Lifesucks

Concentrating is hard today, I didn’t sleep well and my depression kicks in. Unfortunately I have to work.
Life sucks, like all the time

I’m having a very anxiety filled day. My mind is racing and I’m struggling (once again) with wanting to stay. Stay in my job, in my relationships, in my life.
One thing my therapist had talked about when it comes to the trauma I’ve experienced and what the therapy and sessions will bring is this moment where there’s a switch- where I will go from having this burden of trauma to it no longer being such. It won’t be gone, but I won’t be tied down anymore.
It won’t be the thing that influences every thought and action I have, even subconsciously.
And… my question is has anyone ever had that “switch” moment? And if they would be willing to share something about it. #Anxiety #Lifesucks #Therapy #Early Childhood Trauma

I know the #struggles you’re all going through. I’ve actually printed out a letter explaining the “spoon theory” and sent it to my family and gave one to my husband.
It resonated with some, however, most still didn’t understand.
I almost gave up on life in January of 2019.
And had I not changed some things in my life in February 2019, I would’ve done it for real in 2020 when all the #pandemic started.
It’s an everyday activity to stay positive.
I have several batteries around my home.
There’s a positive and a negative on the battery. When I feel negative I grab the battery and hold it to my head and try to find the positive thoughts to the negative one.
I know it sounds weird, but it’s working for me. Example: Negative thoughts...
#Lifesucks I can’t travel,
I can’t see my friends,
I can’t visit my family,
I can’t go to the pool,
or I can’t deal with....
#positivethoughts ....
Life isn’t as bad as I believe it is,
I’ll be able to travel again soon,
I can FaceTime with my family and friends,
I can blow up my pool and sit in it in my back yard and
I can do all things with Jesus.
Yes, I have a personal release with my Savior.
He has helped me get through this life of having a #ChronicIllness
He loves me unconditionally.
He gives me strength when I feel weak.
I make Him first in my life and let Him fill me up and I give from the overflowing love He’s given me.
I also have been taking functional happy products for 2 years.
Now I can power walk for 1 hour 6x a day.
I’m happier 30 minutes after my last sip.
I’m finally on the way to my best life before fibromyalgia took me down.
Love from Wenrella
⭕️❌✌🏽️

Life... do you join in it?
Or is it just too difficult sometimes?
For me, I need my sleep, 12 hrs a day.
I must made an Assessment of my body in the first hour. Some days, I immediately give up....💔😰
#Depression #mdd #Anxiety #PTSD
#TakeaBreak #Migraine #Tinnitus #Lifesucks #CervialSpineDegeneration #diet #CBT #igiveup #needtolose40lbs

I feel so incredibly awful today. My 13-year-old American Staffordshire terrier is really unwell. She’s recently been diagnosed with severe hip displaysia and spinal bridging, and her cognitive status has gone dramatically downhill in the last two weeks. I’ve come to the point of the ultimate cost-benefit analysis - her quality of life versus ... *cries quietly* putting her to sleep. I picked a spot in the yard, but because of all the tree roots I messaged a nearby neighbor who has an excavating company to help dig a hole. I found a biodegradable wood coffin on Etsy and ordered it.
My dog is still alive.
I feel like such a complete ... d*ck doesn’t even fit how awful I feel. I don’t want Xandia to suffer, but I keep weighing it against “We didn’t put Grandma to sleep!” She’s not “all there” right now - I catch glimpses of the dog she was, but ...
I literally haven’t slept more than two hours per night for more than a week. I’m insomniac anyway, but I’m somewhere near psychosis from lack of sleep - I dream while awake and I’m hearing things. I’ve been staying with her in the living room at night to take her outside when she wakes up suddenly. If I don’t catch her in time it triggers a seizure and it’s like a combination of Old Faithful and the Trevi fountain. After three nights of washing dog beds I learned to sleep lightly.
So - add #MDD #Dysthymia to the mix and my life is ... indescribably bad in conjunction with #2020 and the #pandemic . I’d really rather stay in pjs all day curled up with stuffies, but I work from home and have to at least appear productive.
#Lifesucks #whenwillthealiensabductme #CanIDieNow #Depression #Dysthymia #deathsucks #furbabies #stuffies #Pjs #2020sucks