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The Gifts We Are Given By BigmommaJ

Life has a way of surprising us with what it gives. Some gifts arrive beautifully wrapped — moments of joy, laughter, love, and connection. Others show up unannounced and unwanted — loss, disappointment, and struggle. Yet, in their own quiet way, every experience carries something we’re meant to receive.

The easy gifts are simple to recognize. They fill our hearts and remind us why it’s good to be alive. But the hard ones — those often go unnoticed until time softens the edges. Sometimes, the very things that once brought us pain end up teaching us the most about who we are.

The heartbreak that made us more compassionate.
The setback that taught us patience.
The failure that led to growth.

These are the hidden gifts — the kind that can only be unwrapped through reflection and acceptance.

When we start to look at life through this lens, even our struggles begin to shift in meaning. They become teachers rather than punishments. Every challenge offers an opportunity to grow, to see differently, to understand ourselves and others more deeply.

It’s easy to focus on what we lack or what we’ve lost. But when we pause to see what life has already given — even in the smallest ways — gratitude begins to change everything.

So, take a moment today to think about your own journey. What gifts has life placed in your hands? What lessons have quietly shaped you along the way?

✨ Share in the comments: What’s one “gift” life has given you that didn’t look like a gift at first?

Because sometimes, the most meaningful gifts aren’t the ones we ask for — they’re the ones we never expected.

Bigmommaj
#Gifts #MentalHealthAwareness #growth

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The Language I Haven’t Mastered

I’ve learned many languages in my life, but the hardest one to speak has been connection.This poem is for anyone still trying to find their way to fluency in belonging.

The Language I Haven’t Mastered

By Jo Diaz

There are languages made of words,

and others made of nearness.

I’ve learned to translate books,

but not people

not the soft grammar of belonging,

not the pauses that mean I see you.

I practice kindness like a foreign tongue,

phrases under my breath,

intonations rehearsed in the mirror

until they almost sound like me.

I carry a library of gestures in my chest:

how long to hold an eye,

how wide to shape a smile,

how to time a nod so it lands softly,

not too soon, not too late

a choreography invisible to everyone

but the trembling pulse behind my ribs.

Each moment out there

is a tightrope between reaching and retreat,

between the comfort of silence

and the ache of wanting to be seen.

I offer a smile into the static of the world

a small, bright signal

that might or might not find a receiver.

Sometimes it vanishes midair,

and I tell myself that’s okay.

That I am still real

even when no one reflects me back.

So I breathe,

rewrite the line,

and float forward again

a quiet satellite in a noisy sky,

learning that orbiting kindly

is its own form of fluency.

And maybe, somewhere beyond the glare,

there are others who drift like me

who speak in pauses and soft misfires,

who send their light in uncertain directions

but still hope

to find each other in the dark,

and make the spinning

a little less lonely.

#Autism #ADHD , #Loneliness #Connection #MentalHealthAwareness #Poetry “If you orbit like me, I hope this finds you."

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Relentless Crashing Waves of Depression

My husband and I went to Saint Martin for our honeymoon. It was amazing. I have a core memory from that vacation long ago that I often now use as, what I think, is a perfect metaphor for the extreme treatment resistant depression that I struggle with.
Every afternoon we would go swimming in the beautiful blue ocean. Now, while my husband is a very strong swimmer...I am not....at all! Time and time again, I would find myself swept up towards the shore by the strong waves. All I could really do was sit there while the relentless waves crashed upon me one right after another. Every time I tried to stand up, another wave would come and knock me right back down. I could not get my footing to save my life! And every time, my amazing new hubby would come over, hold out his hand, and help me stand again. We always enjoyed a good laugh about it back then.
Well, here we are, 23 years later, and I once again find myself constantly being knocked off my feet, unable to stand by myself...only this time, the waves are dark, scary, stormy waves. And they're 1000 times bigger than before. And they're crashing so fast that even though my still amazing hubby is trying with all his might to help me up, even he is no match for these waves. It's like they've come for my life and they're not leaving until they get it. Of course, these waves are...depression. #Depression #MentalHealth #depressionawareness #MentalHealthAwareness #mentalhealthmatters #MightyTogether

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The cups

When you’re younger, your cup is whole, but as you grow older the hole begins to grow.

Out from the cup your water flows into others, the flow only passing on and on.

The day comes when you realize,

’well what about me?’

but you let it go on too long, you let it happen too much and now you’ll never be complete. #MentalHealth #MentalHealthAwareness #Insomnia #LateNightThoughts #ADHD #exhausted #BipolarDepression

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Know My Name by Chanel Miller

I just finished reading Know My Name by Chanel Miller, and I’m still sitting with everything it stirred up. This memoir is a powerful, unflinching account of Miller’s experience as the victim in the high-profile Stanford sexual assault case, and her journey of reclaiming her identity, voice, and sense of self in a world that so often tries to silence survivors.

What struck me most is how Miller goes beyond the courtroom and headlines. She explores trauma, healing, anger, art, and resilience in ways that are deeply human and relatable, especially for anyone who has ever felt unseen or unheard. Her writing is sharp, poetic, and quietly devastating.

If you've ever felt like your story was dismissed or erased, this book might help you feel a little more understood, and a little less alone. Has anyone else here read it? I'd love to hear your thoughts or how it resonated with you.

#TraumaRecovery #SurvivorsOfSexualAssault #MentalHealthAwareness #BooksThatHeal #KnowMyName #TheMighty

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The Switch Flipped

The Switch Flipped
by Jenn Dacey

Intro:
This is the exact moment I stopped shrinking myself to fit into places I had outgrown.

Don’t push a good person to the point where they no longer give a fuck.
Because once the switch flips, it’s over.
The softness doesn’t disappear—
it just stops being available to people who took it for granted.
The love doesn’t die—
it just stops being handed out like a goddamn reward for bad behavior.

I was the good person.
The one who stayed too long.
Loved too hard.
Apologized too quickly.
Forgave too easily.

I gave benefit of the doubt like it was oxygen.
I extended grace even when I was gasping.
I showed up for people who forgot me the moment their storms passed.
And every time, I told myself, “That’s just who I am.”

But now?

The switch flipped.

I don’t chase.
I don’t beg.
I don’t overexplain.
If you fumble me, you lose me.
No second act. No soft return. No “maybe they’ll change.”

I’ve changed.

That’s what no one expected.
That I would rise—not bitter, but brutal.
Not angry, but awake.
Not heartless, but healed.

You can’t guilt me into going back.
You can’t charm me into forgetting.
I’m not waiting for closure anymore—I am the closure.

The girl who used to cry for love is gone.
She’s resting now.
She did her job.
She kept me alive.

But I’m driving now.
And I don’t take passengers who can’t handle the weight of my worth.

If you wanted me,
you should’ve shown up for me.
When I cried,
when I begged,
when I whispered “I need you” with every ounce of strength I had left—
that was your moment.

But you let it pass.
You watched me unravel,
and stayed silent.
You mistook my patience for weakness,
my forgiveness for permission.

You thought I’d always be there.
But now?

The door’s locked.
The key?
It was made of things you don’t carry:
accountability.
honesty.
effort.
respect.

I don’t owe anyone my undoing ever again.

You don’t get to miss me now that I’m unavailable.
You don’t get to regret what you lost
when you never fought to keep it.

I’m not ice cold.
I’m just done melting for people
who only liked me when I was easy to pour into a glass.

I loved you.
I wanted it to work.
I dreamed of being enough.

But now I realize—
you weren’t even enough for you.

And I’m not staying small to make you feel big.

I have finally, finally arrived
in the space where my peace matters more than your presence.

So if you’re wondering what happened,
if you’re scrolling through our old messages looking for cracks—
here’s your answer:

The switch flipped.

And I’ll never be that soft again
for someone who made me feel like I was hard to love.

#theswitchflipped #traumahealing
#MentalHealthAwareness #Selfworth #BipolarDepression #Suicide #Grief #FromDarknessToLight
#keepgoing
#WhenNothingElseWorked
#SpravatoHope
#strongerthanmystorm
#writingtoheal
#SpravatoSavedMe

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Off the Spectrum by Gina Rippon

📖 Off the Spectrum: Why the Science of Autism Has Failed Women and Girls by Gina Rippon explores how autism research has historically focused on boys and overlooked how autism presents in girls and women.

The book explains why many individuals have been missed, misunderstood, or misdiagnosed—especially when camouflaging or masking behaviors are involved. This pressure to fit in and hide struggles often leads to emotional challenges that can take years to understand.

Key topics include late diagnosis, the female protective effect, and how conditions such as anxiety, sensory sensitivities, and eating disorders are often linked to autism in girls but frequently overlooked. Rippon calls for important changes in research, diagnosis, education, and support to ensure future generations receive better recognition and care.

If you’ve felt that autism diagnosis criteria didn’t fully reflect your experiences or those of people you know, this book offers valuable insights.

#OffTheSpectrum #AutismInGirls #LateDiagnosis #womenandautism #Neurodiversity #Camouflaging #MentalHealthAwareness #InvisibleDisability #TheMighty

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Calm in the Chaos

There’s something so calming about water lilies—quiet, floating reminders to stay grounded even in deep water. I took this photo on a peaceful day, and I come back to it when I need to breathe. 🌿🌸#chronicillnesslife #MentalHealthAwareness #findingpeace #DepressionRecovery #beautyintheeveryday #onemomentatatime #Photography

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