hanginthere

Having #Epilepsy is like having a basket full of squirrels 🐿 running amok in your head. #hanginthere 🦾🐿☀️

I know people who feel like they've wasted years of their lives because of poor choices. They spent years in a relationship that was toxic, Years with an addition, Years at a Job where they weren't fulfilled. But you have to realize, Nothing you have been through is ever wasted. Your past experiences, good and bad have deposited something on the inside of you. Those challenges have sharpened you, To make who you are today. Please don't ever forget that... #nothingiswasted #BeStrong #hanginthere

I think those that have been home this year due to COVID restrictions are getting a glimpse into the world of someone with depression. Or agoraphobia.

#Depression #Agoraphobia #MentalHealth #COVID #hanginthere

Jazy Fae wrote a good word on not being able to differentiate between typical “emergency” symptoms; the kind that take you to the ER; because we live it daily. Really bad headache? Check. Numb down half my body? Check. Bizarre reaction to meds? Check. My new normal. Vitals? Totally normal readings.
She makes a point to say keep getting the help you need to keep yourself safe. Do what you need to do. Keep reaching out. As in life there will be those who help and those who hinder (like won’t do diagnostics) but if you keep pushing there are usually more of those that help.
Even though we are hardwired for negative focus (to keep us alive from, you know, sabre tooth tigers and cave bears), hang on to the good stuff. Make it a habit. I’m not saying “just be positive”. Like, you know where to stick that, Sunshine, but really, I find it helps to overwrite the things the not-so-helpful people have said with things the helpful people have said. It was hard at first, but practice and attention are making it easier. Especially when I write it down right away and leave notes for myself to find! 😁
#staysafe #hanginthere

Yesterday I didn’t want to live. Today I cleaned the litter, vacuumed upstairs & downstairs, did a load of laundry, took out the trash, & took a long shower. My mom called to check on me & my friend Sam took two hours of his day to talk about what was going on with me, empathize, catch up, & make me laugh. My kitten stole a full piece of bacon out of the cinnamon roll it was wrapped in, without wrecking or dropping the roll, or me noticing, for hours, like a little orange ninja. I found a writer who moves me, Stephanie Bennett-Henry, reading her work makes me feel less crazy. I am grateful for these small miracles and feel blessed to have bipolar instead of straight up clinical depression. My mania gives me a reprieve from the soul crushing despair of my depression, sometimes mixing with it, but anger and irritability is preferable to the agony of not wanting to live. I choose gratitude for the small miracles and I encourage all of you to look for yours. Hang on, you never know what’s right around the corner.
#Bipolar2 #SuicideOnTheBrain #Depression #Gratitude #MiracleInProgress #hanginthere