This morning's question of the day is not in my wheel house of experiences, so I'm reaching out for help in the comments!
Question of the Day
" I want to understand my gender identity."
Now, I'm the first to admit when I'm ignorant and this is a topic I have not had to explore on my own. That being said, I will approach this from a social perspective and how I view Gender Identity as someone raised in a gender binary system.
Identity in General
I'll start by saying that your identity is your guiding light in this world. Knowing who you really are is liberating and gives you that sense of purpose I notice many people are chasing to no avail. I've noticed humans have a tendency to categorize everything, so we create labels for others to place them in relation to ourselves. The thing is, it's not until our adolescence that we start thinking abstractly about life and start questioning the world around us. Until that moment, we live by the labels we are given even if deep inside, it feels like we don't agree. We don't know any better!
Ever have that moment where you think, "I don't even know why I'm doing this?" It could be about your job, your relationship, how you treat yourself or just life in general. We all have a moment where we question ourselves and that moment is ESSENTIAL to our growth. What's happening is we are questioning the script/narrative that was thrust upon us by the society that raised us. In my opinion, this is our true self begging us to rethink our identity and repressing these thoughts causes inner conflict. Basically, this is what we're asking:
" Am I who everyone around me thinks I am? Or, am I who I believe myself to be...who I imagine when I daydream about my ideal life?"
This question demands so much inner work, most people ignore it and move on. As someone who suffered from lack of direction and purpose, I can safely say taking the break from your routine to answer this question is life-changing in the best way. WHO ARE YOU, REALLY?
Gender and Society
I've come to understand that we live in a globally binary system. Though for centuries people have been exploring the fluidity of gender, it's only recently that I noticed people have been demanding acceptance. Makes total sense, as many groups have fought and made progress for their communities in the last century. The thing is, I don't believe we make the distinction between acceptance and belonging.
You can be accepted and still feel like you don't belong! It's the difference between tolerating someone and actually liking/respecting them. This is a huge reason why I believe we should accept our place in society (tolerate it), but fight to belong (normalize it). It starts with self-love.
Self-love allows for others to love you. It's an invitation of sorts. What is normal is temporary. Humans are fickle beings! Start loving who you are and others will too :)
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